Folorn

Eyes

Misty

Glassy

Foggy

Tears

Trickling in

Slow motion

Cascading

Trailing new paths

Downwards

 

Heart

Spluttering

Stopping

Picking up

Laboring

Sweating

Via the eyes

 

Waves

Of pain

Billowing

Crashing

Overwhelming

Submerging

 

Gasps

Of breath

Caught in mid air

Halting

Sighs

Chest constricted

In agony

Heart bleeding

tears of

Love lost

 

 



21 thoughts on “Folorn” by topazo (@topazo)

  1. Its hard to to make comments on poetry. Poems are too subjective.

    1. @kaycee thanks for stopping by. Glad to see around here

  2. Your good use of imagery conveyed the emotion within this piece. I especially like “Waves; of pain; billowing; crashing; overwhelming; submerging”. Very violent torrents of anguish is what I understood by that. Very nice! @topazo

    1. @scarlettgarnett thanks for the comment. I’m glad you liked it. Heart break is never easy

  3. Beautiful poem. I wish I could use imagery as effectively as that. Keep up the good work

    1. Thanks @mcsnol
      It’s a matter of doggedness at the art…

    1. @khadijamuhammad thanks

  4. It’s really nice, (sometimes passing through something helps one convey the feeling accurately. Hope you didn’t however.)

    1. @funpen who hasn’t had their fair share of heartbreaks?
      Thanks for stopping by

  5. I agree with @Kaycee…it’s hard to pass judgements on poetry. It’s way too personal. But I like the poem though.

    1. Thanks for liking…

  6. My favorite doc on Ns, this’s one heck of a ‘dizzy dazzle’, you make me wanna hit the page and put up Dizzy Dazzle 2. This is lovely and inspiring, so sad nothing has in this form has come out for me after that sleepy poem of mine.

    ps: I’m mindful of the way I comment on love poems by guys on NS. If I spend 7 years becoming a resident like Topazo, and another 14 years for being perceived gay, will God give me stoppage time?

  7. @topazo
    intriguing………..

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