So I had a really bad day. After burning my inferior but expensive brazillian hair with the flame from a candle in the name of study, the exam was nothing to write home about. I left the exam hall with gross unsatisfaction. I had two problems (i)hunger (ii) anger directed to the examiners.
Some lecturers are really wicked. My lecturer is. This man imported questions from Toronto. He forgot that back here in Nigeria we read textbooks written by Mr. Amadi who studied in one of our quack universities while Toronto pupils read texts by Theraja Theraja who studied in the great university of India. I would love to smack him behind his head but not as much as i would like to destroy Angel’s hands. The Angel in question dared to touch me while i was busy writing my exam. This man considered the exam hall, where victors are named and failures are christened the best place to chyke his student. Thank God for his gift of grace. I would have emmm, not slapped him sha but at least reprimanded him in a way. I can not shout on my lecturer. I do not want to extend this five years of torture to six or even more.
I managed to find my way to my hostel after the exam. Hungry and angry and without a means to solve both or either of the problems. I laid down on the six spring bunk i call bed. To my detriment Blessing, my beloved roomate came back full to the brim with gist and eager to off load. The hammer fell in my head once again. That was a headache. I stared at her with pleading eyes, she refused to keep quiet. She began wrangling her mouth and demonstrating with her muscles.
With zero interest i listened as she feed me with the latest gist. I would have preferred food to gist.
“Imagine, Mr Amadi asked me to sleep with him”.
Mr Amadi? That was my lecturers name. When did Engineering dudes start lecturing Masscom pupils?
“My lecturer.” She specified.
“Oh! I for say o. So when are you guys doing it or have you slept with him already?”
She ignored my question as she completed her undressing operation. I expected her to christen me ewu. She did.
“Ewu. He said he likes me and has had his eyes on me for a while now. I shouldn’t be stressing myself with reading his course as he is ready to give me an ‘A’ after he beds me”
It was the popular story of every female student in the university. My lecturer had said so to me too, the likes of Angel. I turned on my bed. I needed something to distract my mind from hunger. I hoped on Sleep but it evaded me. I stood up, opened my locker and brought out the bag of ijebu garri mama had given to me when i was returning to school. It was the only provision i had remaining. I inhaled in appreciation as i poured out some sweet smelling garri into a bowl.
“Blessing please do you have sugar?” She frowned. I had not yet reacted to her little tale. Nevertheless she turned to her locker and brought out a pack of St Louis.
“How many cubes do u want?”
“Four”. I walked down to her corner and recieved the cubes.
“So, what are you gonna do about Mr Amadi?”
“I told him he was too old for me. He is even older than my father. Besides i cannot stoop so low to sleep with my lecturer for high grades. I will feel very bad about it and be ashamed of the grade beccause i didn’t earn it.
“Story. I was familiar with that line too. I returned to my already soaked garri. It was swollen.
FACT: Blessing is a runs girl i.e someone who sleeps with old and ugly Alahajis for money and connection.