The sun was scorching as usual in Gidan kwano campus FUT minna, there was no breeze, the leaves stood still as the heat of the sun radiated mercilessly, one would think a little of hell fire was released to torment earth, dull uninterested people moved around preoccupied with thoughts of the ongoing exams.
The loud thud of Jonny’s shoes interrupted the stillness and moods.
He ran with all he had so did Gbonka who was chasing him, the dried leaves rattled beneath their rubber soles, the ground shook like an earthquake with each of their steps, the still leaves danced to the rythm of their body that generated breeze as both ran. Jonny ran with the speed of lightening, at that moment he was possessed with the spirit of Usain Bolt, his shirt flew behind like a balloon, his eyes were red as blood.
The chase started from Hall 4, an exam venue, he ran into the open food court and boycotted the tables, he jumped on one table and Somersaulted, he landed firmly on his feet, at that point he was possessed by the spirit of James Bond, the chase proceeded to convocation ground, he dribbled the pillars with ease using his hands and feet to jump chain obstacles, at that moment he was possessed by the spirit of Ronaldo. All the while Gbonka who now resembled a cheeta chased him relentlessly as if his own life depended on it.
After manipulating trees like Jackie chan, doing acrobatics like James bond, dribbling like Ronaldo and running like Usain Bolt a small stone made him trip and he flew across the ground sliding on the gravel like crystal on marbel, at that moment of failure Arsene Wenger’s spirit was in charge, he was about to stand up with agility like a marvel hero when Gbonka caught up with him and hugged him tightly.
For years no could boast of ever seeing gbonka smile but he did at that lucky moment he caught Jonny, mercilessly he dragged Jonny towards the VC’s office amidst the crowd, the uninterested crowd that were bothered about exams now had something interesting, it was not everyday that a security man chased a student like a thief.
Two amebo’s who had followed the chase from the start had now caught up, they were panting and rested their hands on their knees to catch their breath.
They started running back to Hall 4 from where they were sent, soon they got back in Dr Waguda’s car, the distance was quite short but Jonny and Gbonka chose to run round the school.
A cheer went round the crowd as Jonny who was already shaking wet his trousers, still along with Gbonka, Dr Waguda and crowd Jonny was led towards the VC’s office.
Gbonka had been working as a security guard for 12 years now, his usual station was at the gates of various school venues, during exams he sometimes guarded the door and helped in transporting forcefully a miscreant who is caught cheating to the VC’s office, that happened very scarcely, something interesting happened whenever cultist were on the chase, it was usually at night and no one would see his theatrics as he had shown now. The securities and police men learnt to leave the cultists alone when there was a shoot out and the cultists won, they also abducted a top government official and locked him up in the toilet, they knew they were no match.
But today as usual Gbonka was doing his duty guarding the door when he noticed a student who looked everywhere except the computer in his front, he sat at the edge of his seat, Gbonka knew he didn’t read and was scared, he also knew that he couldn’t cheat since the exam was CBT so he decided to give him a deadly stare to make him more uncomfortable and scared.
Not long after the boy ran out at great speed and Gbonka followed him automatically, when the chase became hard Gbonka refused to stop, it was a case of his reputation.
Jonny was a 4th year electrical engineering student, almost the best in his department, he had a GP of 4.8 which was a incredible the topper a Yoruba girl was at 4.99 which was a miracle.
Jonny’s life is usually from hostel to class to library to sports field to kpakungu on Saturdays for chilling, if sitting under a tree with friends and eating kilishi was chilling and fellowship in Elf lay out on sundays.
After service one Sunday a girl named Cynthia walked up to him, this girl was everybody’s dream girl, she had Mercy Johnson’s body, Jackie Apiah’s face, Nadia Buari’s complexion, Stephanie Okererke’s height, Agbani Darego’s grace, Rita Dominic’s lip and Eku Edewor’s voice all in all she was a lethal combination and obviously out of Jonny’s league but as Kirk got lucky and landed Molly in the movie she’s out of my league it was Jonny’s day cus Cynthia’s chatted with him like an old friend, exchanged numbers and pecked him on the cheeck after saying good bye, Jonny thought am I dreaming as Cynthia walked away.
Jonny was lost in dreamland as he made his way to Gidan Mangoro close to his school to visit his friend Lamakuda, it wasn’t everyday a girl pecked him, that too a girl like Cynthia, Jonny’s imagination ran wild causing discomfort in his trousers as he made his way to his friend’s. his friend on the other hand welcomed him like a heroe and Even offered him kilishi for the great achievement.
He jisted his friend as both of them tore large portions out of the kilishi to eat, they did not drink water though their mouth was burning harshly so as not to allow the other to have a larger portion.
‘Do you have her number? Lamakuda asked.
‘Yes na, you think say I dey lie? Jonny said.
‘Ehen show me.’
‘Guy you be badooo.’ Lamakuda said as if the number looked like Cynthia.
‘No be small tin.’
‘Omo guy from deeper life sister Yemi to miss world Cynthia, but guy wait o, no be LIT she dey?
‘Una get inter departmental course with LIT?
‘No naa wetin carry LIT enter Elet Elec? Jonny asked with a frown.
‘Then wetin she wan from you, no be say she wan make you teach am something, or say mek you do her assignment for am.’
‘Wetin na, na only assignment I dey do for girls, are you forgetting that unlike you I have a girlfriend.
‘No guy, but be careful, a girl like Cynthia cannot give something without expecting something much more in return.’
‘She’s not in my Dept, she no say I no get money wetin she go ask.’
His state of euphoria evaporated from a mettalic state to a gaseous state like heated sodium undergoing sublimation as as he entered his room and saw his girlfriend Yemi waiting for him.
Yemi was such a girl who lived by principles, A diehard extremist in religion but she still had a boy friend, she was washing when her friend Delilah entered and was singing Yemi Alade’s Jonny loudly.
‘Jonny leave you follow Cynthia and you don’t know what to do and he talk say you no do am like the way Cynthia dey do.’ She remixed the lyrics.
‘Frendo, you get Jonny? Yemi asked straightening up, she knew the song was for her ears.
‘Which one leave you follow Cynthia na?
‘Hehehehehe no be me na you.’
‘What’s that.’ Yemi asked rather annoyed.
‘Your Jonny don leave you follow Cynthia and he talk say you no do am like the way Cynthia dey do, or you no even do am at all as Christ no go allow.’ Delilah sang on.
‘Stop talking rubbish.’
Delilah ignored and continued singing, later when Yemi was spreading her clothes she overhead a discussion and the girls stopped as soon as they saw her, she could take it no longer she went to Jonny’s room he wasn’t in, she sat down and waited.
Jonny was able to manipulate Yemi, giving reasons such that only Yemi would accept, he mentioned Christ ever so often that when Yemi left, after a long prayer session which Jonny endured all the while immersed in Cynthia’s thoughts and offering occasional loud over enthusiastic Amen whenever Yemi paused, a large grin played on her lips. Her man was faithful.
Cynthia worked Jonny’s brain up so that when she was through with him his wit and innocence were gone. Then she landed him in the biggest shit of his life.
‘Jonny you’ve got what you’ve always dreamed of it’s payback time.’ She said casually. At first Jonny thought she was kidding, after all she made him witless but she was not joking, Jonny’s nightmare had just begun, Cynthia’s cultist boyfriend threatened to finish him if he did not sit for exams for him.
‘But that’s impersonation.’ He protested sheepishly.
An ugly crease appeared on the thug’s face as he thrusted a bag containg a fake exam card, ID card and the handouts for the course to Jonny.
‘I know you’re the best, if I get B I’ll manage but C you go pay, Cynthia don already settle you.’ He said and left.
A fear gripped Jonny studied for the exam and on the D day proceeded to the hall, Gbonka checked his credentials at the entrance and twisted his neck meaning “go in”. He sat facing the computer with his heart racing, his shirt’s collar was wet with sweat and his arm pit slippery from same effect. He looked up and a lecturer was staring at him intently, he looked around and the students were gazing at him suspiciously after all he was not their course mate, he looked towards the door and Gbonka gave him a diehard stare.
At this point he was vibrating, he looked at the computer it was blank. Jonny stood up as if prompted by an unknown force and made towards the door in flight mode, Gbonka followed him, the lecturer sent two boys after them, others had gathered and wondered what was chasing him.
As Jonny wet his trousers, he felt totally humiliated, without further ado he went limp and fell on the ground, he remembered to roll his eyes backwards, Gbonka and the rest changed direction to the school clinic.