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My Sis Got Married Last Weekend - Final

On the few occasions I have been privileged to attend a Nigerian-Caribbean wedding, I have always been fascinated by the similarities in culture, the colour of the occasion and the beauty of the people. But never did I imagine that one day it would [...]

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My Sis Got Married Last Weekend - 2

My Sis Got Married Last Weekend - 2

For me, the day started on the wrong note.
I was late, and I conveniently blame the damn laptop. It was an afternoon wedding, which suited me just fine. But, like the vast majority of [...]

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Library Talks

“What is going on here?” the Encyclopedia Britannica shouted in shocked tones. “Such noise and within these hallowed walls too.” “Well,” bellowed the Book of A Thousand Proverbs. “We are just debating on how to put an end to this disgraceful business. The love [...]

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It was two months into second semester in The University of Benin(Uniben). The new course time tables had already been mastered and the new courses themselves de-mystified. Lectures were at a dull stage and classes had become soporific. The initial fear of failure had [...]



I saw hell in the University of Benin when I went for Post University Matriculation Exam. I saw good things at first.Believe me. The first thing I noticed in Uniben were the girls. Jesus! Uniben girls were hot! I swear, they were all half- [...]


The Shaggers

My dad told me about a day he and a few friends had an accident while driving. He was in Germany then. He said when he regained consciousness; he noticed people gathered around them. The first question someone asks him is if he wants to smoke. From where I come from, that would be like asking someone in that condition if he or she wants to have sex. [...]

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I was born to this earth, a worm. A brown spineless earth worm. And right from when I knew myself, I hated it. I hated that I was an earthworm. I even hated that I had to hate myself. It was perplexing.

For a [...]



He is known for his eye-catching big head. He proclaims it is filled with wooing lyrics and intellectualism… He calls himself ‘Sexy Johnson’, and claims to have a collection of accolades from many of his sexual encounters.

‘What are these accolades?’ some of Johnson’s [...]


The Youth of Today

Kaizo slammed a chunk of balled fist on the counter raising a thin cloud of dust in the process startling the elderly Officer Okoro who passed out some odorless gas from his anal port. The younger Officer, Osamu sneezed and blinked, looking up at the six foot plus figure of Kaizo. Both officers just blinked and looked at the heaving hulk of a figure before them. Officer Okoro decided he was getting too old for these energetic youth of today. On the radio, the Jamaican reggae artiste, Culture, sang, “..and if you fight against the youth man of today, blood a go run…” [...]

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–Inspired by Jesse Eisenberg; who was inspired by Mark Zuckerberg–

“You smell cheap.” First thing out of his mouth as he sits down.

“Excuse me?”

“I said you smell cheap.”

She’s exasperated.

“Are you mad? I’ve been sitting down, waiting for you for 25 [...]

Read More Dialogue.

The Plan

The Plan - FULL PDF

EMMA, 30s, lies on a the bed sleeping. His head and right
hand bandaged.
I didn’t plan I was going to end up
on [...]

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Party Dress Wahala!

How can I be invited to a cocktail party and the guys are all in jeans and sneakers ehn?! Look at me all dressed up like am about to see the queen and the girls are dressed in spandex like dresses. This is oh [...]

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“That’s my letter! He’s reading my letter!”

My frenzied whispers were drawing glances from the students sitting on the floor around me. I should have cared about the attention I was attracting, but I didn’t. Bizzo was reading my letter! To the whole school!



The husband, the wife, the doctor

The husband was pacing agitatedly in the waiting room.  He was herculean, 6/7 feet tall, and huge, wearing jeans denim trousers and a jeans shirt, and he was handsome, very fair-complexioned ‘sun-brown’, visibly reddening.  He married the wife for five years now, no issue.  [...]

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Is it Your Money?

A Police man slapped Mohammed in Tunisia, so he pours fire for body,truly Tunisian. For naija people will kneel down tying her shoe lace. If she dey Yaba, you can take down to bend down select –they sell police uniform and shoes there. When [...]

Read More Is it Your Money?