I drove past another street light, and the illuminations added some form of life to the falling pellets of rain. My wipers waved back and forth restlessly. It was past nine o’ clock, and the only sounds that kept me company,were the radio static, and the sound of rain pellets falling on the car, like small pebbles.
The dark silhouette came to view again, making me shudder. I stepped on the accelerator, and my 2004 Volvo sped on, closer to the horrific image, splashing rain water on whoever cared to stay outside the road by that time.
As I drove closer, the motionless body stood in the middle of the road, waiting for me. His eyes were sunken, making the sockets seem oversized. What was left of his flesh hung loosely on the limp frame, standing a little taller than 6 feet.
“Help me, you know what to do…” I felt rather than hear the him speak. I chose to block my mind. The living does not communicate with the dead. As I moved closer to the ghost, some features of his face came clearer in view. High cheek bones, flat forehead. The stern look he wore must be the best a dead body can summon, but he must have been a really tough person when he was alive. I drove right through him, and watched through my rear end mirror, as the ghost dissolved into the darkness.
I heaved a huge sigh of relief, and then realized I had been holding my breath.
Why are you scared? I wondered. I am a ghost charmer, and a very successful one at that. I do not understand why this particular spirit disturbs me. My line of work is rather unusual, I help people make sure their beloved ones who are no more, are faring well. When Mrs Fakayode came to me concerning her dead brother, I accepted the job, and charged the regular fee of 20 thousand naira. I performed the séance following each step like I always do.
I had a hard time finding the man’s spirit. There was a chasm, and it took me over two weeks to cross it. Ideally, you never cross a chasm. I only broke the rules because I didnt want a first time client to think I was a fake.
Now that I think about it, I wish I had put my ego aside. The reason you never cross a chasm, is because when you do, ghosts see you just as you can see them, and sometimes, it gets messy because if you dont guard your essence carefully, they can use you to come back to the land of the living.
I saw the spirit, and even though the aura surrounding the man’s spirit was green- undoubtedly a bad sign, I told Mrs Fakayode her dearly departed was doing well, and on his way to eternity.
Mrs Fakayode’s business was a done deal, but one of the ghosts that spotted me entering their realm clung to my essence, and wouldnt let go.
I discovered that this man had an unfinished business, and his death was unnatural. Now he haunts me, but I do not want to meddle in extra terrestrial matters. But then, HOW DO I IGNORE THE IMMINENT DANGER I SEE?
….HELP ME…. the spirit found his way into my mind again, even though he was no longer in sight.
By the time I got home, it had stopped raining, but most provision stalls were closed already. Even my gateman was already making himself comfortable in his tiny wooden shed, so I had my horn honking longer than usual, before he could drag his sleep drugged self, to open the big gates.
“Adi! Come here abeg” I called, as I parked my car, while he locked the gates.
“Ha, Oga, walahi, bread don finish” he had no clothes on, and the weather was cold. As he shivered, his essence was sent jiggling all around. Little things like this used to freak me out, when my gifts started manifesting itself, but over time, I have become impervious to all the weirdness that comes with the trade.
It had been a long day. I couldn’t find time to grab something for neither lunch nor dinner.
” okay, sardine dey?” I asked, and my tummy growled loudly.
” yes e dey.” he replied, and rushed off to his stall.
” Ha! Oga! walahi breadi dey o” he shouted with excitement.
He came out with a rather stale loaf of unsliced agege bread, and a tin of sardines. I didn’t mind.
” Help me please! Call Clay& Harrows…” Adi said, as I took my dinner from him.
” What! What did you just say?” I lunged forward, and shook Adi roughly. I shook him hard, and drove the spirit out of him. He had just been possessed.
“Ehn? Oga? Wetin happen” he asked, wondering why I was rough handling him.
“Nothing Adi. Go wear shirt, and drink hot tea. Wheather too cold.” I said, taking the bread and sardines from him, and handing him the money.
I’m sure like many people who know me, he went to bed wondering what kind of weirdo I was.