Disloyal

I Love You….

Three words, two meanings, one thing on my mind…….all for you!

I loved, and yes my loyalty was put to the test…..

A game of three in each case, I had tough choices to make…….and I made the best… (…or was it the worst?!)

What is he talking about…..? (I’m sure you’re left asking)

I’m talking about dates that were never meant to be, never meant to happen, but they just did…..and the price was high (And yes I was labelled “disloyal” on these accounts)

Ruth was………His!!

His light, His love……….His all

They shared everything together, did everything together……the envy of all. Then he had to leave for an operation……..

If I didn’t get her call that night, maybe none of these would have happened…..

If she hadn’t been so broken for his sake, I never would have stayed a second longer….

It was only a matter of time before………

Her touch, her kiss, her hug……I’m reminded of the wrong I’ve said and done…… How I took away a joy you once had……

Please don’t hate and despise her for my sake…….please Joe

What hurts the most is the choices I didn’t have (as hard as it may seem, I didn’t!)

You confided in me on this same issue, not knowing I was the problem…….I knew your pain, yet I couldn’t quench it, I saw your anguish, yet I couldn’t do a thing about it……

Hurt her or be loyal to you? If I stopped caring for her, she still wouldn’t run back to you……..was it okay to have led her on? Walking away would have been like “killing two birds with a single stone”……

I apologise……..(I’m really sorry)

Also…………,

Grace was………free!

Not entirely, as she had him to talk to, care for her, look out for her……….help her through the heartbreak……

I STEPPED IN….

Hers’ was the purest of souls, gentle at heart, meek as a dove…..

Her laugh came with ease, her brows raised with curiosity if she felt she had wronged someone…….

SHE WAS THAT GOOD….

I was the reason for the divide….

The most reason she shunned him, pushed him aside…..

And then…

The look in her eyes, the taste of her lips, the warmth of her skin against mine…… A love affair borne out of deceit!

Yes She loved me in return……or maybe just blinded by my strides, We had moments worth remembering….

Yet with plenty to forget…

Apologies to my best friend, continually treat her like your queen Solomon…..

LESSONS LEARNT…….

Why am I recalling all these? (Any of you may ask)

I simply……

Want a fair hearing….

Try me in the court room of your heart, and let the grace that you once knew me strike out my sins…

Or will they never will?…..

Feel free to call me disloyal on this accounts, but know “Here I stand” wishing you would put it all behind you……

So you can breathe easy…

Truly Yours

Bright Benson.



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