Pretty Eyes

Oh ‘em pretty eyes,
First glimpse caught a at the train station,
Silently they beckoned,
Tendrils of a plea,
Come to me…
Take away this lonesome…
Be the love I seek…
Say you are the man to make me complete…
But fear clasped my feet,
Chained to its walls was my tongue,
And just like it never was,
The moment passed.
In regret I look back and long
And in my head the question rages on,
Will I ever see those pretty eyes again!?



8 thoughts on “Pretty Eyes” by RuuD (@ruud68)

  1. Nice, nice, nice.

  2. Simply nice…I like..Well done…$ß

  3. looool , sounds like you are relating a very personal experience :) Hope you see that girl at the station again…lol !

    I like that it is short and simple, well done :)

    1. Very nice.

      No long thing.

  4. I like this. It’s simple, pure and original.

  5. @ruud68, forget it, you wont see those pretty eyes again; you lost your chance man. nice one. hehehehehehe.

  6. shai (@shaifamily)

    In my experience@RuuB u blew it. If u re lucky u might. But, the odds are that in 9 out of 10 chances like dt (especially in a crowded/anonymous place like that) you have lost that chance forever.

    Back to the meat of the matter, I like your piece. Nice, sharp words that convey what they are meant to.

    I ran into a ditch somewhere tho

    ” Come to me…
    Take away this lonesome…” – Lonesome? Is dt complete the way it is???

    And again, the switch between looker and the lookee (this is poetry, it’s allowed)

    Silently they beckoned,
    Tendrils of a plea,
    Come to me…
    Take away this lonesome…
    Be the love I seek…
    Say you are the man to make me complete…

    I was finking if you made these lines stand alone on their own, separated from the ones above and below (italics work too) would av worked wonders.
    Just my thots. They ramble on and on….

    Ps: U did well.

  7. You’ll find another set of pretty eyes somewhere else. Forget the former. Nice poem.

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