My Glassy Heart!

A train ravels down the rail,
Cloud nine enough to block the sound of a baby’s wail

I’ve stood the test of time,
Coughed enough to a seizure without a curing-lime

A lot punctured through the harmless dart,
As though it was helpless, was strong enough not to part

Through the worlds,
Wonder stem grow my pods

Quite a dozen doubled up the years,
Function to pump the red fluid still rears.

It had only given in a lot for empty profess
Profess of tongues admix, nevertheless.

It had served enough shield,
As though it was on a war field.

The pinches-wound turns nothing but scalps
Recur numerously to build up in caps

Times never seizing
Seasons never ceasing

Through Coldy-fooly and windy-witty
It’s moisty, it’s dusty

Thorough wet and dry
I Laugh, I cry

Through the cold-blue and hot-brown
I Smile, I frown

Through the test of time; a clone.
I beat against my glassy heart in tone,
till it turned stone.



14 thoughts on “My Glassy Heart!” by Kleavajimcy (@Kleavajimcy)

  1. Nice rhymes.

  2. the rhymes are good if taken on their own but the poem looks more like a collection of words that are stringed together loosely…… many words used here are out of context and makes deciphering the meaning of the poem difficult.
    keep writing…but poetry is not about rhymes or big words…it’s the flow, the rhythm. the pace, descriptions and imagery and the depth that matters…
    well done

  3. @elovepoetry.. ♡̬̩̃̊ƭћªΩќs♡̬̩̃̊ For reading!

  4. @topazo , ƭћªΩќs a lot for your constructive criticism Sir! Though lessons quite learned before filling the inks! I actually got your point, but this particular poem covers beyond the eyes can see; words well hidden within the lines a bit! The fact is just that poetry never ceases to come in different ways/versions! Some do have their first 2 to 3 paragraphs to build of d story line, so U may actually be kept wondering “what the hell is this” until u finish reading… While some jumps into the story line from the outset! The former is just a paraphrase kind of. It all depends on the understanding of the reader! I’d advised you have a good re-read, probably you could understand those “loosely stringed words” as thought! Trust me, the words and rhymes here are not meant to impress, nor marvel…each has got its correspondence! Probably you could figure out those lapses for me to see; I may have a better explanation you know!
    Thanks once again! God bless!

  5. “A train ravels down the rail,
    Cloud nine enough to block the sound of a baby’s wail”

    how does a train ‘ravel’? to ravel is to disentangle, loosen into thread….how does this apply here? or you meant to write ‘travel’

    “I’ve stood the test of time,
    Coughed enough to a seizure without a curing-lime”

    coughed enough to a seizure? what does that mean?

    “A lot punctured through the harmless dart,
    As though it was helpless, was strong enough not to part”

    a dart is a form of arrow that is used in warfare or in a game usually aimed at the bull’s eye of a darts board. so i am wondering how a ‘lot” can puncture it. then “a lot punctured through” is wrong usage of grammar.
    what is the meaning of “lot”? i don’t particularly understand its usage in this line.

    Through the worlds,
    Wonder stem grow my pods

    Quite a dozen doubled up the years,
    Function to pump the red fluid still rears.

    It had only given in a lot for empty profess
    Profess of tongues admix, nevertheless.

    It had served enough shield,
    As though it was on a war field.

    The pinches-wound turns nothing but scalps
    Recur numerously to build up in caps

    “Times never seizing
    Seasons never ceasing”

    Through Coldy-fooly and windy-witty
    It’s moisty, it’s dusty

    Thorough wet and dry
    I Laugh, I cry

    Through the cold-blue and hot-brown
    I Smile, I frown

    Through the test of time; a clone.
    I beat against my glassy heart in tone,
    till it turned stone.

    i could go on and on but i think you get my drift….well done

  6. Okay okay! I got your questions! I actually meant “travel” for real…not “ravel”…was surprised when I saw it too…I ought to have made d first comment abt it, but thought people would actually understand! Thank God It wasn’t improvised in completion of the rhymes! Lolz!

    “I’ve stood the test of time
    Coughed enough to a seizure without a curing-lime!”

    Seizure simply means “the act of seizing”. So, I have beenn through a lot…I have even coughed to the point of death..

    “…Without a curing-lime” –the lime is meant to cure the cough–
    There was no cure to my illness, but one way or the other; even after seizing, I skipped through! That is where “I’ve stood the test of time” applies! The preceding and proceeding lines have actually got correlation!

    Sometimes you just have to read very well, and look beyond the grammatical meaning before you jump into conclusions! This is a poem, not a news!

    “A lot punctured through the harmless dart
    As though it was helpless, was strong enough not to part”

    “A lot” has different meanings, but what it meant in the poem was “a large number or great amount of…”… And of course, if I don’t know the meaning of dart, I wouldn’t have put it in the first place!
    Like you said; a dart is the one meant to puncture, (I.e, to indent or make small holes) right? But this particular one is a “harmless dart”. So, a lot(like pins, nails, swords…) could have actually be punctured through it, since it wasn’t carrying out it’s able purpose! But as helpless as the dart was, it was still strong enough not to part…not to break!

    It’s always better to take your time and assimilate before you jump into conclusions, you know! Just like you jumped into conclusion of a “wrong usage of grammar”.

    And if you had continued; I would have been glad to do justice to it to! I didn’t write a song…I wrote a poem!

    …Thanks once again Bro! God bless you!

  7. @Topazo I am sure he gets your drift. Who wouldn’t? Hehe.
    There is a form of poetry called ‘Found’. Lines from different places are put together, mayhaps it is a Found poem.
    Klea, the poem really could do with an edit especially as regards word usage, like topazo pointed out.
    Keep writing. Well done. $ß.

  8. @topaz
    Okay okay! I got your questions! I actually meant “travel” for real…not “ravel”…was surprised when I saw it too…I ought to have made d first comment abt it, but thought people would actually understand! Thank God It wasn’t improvised in completion of the rhymes! Lolz!

    “I’ve stood the test of time
    Coughed enough to a seizure without a curing-lime!”

    Seizure simply means “the act of seizing”. So, I have beenn through a lot…I have even coughed to the point of death..

    “…Without a curing-lime” –the lime is meant to cure the cough–
    There was no cure to my illness, but one way or the other; even after seizing, I skipped through! That is where “I’ve stood the test of time” applies! The preceding and proceeding lines have actually got correlation!

    Sometimes you just have to read very well, and look beyond the grammatical meaning before you jump into conclusions! This is a poem, not a news!

    “A lot punctured through the harmless dart
    As though it was helpless, was strong enough not to part”

    “A lot” has different meanings, but what it meant in the poem was “a large number or great amount of…”… And of course, if I don’t know the meaning of dart, I wouldn’t have put it in the first place!
    Like you said; a dart is the one meant to puncture, (I.e, to indent or make small holes) right? But this particular one is a “harmless dart”. So, a lot(like pins, nails, swords…) could have actually be punctured through it, since it wasn’t carrying out it’s able purpose! But as helpless as the dart was, it was still strong enough not to part…not to break!

    It’s always better to take your time and assimilate before you jump into conclusions, you know! Just like you jumped into conclusion of a “wrong usage of grammar”.

    And if you had continued; I would have been glad to do justice to it to! I didn’t write a song…I wrote a poem!

    …Thanks once again Bro! God bless you!

  9. And it’s usually more interesting when a writer has an arsenal of points to defend his work like you’ve done. So, I’ll read with ‘fresh eyes’ and see the difference.

    I have, and still, some things are unclear. Maybe I just don’t get it.
    Keep writing, Klea.

    1. That’s poetry for you! Sometimes u don’t get the full gist in one fold! Sir Achebe’s poems don’t go straight either! Thanks thanks!

  10. @bubblina …thanks for the recommendation! Just wish there’s something called “PERFECT”.

  11. @bubbllinna …thanks for the recommendation! Just wish there’s something called “PERFECT”.

  12. Klea. That word exists only with God. Since we are made in His image, we just keep trying.
    PERFECT may not exist, but we aim to reach it. We go dey learn dey go.

    1. Yeah! True talk tho’…Kudoles!

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