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Love in Paris 2

He got to the portharcourt airport by 6:30pm and boarded his flight after going through security. He was going to to take a night flight which was scheduled for 9pm, from the murtala mohammed international airport in Lagos to Paris. It took about 75mins to get to lagos and then he was off to Paris.

The flight was a delight, the company was responsible for the travel expenses so he flew first class. He smiled as he thought to himself, he could get used to the nice treatment he received from the hostesses.

He heard the pilot’s voice through the speakers, asking the passengers to buckle up. They were about to land. The plane landed smoothly on the runway of Charles De Gaulle airport, one of the largest international airport in France and busiest in Europe. He proceeded on getting off the plane. After the usual hustle of getting his luggage and getting through airport security, he spotted his airport pickup. He was a young man of about the same age as him, he went over to meet him and they shook hands.

“Hi, Mr Opubo, am Francouer,” “Welcome to Paris, hope you have a good time in this beautiful city.” the man said with a french accent.

“Thanks, Francouer. I will.” Xavier said, with a smile on his face.

They took off after Francouer had finished putting the luggages inside the boot of the vehicle. On their way to the Hyatt Regency hotel which was just a five minute drive from the airport, Xavier couldn’t help but look with such amazement at the beauty of Paris. The city lights, beautiful buildings. He was yet to see other parts of Paris, but just the few places he saw on the drive to the hotel was enough to make him fall inlove with the city.

They arrived at the beautiful Hyatt Regency hotel, it was still very late in the night. But it looked like any other time, as people were checked in and baggages were taken to various rooms. The hotel was magnificient. He had never been to one so large. He couldn’t help but grin like a child that got what he wanted for christmas. The lobby was exquisitely decorated, with several exotic looking furnitures. Beautiful chandeliers, the floor patterns were awesome. He had already said goodbye to Francouer and he proceeded to the reception to check in. The receptionist welcomed him warmly and asked if he had a reservation and he answered. It didn’t take long for him to sign and his keycard was handed over to him. One of the Bell hops carried his luggage and they proceeded to get in the elevator. His room was on the fourth floor of the hotel.

They got to the fourth floor in no time and he was led to his room. After opening the door, the Bell hop kept his luggage in place and Xavier tipped him. After the guy left he was happy to be alone. He surveyed the suite, it was lovely. He laughed and plunked down on the bed. Xavier was jet lagged, so he dosed right of.

He woke up to a beautiful morning, sunlight poured into the room through the glass windows. He stood and stretched himself, before proceeding to look out the window. Xavier was awed by the magnificient sight that met him, he whistled as he basked in the loveliness of the view.

Remembering his meet with Annie Braide, he hurried to the bathroom to have his bath. He dressed and went down to the hotel restaurant to meet Annie Braide. On getting to the restaurant he was shone to her table by the Maitre D’ after he had been pleasantly welcomed.

She looked up and smiled at him as he introduced himself, boy did he look stunned at the beautiful face that looked at him from across the table. Tamar said she was pretty, but that was an understatement. She was the most beautiful lady he had ever set his eyes on, with eyes so sexy and intrigueing he could get lost in them. She had a pointed nose, full lips and a very feminine jawline. Her hair was made into a bun and he wished he could just loosen them and let them pour down.

He came back to reality at the sound of her voice, a very nice voice that he was sure would make heads turn at the sound of it. She was asking him if he was ok, and then suddenly realised that he had been staring at her and was still clutching her hands. He apologised and sat down.After a little chitchat, they ordered their food.

The menu was given to them and he let Annie pick for him and she selected a pastry named Pain au chocolat, which was made with a filling of chocolate and a cup of coffee, she liked hers with cream and he prefered his black.

During the meal they made several attempts at small talks, but it seemed awkward because Xavier couldn’t stop staring and he found it hard to come up with intelligent stuffs to say. It didn’t take long for them to finish their breakfast. Annie called the personal assistant of Aden Davies to confirm their appointment, before they both headed outside to board a cab.

Comments

comments


9 thoughts on “Love in Paris 2” by The-zenith (@The-zenith)

  1. Profile photo of topazo
    topazo (@topazo): Head Wordsmith - 58829 pts

    This fell short of my expectations… Too much telling and little showing, a chronicle rather than a story… Then there were typos too…
    Well done..

  2. Profile photo of The-zenith
    The-zenith (@The-zenith): Junior Writer - 3407 pts

    @Topazo, thanks for reading and also pointing out my mistakes. Been kinda busy this past weeks, promise to do better on the next post.

  3. Profile photo of Seun-Odukoya
    Seun-Odukoya (@Seun-Odukoya): Head Wordsmith - 103539 pts

    I think @topazo has captured the entire thing. All tell, no show. Felt like I was reading a news report.

    Hold your reader – and they; in return wouldn’t ever let you go.

  4. Profile photo of The-zenith
    The-zenith (@The-zenith): Junior Writer - 3407 pts

    Tanx @Seun-Odukoya, noted.

  5. Profile photo of Tola Odejayi
    Tola Odejayi (@TolaO): Wordsmith - 36913 pts

    @the-zenith, I won’t repeat what has been already said by @topazo and @seun-odukoya. The story sounds like an interesting one… perhaps if we heard more of what Xavier was thinking as he was in the plane… his expectations based on what he had heard of Paris, his thoughts about similar journeys he had made before, his impressions on arriving, etc., that would make the story have more feeling.

  6. Profile photo of Jefsaraurmax
    Jefsaraurmax (@jefsaraurmax): Scribe - 13549 pts

    @The-zenith, the story is promising but you need to show more and tell less. I assume you have never been to Paris by the number of times you say “beautiful” instead of describing. I was born there.If you need details, let me know.

  7. Profile photo of The-zenith
    The-zenith (@The-zenith): Junior Writer - 3407 pts

    @jefsaraurmax Tnx for reading, pls read the part3 and tell me what you think.

  8. Profile photo of Jefsaraurmax
    Jefsaraurmax (@jefsaraurmax): Scribe - 13549 pts

    @The-zenith, I like part 3.The pace is nice and the characters are starting to develop. There is a slight problem.There are no big buildings around the Louvre as it is an old part of the city. Any building from which you could see the pyramid would have to be on the “Rivoli” street and would be only few stories high. If you want a tall modern building looking at the arch next to the Louvre, you could be located in “La Defense” which is a more modern suburb but you couldn’t see the pyramid from there (because the arch would be blocking it). If you have easy access to internet, google “le Louvre” and click on the satellite map.You can see pictures of the buildings. If not, let me know and I can describe one for you. Also you need to sprinkle details of the street life here and there so people can feel like they are there. I had the same problem when I wrote “Liquid Blue” because I have never been to Nigeria so I know what it’s like.I can help you.Just tell me what you want to add. I actually walked in those streets. :-) Also try to remove the word “beautiful” completely. Think about what makes what you describe beautiful and go from there. And please remove the stripe shirt from the driver.This is a cliche. The driver will probably not be French and will not be wearing stripes. :-) Also Francouer is not a French name.I don’t know if this is on purpose but if not, change it to Fran├žois. Take care.

  9. Profile photo of The-zenith
    The-zenith (@The-zenith): Junior Writer - 3407 pts

    @jefsaraurmax tnx alot, wud definitely take you up on that. The name is french, but i misspelt it. francoeur. franc-open, generous and coeur-heart

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