Enestera Chronicles: Weeping Coffers 3

abstract_wallpaperart20 Caught in midstride Chemokai couldn’t breathe. The Queen was making her way to the head of the table and the other councillors were taking their seats. As Chemokai made his way back to his seat his heartbeat thundered in his ears. He had to make the impromptu plan work–somehow.
Without more thought, he rose and bowed before the gathering.
“Great councillors, permit me to interupt the meeting procedures to present a surprise to the house,” He scanned the room for reactions, satisfied he continued,
“Hearing of this meeting I was instantly inspired to create a work in honour
of this Council. To accompany it, I designed a marvel that awaits your pleasure in the royal gardens. If you would step out to the gardens briefly, it would be my pleasure to present it.

“Beautiful! ” Said Queen Myne “What is the theme?”

“My lady, I fear that would be giving too much away.” Chemokai said with his most charming smile.

“Hmm very well, gentlemen and lady shall we see what Sir Chemokai has for us?” said the queen

The councillors rose and milled towards the door. Chemokai found himself just behind Kakai.

“Well, well, it appears some of us have really been thinking of the planet.” Kakai snickered “What’s on your mind pretty boy? Hoping to get a bonus? ”

Chemokai chuckled “You don’t say, so that’s how you rose up the ranks. I’ll save that in my diary , might be useful if I find myself starting over again.”
With that they left the council hall and the planted recording devices. His plan worked!

*******************

The Royal gardens were at the west wing of the Palace. They had miles of impeccably groomed carpet grass speckled with roses, hibiscus, ixora and azaleas. The flowers were in full bloom red,orange and purple , a rainbow of flowers. There were trees too: almonds, mango, and tropical apples. Chemokai barely noticed this as he led The councillors to the shade of a large almond tree, where there were concrete seats.

” So,” Tokai asked, a puzzled look on his face , “Where is this “magnificent” masterpiece ?

Chemokai replied ” Sir Tokai, My queen and noble Council , there is no masterpiece. I had to find a way for us to leave the hall, I discovered it was bugged. ”

“Impossible!” said the Queen

Subla’s hands flew over her mouth in shock. she whispered a ragged “Oh my goodness.”

Kakai threw his head back and laughed “Yes! Finally! Something interesting in these parts.”

Tokai Frowned “Chemo are you very sure of this?”

Chemo didn’t respond, instead he set up his tablet and mobile projector to display the events of the past hour. when he finished the Council was silent. Each of the nobles lost in a million thoughts.

Tokai spoke next ” There is no way bugs could be placed in the Council chambers without an insider. We have a traitor in our midst.”

A gentle breeze swayed the trees and the councillors looked at each other with a sense of unease.

Kakai spoke next ” It is about time isn’t it? For so long we have drifted aimlessly, basking in past glory, content in maitaining the status quo. Our numbers have trebled but the quality of our output has plunged! It is only normal that our current state would attract trouble.” He shrugged ” My guess is it’s a rival planet planning to take us over, Dragging us into a athousand years of servitude with bronze hooks in our noses. Maybe then we will come up with a plan to stop circling the same mountain.”

“Kakai!” Subla said flashing him an angry look.

“What?” Kakai replied ” I am just stating the obvious. For years we have allowed sentiment to govern our actions. Outwardly we are doing well but beneath it all where are we? What are we? We soothe ourselves with pools of puerile praise which we lap up daily. Every lump of horseshit dumped is acclaimed as ‘Nice’ ‘Cool’ and ‘Well done”, every appalling first draft is ‘Thanked for sharing”. Even I have had to tag along with a ‘Wow’ here and there but you know what ? I am tired! I am tired of this hollow shell we have become. I am tired of the lack of standards and the hypocritical pats on the back we offer to mediocre mumblings unworthy of the space they take up. I am so tired that soon I might be the next to board an inter galactic spaceship out of here, I have had enough! Enough!
With that he sat down in a huff , tapping his feet on the grass and folding his arms as he rocked back and forth with the dregs of his fury.

Tokai stood “That is indeed enough, Kakai. Everyone here loves Enestera. That’s why we have given her our time ,talents, gifts and treasures. Life is about change. Things, people, circumstances and planets change. Our duty as gaurdians is to adapt to the change in ways that will bring benefit to our people. We need to find new answers to the questions, to ask new questions. To keep seeking, keep growing, keep fulfilling our mission, our reason for being in the in the galaxy.”

Queen Myne rose then.
“Noble councillors of Enestera you are welcome to the Royal Palace. I convened this meeting so we could deliberate and come up with ideas to curb the low quality of the exports we are currently sending out. Yes, we have been a leader in in the literati circles in this region for aeons but times are changing, readers are becoming more informed and more picky. I believe there is a way to improve the quality of our produce and the overall experience of being an Enesterian. And I know that no others hold this planet dearer to heart than you do.
The events of this morning show that our weaknesses are becoming obvious. Whoever bugged the Council chamber didn’t do it to find out our favourite colours. More so, they might have a plan to bring destruction and pain to our domain. I suggest that we think both long term and short term. First we must find a way around the current threat, then we must continue our task of forging a way forward for the planet. ” She paused satisfied that she had their total attention, she continued.

“We have to split ourselves and begin urgent problem-solving.
First we have to find out who planted the bugs in the hall. Then we have to come up with viable plans to improve the quality of our products and our overall quality of life on the planet. Lastly we need to find where our best brains are going. Where is Kyla? Weirdkai, Enola, Quela, Jeffla, Makai? We need asnwers to these very fast.”

” I have an idea.”

Everyone turned towards the speaker, surprised.

To be continued.



35 thoughts on “Enestera Chronicles: Weeping Coffers 3” by Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

  1. And the search for a solution goes on.
    You got kakai’s reaction right, even down to the huffing and puffing. Lmao!
    ‘Chemo’ slipped past sha..
    I love this Ernestra.. Really interesting piece and place.
    Well done, nicole. $ß.

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      Yes it does, thank you @Sibbylwhyte

  2. I was going to say the same thing about Kakai’s reaction. On point,Sunshine.
    Watch out for the typos,though.
    Keep writing…

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      I will, thankyou for reading, @mimiadebayo

  3. interesting….a note though, when a baby takes his first step and falls, he gets a pat in the back not because he has done great but because that is the first step to walking and the beginning of a new phase….
    a ”nice” ”keep it up” every now and then can go a long way in birthing another Hemingway….

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      @Topazo ,very true, but the best i think is to be honest but gentle, firm but encouraging. The irony, we get better with firmer handling than being left to our ways…. Thank you for your words of wisdom.

  4. Nice! Cool! Thanks for sharing! WOW! *and i meant these, crossed my heart* *Chuckling like mad*

  5. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

    @nira-slyves @AlabaO @Raymond @expo @kodeya @ayomitans @leroyA @Olan @Olaedo Please comment honestly and constructively. Thank you.

  6. Lovely. Brisk, easy read & an ingenious plot that pinpoints a crucial NS issue while keeping up on suspense makes this a winner for me. I see that ‘name-dropping’ would work for its popularity.
    If I have any issues with this, that would be because of personal preferences, not the story. Expecting the next piece.

  7. There are too many errors. Still, i like the story.

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      @kaycee thanks for reading, a little specificity would go a long way.

  8. @nicolebassey, welldone Sunshine. One thing I like about you is that you can do any genre and still ‘bring it’. I liked the dialogue between the councillors.It was funny and well written. I don’t usually read speculative but you know what, I would like to read the next one and find out who has joined them for the meeting. Welldone.

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      Thank you @Olajumoke , I really appreciate your time and thoughts.

  9. @nicolebassey to be truthful I sort of struggle with it, but not because it wasn’t a good story but because it’s not my kind of story.

    However it’s well written, you got the reaction of your characters accurately, so can’t really fault it and took us through the story well.

    There were some long sentences though, just be careful about that.

    Well done

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      @dnky111 thank you , I will.

  10. Hehehe…So which one am I? Raises some important issues though…

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      Well… there might just be a vacancy for you, with the villains ;-), thanks @Raymond

  11. I don’t usually read things like this… but this one got me hooked……

    1. Sunshine (@nicolebassey)

      @kodeya Thank you very much, i appreciate your support.

  12. it’s a nice story, interesting actually…. it’s chronicles, right? waiting for more

  13. @nicolebassey, this is vintage you- well written, and enjoyable.

    Now, this part was absolutely breathtaking:

    “What?” Kakai replied ” I am just stating the obvious. For years we have allowed sentiment to govern our actions. Outwardly we are doing well but beneath it all where are we? What are we? We soothe ourselves with pools of puerile praise which we lap up daily. Every lump of horseshit dumped is acclaimed as ‘Nice’ ‘Cool’ and ‘Well done”, every appalling first draft is ‘Thanked for sharing”. Even I have had to tag along with a ‘Wow’ here and there but you know what ? I am tired! I am tired of this hollow shell we have become. I am tired of the lack of standards and the hypocritical pats on the back we offer to mediocre mumblings unworthy of the space they take up. I am so tired that soon I might be the next to board an inter galactic spaceship out of here, I have had enough! Enough!With that he sat down in a huff , tapping his feet on the grass and folding his arms as he rocked back and forth with the dregs of his fury.”

    The words are honest, the imagery, very perfection…

    I think for a moment there, I saw you – the no BS, straight-shooting you. And, God, I loved what I saw! But don’t leave sha o.

    Seriously though, while I do share Kakai’s emotions, we must also not discard the usefulness of our political-correctness as @topazo pointed out. Doing that could bring on us anarchy, bitter derisions and un constructive infighting.

    The status quo may be imperfect, but it may be all we can work on.

    You did good here, Sunshine

  14. Hehehe…I enjoyed this. Engaging. This Kakai will soon be flogged by the boss from the other planet…. :)

    Permit me to point out some typos:

    1. In a number of places, you leave a space between the quotation mark and the word: [” He scanned the room… instead of “He scanned the room…]

    2. [“Beautiful! ” Said Queen Myne “What is the theme?”] This should be written as:
    “Beautiful!” said Queen Myne. “What is the theme?” (small s for said, full stop after Myne, deleted space between exclamation mark and quote.”

    3. [“Hearing of this meeting I was instantly inspired to create a work in honour
    of this Council.] ‘Of’ begins another line instead of continuing on the preceding line.

    4. [“…our reason for being in the in the galaxy.”] in the x2

    5. [Tokai stood “That is indeed enough, Kakai] Full stop after ‘stood.’

    6. [That’s why we have given her our time ,talents, gifts and treasures] the space before the comma after time should be deleted, and a space created between the comma and ‘talents.’

    7. [And I know that no others hold this planet dearer to heart than you do.
    The events of this morning show that our weaknesses are becoming obvious.] Absence of paragraph spacing.

    8. [First we must find a … for the planet. ” She paused satisfied that she had their total attention, she continued.] This is the correct version:
    First we must find a … for the planet.” She paused satisfied that she had their total attention. She continued, “We have to split ourselves…”

    And some.

    Waiting for the next part. Well done, Sunshine. Keep improving your art.

  15. @nicolebassey, this was well written enough that no typo jumped out and stabbed me in the eye.

    There’s not much to say, since you already know what I think about the storyline. I’ll just keep on following to see where it leads…

  16. Epic.

    Your creative juices are definitely oozing all over NS pages…@nicolebassey

    Bravo….!

  17. sambright (@sambrightomo)

    “Where is Kyla? Weirdkai, Enola, Quela, Jeffla, Makai?” That is also my question.
    Continue to seek for solution to the problems in this planet,God help you. Welldone @nicolebassey

  18. sunshine@nicolebassey, thanks for tagging me on this story, I had to search for the previous installments and they read O.K to me. I felt a bit inadequate commenting on goings-on at NS, as I only just got here officially. I actually used to sneak in, read from/off the site and sneak out ”jeje’, until i became a ”card-carrying member”. I liked the element of satire, you brought in and play on characters. And the subtle way you communicated salient truths, Showed guts on your part and I guess it must have set people in the community thinking on how to get the ”glory days” back. Most especially the gatekeepers/head-honchos.Off comments made that i have read to all the postings, It can only get better i dare say. Well done. By the way, (winking surreptitiously and rubbing hands together with glee-there is no emoticon for this): who is that character that left Enestra, swearing never to come back? Don’t mind me oooooooooo. Go on,Girl!! More power to you.

  19. @sunshine: Guess, I am just seeing this. I trust others to correct you on your typos. I enjoyed the hidden intent of this work more than the work itself (sorry)…perhaps the quality of works produced in Enestera was due to the fact that they were just interested in ‘coupling and procreation’ creating a population boom without putting a check on the quality of population….don’t mind me jare…carry on

  20. @nicolebassey, this is a nice write up, weldone.

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