If facing the skies the fish cannot heaven see.
Scientists sky-rocket and yet nothing see
The tail looks like moonlight tale
How could I see you without that long sleep?
Ending a man in the invisible realms of the tale?
High above the skies they say you are
Even the flying birds cannot see you
Above the cloudy smoke of sky settles you
Vary comfortable like the king you are
Every day we crave for you
Not death to sea but you just you.
Rooming myriads of men with wings
Eerie invincible white men like kings
Aren’t there ebony black men that you keep?
Little shall we know until we sleep?
I get the generally idea, but it was confusing in some parts.
Nice.
thanks
Hey! @seun-odukoya was asking for some general idea – even a two liner would help. :) Abi?
hmmmn. Nice one with the flow. Nice one with the acrostic. Me too, I want to see God. As for the long sleep, abeg, not yet.
thanks for the read bro
Hahahaha. Enjoyed it.
Uhmmmmm, I dunno sha.
every body wants to go to heaven where we shall see God- well it will be in His own time – good work the reality of heaven is well spelt out
[Vary] comfortable like the king you are- is that meant to be “very”?
Good issue.
[Vary] comfortable like the king you are- is that meant to be “very”?
Good issue.
maybe, thanks for pointing that out but i cant really remember what i intended to say in that poem. it was written years ago
maybe! Thanks for pointing that out but i cant really remember what i intended to say in that poem. It was written years ago
Among other things, ‘The tail looks like a moonlight tale’? Haba! Do give thoughts on that. Looks ‘fishy’ :)
Different poems evoke different messages to the reader – that is the beauty of that genre. The varying tales rendered from the compactness. Everyone sees going to see the Almighty from your lines. I saw different. I saw nature, beauty, and life in varying shades. I saw philosophical ponderings and at some point, a thoughtful musing on the thoughtlessness and issues of living.
Oh well… Sometimes even we the parents of these pieces write something and discover later that they bring us something totally different.
I would ask a little reworking… but on the whole, well done Adams. Well done.
thanks bro