Finding That Missing Part

As a young girl, I was very stereotypical I knew I wanted to
find that someone that I was going to get married. I knew
the exact way I was going to get married. Like every girl I
had every plan of my love life planned out.
When we were around people and I could not stop talking
about how I was going to fall in love and get married, my
mom would always say to the people “ I hope she’ll be a fool
— that’s the best thing a girl can be in the world a beautiful
little fool”. I never understood what that saying really meant,
till now.
Now twenty year later I have have lost that part of me that
had her whole wedding planned out, or was dying to find
that love of my life, but at the time I didn’t know that the part
of me that was missing was this. Now as an adults I was
very stereotypical, I get up at the crack of dawn and going
out to face the real world. Once I got up, I very lazily got
ready for the job that I thought was exciting but after two
years it became a routine. I could feel that there was some
part of me that I knew I wanted more out of life and I was
missing something from the life I was living.
As the work day continued at the largest advertising
company in boston,I was doing the normal routine that has
become a natural habit doing paper work and filing my heart
away. I was waiting for something to happen to change my
normal life. Today was not that day at least it didn’t seem like
it at first. I was about to clock out for the day when I ran into
my boss, like not figuratively but I learned that looking down
at your phone is not a good idea. After I apologized multiple
times,my boss told me that there was an opportunity for me
to help on the next big advertising project. It was my big
break I was finally getting out of my daily routine and
hopefully get that part of that was missing that I thought
went away from my very average life.
I thought it would be a nice way to go out and celebrate my
new opportunity by going out with a few of my friends to a
local cafe. As I got to my favorite cafe I was all of my friends
there they were with their significant others. I was the only
one out of all my friends that didn’t have a significant other.
At first it was upsetting being the only single person out of
the group of friends, but I have done that dating thing for a
few years. I have given up on dating, after you go on so
many dates that have either ended horrible or never went
anywhere after three dates you would give up too. I decided
that if anything is going to happen with finding someone it
will happen because its meant to happen, not because I’m
looking for it.
As the night ended I felt a pair of eye that kept staring at me
throughout the night, but as I looked over to where I could
feel the pair of eyes from, there was no one there looking at
me. So I didn’t think much of it. We said our final goodbyes I
was walking to catch a taxi when a man approached me, it
was a man coming from the coffee shop i could feel when
his eyes hit me that he was the one that was staring at me.I
looked to get a good look at him but all could see was a
silhouette of him. I finally got a good look of him, as me
made his way over to where I was standing. This man had a
very manly built to him, he towered over me which is not
saying much since I was only 5’2. The man was very
handsome he looked like a Ryan Reynolds mixed with
Bradley Cooper. I had the initial instinct to not to say anything
to this man but after trying to hail a taxi the man hailed me
one the instinct change. The only thing I could say is thank
you, as I moved into the taxi as I was about to shut the door
the mystery man told me his name. In a very deep
intriguing voice he said “I’m Daniel by the way.”
I told him my name and went on my way. In the taxi I
couldn’t stop thinking about what just happened, things like
that don’t happen to me especially if a guy is involved
considering I have the worst luck in meeting guys. When I
got home I kept thinking about what just happened and I
couldn’t forget about it so I finally just had to tell myself to
forget about the events of the night.
As I got into the office for the first day on the new project I
told myself that I was going to be the first one in the meeting
room to make a good impression. I sat in the meeting room
sipping on my coffee that I got on the way to the office, then
everyone began filling into the meeting room when all of a
sudden a familiar face appeared. It was the man for last night
it was Daniel. As soon as I saw him walk into the room I felt
my heart skip a beat. This feeling was like nothing I have
ever felt before it was indescribable, but even with that
feeling I brushed it off as if nothing happened and pushed all
of those feeling way down and wouldn’t let them come up. I
was going to be professional no matter what I didn’t want to
ruin this opportunity that was given to me. During the whole
meeting they talked about how we are going to be in
different groups working on different part of this project, I
did not make eye contact with Daniel once because I could
feel his eyes on me. As the people were being assigned into
groups I prayed that me and Daniel not in the same group.
Some how my wish came true.
My group met and started to get an idea together, I finally
was starting to feel excited about work. As the end of the day
rolled around I was getting my thing together and I could
sense someone standing behind me,it was Daniel. As soon
as I turned around I thanked him once again for the taxi.
He told me “It was no big deal it’s the least I could do. By the
way it would be my honor to take you out for dinner.”
My heart just stopped nothing was coming out of my
mouth. Finally a yes came out. I gave him my number and
left the office. As soon as I got home I could believe what
happened. Thoughts of instant regret or doing something
bad rushed through my head. So all I could do is put all of
my guards up, after every previous relationship I have had
made my guards go up higher and higher because they all
took a little part of me.
I got a text from Daniel tell me all the details for our date. The
night of the date I was getting ready but couldn’t help but get
very nervous and almost to want to get ready for the date .
The thoughts running through my mind were what if he
thinks this is a big mistake or doesn’t show up. I finally put
on my favorite red lipstick that looked perfect with the black
playsuit and cardigan I was wearing and unplugged my
curling wand, put on a nice pair of heels did one final check
in the mirror and thought I looked ok but knew I was never
going to be able to convince myself I looked perfect.
As I walked out the door I felt a buzz of my phone and
couldn’t help but think the worst was about to happen, but it
was just my mom checking in on me to see how I was
handling life since I don’t get to see her as much a I would
like to. With that I was a relieved I could focus on the night
ahead. As I made my way into the restaurant I saw Daniel
waiting for me he had a very beautiful arrangements of
flowers waiting for me.
Daniel greeted me with a hug and a kiss on the cheek and
then gave me the flowers some how all of them ended up
being my favorite tulips, roses,lilies. The date was so perfect
it was unreal we laughed so much my side hurt, we had so
much in common we ended up talking for hours and not
even realize the time. As we were say our goodbyes he
went in for a kiss I want to but something made me freak
out only hug him, and leave as quickly as I could. The thing
was that it was not that the date was bad but it was perfect,
it seemed almost to perfect and that made me think
something was up and freak out.
I got home and couldn’t help but start to cry, he one person
that I have gone on a date with and enjoyed the whole time
and I just ruined it because something made me start to
panic. I just sat there crying while my phone buzz a few
times, I knew those were texts and I didn’t even want to see
them because I knew they would be from Daniel. Then my
phone started to ring it was a different ringtone then the
normal one I have, it was the one I gave to my mom. I
knew if I answered the phone she would comfort me, so I
did before I could say a word she knew I was upset.
I was telling about what happened than she began to tell me
a story.
“When you were a little girl all you wanted was love and to
get married. That was the best thing about being young and
not know the world and all the hard time that comes with
finding that love. That saying I used to tell everyone when
you could not stop talking about your future love life meant,
I wanted you to grow up and be oblivious to the harsh
world of falling in love.”
I knew what my mom was talking about all my past
relationships all started off great but hurt me and now I
know that feeling and I’m very aware of it and very careful
about my love life. My mom was right I just need to live
without any reality of the harsh world of love.
After I hung up with my mom, and started to think about
how to put her words into action. I knew I was tired of living
afraid of fall in love, but I didn’t know how to be afraid of
being hurt from falling in love.
This next week was rough I still haven’t talked to Daniel since
our date, avoiding him at work was so hard. I have gotten
so many text and calls from him but I just ignored
everything from him. I really liked him but I just need to give
myself time to know its going to be ok if you just go head
first into falling in love. That night I was sat in my bed
reading the newest romance book that came out that has
been the rave. As you were getting into it, the main female
character was apprehensive about falling in love but did it
anyway. That was the last thing you readed, then you when
to go check your phone you realized you had another
voicemail from Daniel he said “Hi I hope you are ok I haven’t
heard from you. I’m sorry if I did anything wrong but if you
are up to it I’ll be at park in the center of town if you want to
met up and talk.”
After the week of overcoming my fear and reading that
someone else can do it too, I knew the only thing I wanted
to do is fall in love with no fear in the world. I grabbed the
close pair of shoes could find and a sweatshirt and ran out
the door as fast as I could. I wanted to get to the park before
Daniel left. As I raced into the center of the park I saw Daniel
sit on a bench next to the fountain. I made eye contact with
Daniel was I walked over to him. he stood up and started to
say “I’m so glad you came. I’m sorry if I did anything to hurt
you.”
Before he was finished I cut him off and told him what really
happen “After our date when you went to kiss me I started
to panic because no date I have ever been on has gone as
well as did ours and it really scared me.”
Daniel completely understood and he understood that I have
not had good luck with guys and always end up getting
hurt. I told him the quote my mom used to say. Then
explained that its hard for me to falling in love and not care
about the harshness from falling in love I told him “That’s
why I freaked when you tried to kiss me, but now I realize
that I want to be a fool, but a fool in love with you.”
As soon as those words came out of my mouth that feeling
that I have been missing came back the same feeling that I
used to get as a little girl thinking about falling in love and my
wedding.
I knew that all of my guards we gone and were never
coming back. All I wanted to do was to have this feeling stay
when I was with Daniel, and always be a fool not matter
what, because it is the best feeling.



6 thoughts on “Finding That Missing Part” by Meshack Shaxee (@Jezcallmeshaxee)

  1. Errors! As I always advise new writers on this platform, try to give your writing to another person to re-read and/or do thorough editing before sending out. I see alot of tenses errors, no paragraphing and bad punctuations. *twenty years not twenty year* and the likes. This is always a room for improvement, don’t let this stop you. Keep writing.

  2. I couldn’t read it through because it looks so cluttered and that scares me. When you want to post next time, you could double the paragraph spacing. It makes it easier to read that way.

  3. Though the manuscript may not be edited properly, your title is really captivating and I believe there is a good market for this novel if properly worked upon. cheers

  4. Thanks guys, more effort will be applied on my next write up

  5. Whenever you write a piece try to look over it as much as you can. Since I believe none of us are professional editors we will all make mistakes but this piece is riddled with errors and it makes it hard to read. When editing future pieces focus on your sentence structure, verb tenses and just the overall grammar. Its a sweet tale but you dont want errors to block the focus of your words…

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