I walked down the road, it was a busy boxing day people bustling around me but I didn’t see them my mind was elsewhere I walked mechanically without realizing exactly I was doing, 2012 was supposed to be my year it was supposed to be the year everything went right it did to a certain point hell it did till last week when it took a bad turn 2012 was good I can’t complain much I achieved a lot, I finished writing a book which I eventually sold for good money, I drank to my satisfaction, I partied, I was beginning to get respect from people, I had a girlfriend(or so I thought) it was all good till last week when my supposed girlfriend changed it all.

I was tipsy when I made the call, what was in my mind was breakup I was sort of fed up of the relationship she hardly had my time and I wasn’t going as planned as I envisioned it would be, I drank to get the necessary courage to do it when i talked to her it all changed I didn’t want it anymore I wanted to make this work I could the laughter from my friends  if the heard I had broken up they won’t be surprised at all, I told her I wanted a girlfriend I could see more than once a week, a girlfriend I can talk to more than 30 seconds a day but she said she couldn’t do that I asked what she could offer she said she didn’t know that I asked the question that changed everything

“How did you do it in your former relationship?”

“I am still in it” she replied

I didn’t know how I felt hearing those words I was in my illusion that I finally had a good normal relationship I cut the call left the room the party was still going on outside but drinks had finished I checked my pocket and saw some cash “rocky gold” was the only thing on my mind I saw ay and told him to escort me to rocky gold I gisted him the whole ish, the funny thing was that he jokingly said she had another boy but my mind was there “she doesn’t know who I am” I  shouted at him ‘she doesn’t ‘I insisted  I got to rocky gold and bought two bottle of harp (my first time drinking harp) I got back to the party and saw Kemi we weren’t talking but I needed her at this point so I called her over and took her to a corner “that fucking bitch has another boyfriend” I said as I hugged her my voice shaking  what should I do? i enquired from her now I was getting really tipsy “don’t worry we would talk tomorrow u aren’t in a state to talk I left her alone went to pick up my phone and call my girlfriend my voice was noticeably different this time I basically asked her to pick one of us she complained I was threating her luckily for her my credit finished I went to sleep my mind obviously in turmoil to cut the long story short we broke up she said she wanted to continue the way it was I am a proud person I can’t share my girlfriend or so I thought then that was Saturday

On Tuesday I started missing her, I knew I would I didn’t love hell I don’t think I liked her but I was still missing her , I was nice having someone to worry about, someone to think of before you sleep even if it was a façade so I called and told her we needed to talk we arranged to meet for today, the talk  I planned was to declared my undying love and ask her back even if it is on sharing formula I just needed her but it didn’t go as planned curiosity overcame me and I asked questions that I should have

Question 1- why did u say yes to me when you had a boyfriend

Answer- because you kept on disturbing me (I hear u are a

Question 2-who would you have picked

Answer- him (no surprises)

Question 3-what do you think of me

Answer- you are a cool guy (imagine my girlfriend saying that)

I ended the talk and went to meet up with nneka now uche is a different matter nneka is my soul mate the love of my life we are practically dating but not dating we act like a married couple without children we went out once but I didn’t work out so I have asked her out steady for 4 years (yes 4 years am ashamed to say it at times) everyone knows uche with me, we are supposed to be with each other, when I saw her my dark mood lifted a little when we talked I started feeling better she knows about anu so I told her about the latest she wasn’t surprised she never is with me I told I wanted her back like I always do but she said no like she always do I told her am fed up of trying with other girls officially I have had 3 relationship 1st with uche ended after a week 2nd was long distance and lasted 3 months(I never met the girl) 3rd was with my current ex and she was double dating so I obviously I had to go back to what is familiar…. uche she said no she wasn’t ready for a realtionship like she always do I kept on pestering until she said

“dolapo  I would go out with you when I feel that way about you”

Imagine that! I thought it was a forgone conclusion that we loved each other and now am hearing something different I kept on a brave face and escorted her

So here I was walking home feeling bad because 2 girls have decided to ruin my year so maybe I would lay off girl for a while am fed up with all the disappointment am trying to hard so there It was no more girls for a while that was my resolution before I saw a ping from mandy now that was another story I won’t go into but she was a prospect we had history but never dated “she has a boyfriend”  a part of my brain said “so” I replied “when would you learn” I pushed those thoughts out and answered the ping “babe how you doing”

No thoughts yet on “Rants” by damilare oso (@damilareoso)

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