Then all went wrong, there was a rumble, then a tumble. I could hear barking in the distance. My room was floating away, higher and higher it went. I look out my windows. What the fu*ck?! I am the one floating away,lower and lower.
As I touch the ground, all goes black. Its like my brain was shut down or something. And then when I awake, when I open my eyes, I see something surreal.
I find myself in what appears to be a chamber of sort. The room is dark, illuminated by candles here and there, skulls hanging in the corners. I cant make it all out, I’m not with my glasses.
“Nepa has withheld light from us”, a fine baritone voice says. I look to my feet and standing there, is a creature of some sort. Dressed in a nollywood-like suit, if you watch old Nigerian films you will know what I am talking about, the creature was like a really small man. Except that he was black of skin, with large pointy ears and two huge eyes that many girls will call cute.
He smiles at me. There is something about his smile, I can’t really say what it is, I squint at him as I try to make out his features. Damn these grandpa eyes. He notices me squinting.
“Ooh! Ur Glasses! I am terribly sorry about that, but not to worry. The boss can fix that”
Lot of things are on my mind right now. Am I dead? Is this hell? Did my mother fry that meat with weed? I think I’m gonna have a nervous breakdown, whatever that means?
“I see you are confused, don’t worry now! If I wanted you dead, you’d be dead. Come along now, we cant keep the boss waiting ”
And so the daemon leads the way, I follow, utterly ignorant as to what I am doing. My mind is too busy working out all that has just happened. I break down my current demise into small bits.
Okay, first of all, the creature said something he could have killed me, so I am alive. And this happens to be hell or something like that.
“Hey! Humm.. Excuse me sir, where am I ?”
“Oh! You are in the underworld, don’t be worried, it’s only temporary. For now” he replies as he walks on ahead.
My mind is really exploding now. Underworld! Temporary! For now! This cant be good.
“ But I read in some books that the underworld was a place of pain suffering, sorrow and stuff like that”
Now we are walking past some a scary hallway. It is dark too, infact I have noticed that everywhere here is dark, only a few candles illuminate the place. Horrible looking portraits hang from the wall, with eyes that seem to follow your every move.
Then all of a sudden, I hear screams of pain and anguish coming out of the walls, horrible sounds they were. This creature must have a twisted sense of humour, for it is at this moment that he replies my statement.
“Nah! That is rubbish! Have you seen anyone suffering? Most of them get just high on marijuana and see things”
“So who spoke on the phone?”
“It was me of course”
“But the caller spoke pidgin”
“Well I don’t know what language my message was translated into. The boundary between our two worlds acts as a translator. It translates messages into the language most understood by the receiver”
What the f*ck! So the universe believes that the language most understood by me is pidgin?! Well that explains all the results I’ve been getting in English.
We continue the rest of the walk in silence. I see things that are well, surreal, if I may say so. Then we enter a room, this room is a place of evil, I can feel it in my bones. Stalactites hang from the ceiling, dangerously sharp and slender they are. The floor is a large mass of dry bones, ribs , femurs and all. The walls are adorned with the skulls of various beast, none of them appear to be human. And then I raise my head to see it.
The throne is a swirling mass of blackness, as if the darkness has taken on a physical form. A black cloak rests in the depression of the throne. Something bad rests within the cloak, I know it. The hood is large enough to cover the face, all I see inside the cloak is more blackness. Beside the throne, a stranger sight catches my attention.
A golden bowl floats in the air, two sachets of pure water by its sides. Inside the bowl is a white substance, I look closer. No! it cannot be! I look again, squinting so hard my eye become teary. It is what I think it is. It is …..