You have an interesting story here, @degreatest2. Keep up the suspense.

Your work still needs a bit of polish For example, you have this:

“Yes! Ikeja, general hospital at Ikeja” he figured if she was able […]

But @tai, in that case, the right thing for Jamiu to have done would have been not to promise more than he could deliver. He should have let Mr. Ajayi know when the work would be done so that he was not under […]

This story has a straightforward start, setting out Liz’s life, @trulifebooks, but it doesn’t make me curious to know what happens next, because it feels like a complete story.

The writing is OK, although there […]

Very amusing story, @afroscribe. Football fans can be as fanatically loyal to their team as people are to their ethnic group, but I hope we never see city wide riots because of this.

Well done.

Very good writing, @kwiksie.

I like how you’ve left me very curious to know what got Lola all heated up, so I’ll be on the lookout for the next installment.

Well done.

This would have been an easier and more enjoyable read if there hadn’t been so many digressions along the way, @manueladesola.

@tai, this was a straightforward start, although I must say that there’s nothing here that makes me curious to know what happens next.

Your style of writing was hard to read, with lots of repetition and very […]

This was a beautiful poem, @omoniyi-adeshola. I loved how you showed the many faces and places of the yin and yang of our existence. Definitely deserves to be made an editor’s pick.

Well done – please accept 20 points.

@arinstotle, Is this is about child marriage? If so, it’s an inventive use of metaphor.

The poem could do with a bit of polishing, though.

@tony2, I like the idea of the MC being taken back to the past by seeing a plane that he rode when he was younger. I would have liked it if you had spent more time describing his past so that we could see why he […]

This story needs more work, as there are many errors that need correcting.

Also, this seems like the start of a story rather than a complete story itself. Do you plan to continue, @ngozi-ebubedike?

Very picaresque story, @deedeelicious. Senorita is a real character, although her narrating voice doesn’t really feel like someone from the village.

The narrative flow had me confused. Why was Senorita running, […]

This was a nice read – I liked the way the earth and sky were personified in describing the water cycle. I don’t know if the conversation works as a poem, though.

The part about the flood felt odd… as though […]

@degreatest2,

To be clearer on George/Giorgio, I get that different characters will call him by different names.

My point is that the omnipresent narrator should have a consistent name for him, but this […]

@ifeayomi, the story is a simple one, but there’s no conflict or drama to make it special. it would have been better to make it more memorable.

And it needs a LOT OF WORK. There are very many grammar issues and […]

The story seems to start off OK. Nothing exceptional, though. I do wonder who is at the door.

I agree with @topazo on the transitions – I found them very jarring, especially the transition from the scene in bed […]

Thanks for your comment, @topazo.

Thanks for reading, and spotting the omission, @Ostar. However, I think capitalising Fate is OK in this case.

You bring up an interesting point. Would there be less mediocrity if we all were more like Mr. […]

Thanks for reading, @olajumoke – I’m glad you liked it.

I’m curious – why do you think that delivering a perfect table will impact Jamiu’s ability to meet the needs of his dependants? The two goals are not […]

Thanks, @whyte.

You didn’t want the story to end?

There’s nothing left to tell – poor Mr. Ajayi must continue to search for someone who will make his table and will not have to tell him to manage it after […]