A Breath of Fresh Air

A Breath of Fresh Air

23-02-2008

“So, how did that make you feel?”

“Well, obviously… sad. And a bit tired.”

“Tired? How do you mean?”

“Let’s face it; you have a bit too much of something and it begins to lose its initial appeal. I mean, at first, all I wanted to do was ‘go with the flow’. If the opportunity came along, I usually just took it and asked questions later. It’s not that I was boy-crazy or overly curious, it’s just that… I didn’t find the one who would inspire me to give up searching and just sit still.”

Dr. Henry looked at her over his glasses, nodding encouragingly, like every good shrink does.

“Why don’t you just keep talking till you feel better, Kate.”

She twisted her fingers and sighed deeply.

“I’ve always wanted male attention.” She laughed and looked straight at him.

“But after a while, it all got a bit… old, you know? It’s all so superficial, really. And what kills is that I regret most of the stuff I’ve done and half the time I wasn’t even enjoying it to begin with. I read this novel, and in it the girl classified guys into two; meals and snacks. The snacks are the ones you have in-between meals. They’re not really satisfying, sometimes don’t even taste that great. Maybe it’s just the wrapper that caught your eye. And then there are the meals. Satisfying. Fulfilling. Good enough to make you give up on snacks. And that’s what I feel for Mike.”

She took a big pause here, blinking rapidly and staring wide-eyed at Dr. Henry.

“Go on,” he urged.

“He’s just great, really. He can listen to me and take me seriously, give me advice, make criticisms, make me laugh… and other lovely things with his hands…”

Dr. Henry noted her smile, the laughing eyes.

“But…?”

The smile faded quickly, replaced by a mixture of fear and worry.

“But I’m so scared that now that I’ve figured out what I want, I’m so scared that he’ll be the one looking for the snacks! I guess it’s some kind of guilt thing. That I feel I must be made to pay for my past, but that’s the way I feel.”

“So, what are you going to do about your fear?”

“Well, I’ve actually made a decision, And I’m going to stand by it.”

He saw the determined gleam in her eyes and inched forward.

“Oh? What decision is that?”

“I’ve thought it all out. I’m not going to back out of this because of the fear that I’ll get hurt. If I do get hurt, it’ll be devastating, but I’ll pick myself up eventually. Life goes on. But…what if I don’t get hurt? What if this is real? It’s the principle of the glass being half full, if you ask me. Not half empty. Not at all.

“You see, I love him. And I always want to be with him, even when we’re fighting. I know that relationships these days are full of lies and deceit, but I want him, all or nothing. And I think we just might be that exception to the rule.”

For the first time in forty-five minutes, he watched Kate lean back fully, casual, at ease, yet with a calm inner strength seeping out.

“So what’s your conclusion?”

“Hmm. You see, people often tell me I act older than my age. Now I’m ready to be my age. With Mike. I’ve run away from stability for far too long. I think I’m ready to start rearing my armpit hair.”

Dr. Henry watched her laugh and couldn’t help but join in.

“So why’d you come to me? You seem to have it all figured out, you know what you want and you’re ready to go for it.”

“Well, sometimes you just need to let it all out. And it helps a lot more if your listener’s someone who doesn’t know you and won’t judge.”

“I like that.”

“So, Doc, do you think I need another session?”

“Yes, with Mike.”

“What?”

“Go ahead, and please invite me to the wedding.”

“Wedding?!”

Her laughter and childishly excited face are still fresh in his mind even after she waved goodbye and walked out.

He wishes all his cases were so damned easy.

 



31 thoughts on “A Breath of Fresh Air” by missmeddle (@missmeddle)

  1. ” I read this novel, and in it the girl classified guys into two; meals and snacks. The snacks are the ones you have in-between meals. They’re not really satisfying, sometimes don’t even taste that great. Maybe it’s just the wrapper that caught your eye. And then there are the meals. Satisfying. Fulfilling. Good enough to make you give up on snacks. And that’s what I feel for Mike.” ”

    Stole what’s left of my heart.

    Breath of fresh air indeed. The story seems to be about nothing; and yet it is so deep – so profound…I feel a lot of ladies (and guys actually) could learn a lot from this.

    Well done.

    1. That’s why na “fwesh air of breath” – errrrmm….wah did I say?

      1. @shaifamily, lol. No, there isn’t any more to it.
        *blushing crazily*
        Thanks.

    2. @Seun-Odukoya, you had me laughing at your comment; please what happened to the greater part of your heart?!
      Thanks so much.

      1. @missmeddle…

        Now that would be telling. No?

  2. Really good, but I think there should be more. Is there more?

    1. @shadiat, thanks. I’m afraid there’s no more, though! :-)

  3. @missmeddle Thank you for this. I like the way you write, as always. It was easy and pleasant to the eye. I read it till the end. And when I got there I was like “Heck!!! She didn’t stop,,,,she didn’t stop.”
    Nice story. Let me read something again soon…alright?

  4. This was indeed some fresh air. Deep insights in most of lines though there’s no real story per se. I think at the end you fumbled a bit by switching to present tense. The rest of of the post was in the past tense.

  5. This is different and deep. I really like it. It is so good that i am suspicious.

  6. Been a while since I read a prose work with gusto on naija Stories…well done

  7. kaycee why are you suspicious? well done missmeddle

  8. Very nice. What Myne said though

  9. @Myne, thanks. Yes, I know the end’s a bit wonky, but I just couldn’t bring myself to change it.

  10. @kaycee, thanks. Suspicious of what, though?
    Lolz.

  11. “Well, sometimes you just need to let it all out. And it helps a lot more if your listener’s someone who doesn’t know you and won’t judge.”

    Superb!

    For me this is about that phase of insecurity that comes with relationships and it is even more symbolic that the protagonist had to see a shrink for no obvious reason ( she seems to have her mind made up already, yet she needed some affirmation of some kind).

    I can analyse this tale for all the beautiful quirks embedded in it.
    Well done!

  12. You got it right, @midas. Thank you! :-)

  13. Being a lover of indie films, I think this will form a nice material for a short film.

    Very nice dialogue. And the comparing guys to snacks and meal bit was quite interesting.

    I totally enjoyed reading it. Keep it up.

  14. lol…Snacks and meals…now that’s a good one!

    Very deep classification that’s thought provoking.

    The story reads like part of a novel. Is it?

    1. @Afronuts, thanks! It isn’t part of a novel, though.

  15. I like the simplicity of the narration. The sincerity, I think is what Kaycee’s suspicious about; is this actually a memoir? A true story about..

    1. @markwealth erm…. Well, a lot of it is based on my emotions once upon a time, but it’s more fiction than memoir… Mostly
      Cheers!:-)

  16. I don’t really like short stories with much dialogue but this is an exception. Good story, good writing. I agree with @myne on the last line. There is nothing wrong with switching to present tense but then, ‘were’ should have been changed to ‘are’.

    1. Thank you, @omotola, point duly noted.

  17. captivating

  18. Hello @missmeddle, and everyone,
    If you’d like to LISTEN to this story do visit my blog here-> http://narratorphisayo.blogspot.com.ng/2016/04/a-breath-of-fresh-air-by-missmeddle.html
    I’m loading some of the stories I read from my Narrator days on Smooth fm Lagos.
    Please leave feedback after you listen, and email me here-> ten27media@gmail.com if you’d like me to create an audio version of your story.

Leave a Reply