Crux Of The Cross

Crux Of The Cross

CRUX OF THE CROSS

Darkness ravaged the land

Stealing away in cloaked garb…

Spoils and coffers of wordly sins

In the deadness of mortal wits…

Purloined, the world is bereft

of the temple’s veil and the altar’s banquet

 

 

Dignity-raped, he stumbled

On shackled feet he fumbled

Befuddled by the bloody tears

Whipped astride justice mare

What miscarriage in Pontius’ court !

Angels howled in taunting mount

 

 

Bloodbath at Calvary close

Redemption at Christ’s woes

Surging brook from the saviour’s pore

Ardent passion for the world’s cause

Not my will but yours be done

On ladened shoulder, the brunt he bore…

 

Finding Wole-Fash



22 thoughts on “Crux Of The Cross” by midas (@midas)

  1. Not sure about this as a whole. Some lines really shined, while others are so-so.

    Please edit and add the missing articles, as well make the tenses consistent.

    1. Thanks @Myne: I dug this from the archive of “gone-by” days and decided to leave it the way it was. I understand the so-so lines, the missing articles is what I don’t get. I’d be happy if you’ll expantiate on this.

      1. Stealing away in {a} cloaked garb…

        Whipped astride justice{‘s} mare

        Angels howled in {a} taunting mount

        ______

        Above are some examples. When you use singular, like garb or mount, it is better to add an article like a or the before it to give the sentence a better structure.

        1. Thanks @myne: I get the drift better now. i think the articles got lost in transit somewhere along the way. Thanks again.

  2. ditto Myne’s response

  3. Err…kind of like it stumbled it’s way to the end…

    1. @ Seun-Odukoya: you think?

  4. this piece suffers from the allergy of the ‘tad-pole’ syndrome…..

    1. what’s the allergy of the “tad-pole” syndrome @yhemie
      Would like to know.

  5. My only issue with this is the tense in the 1st stanza..besides that I like the poem, because U tried to put Christ’s sufferings in lines and tell us the reason for the season…Spirit of easter huh?..Well done.

    P.S..wouldn’t it be better if you put the lines according to the way they went…he got flogged and all b4 d curtain tore..2nd stanza wld come b4 d 1st that way…*just thinking*

    1. @Bubbllinna: I guess the brevity of it kinda left out some elements and it doesn’t help either that it was written on the spur of the moment. i understand the chronological arrangement you recommended. that’s a brilliant idea!

  6. This is about Christ shey? But my guy, e get as e be o. Why the ellipsis at the end of some of those lines?

  7. Finding wole- fash?
    That’s part of the poem abi?

    1. @kaycee: that was a gaffe on my part. Not part of the poem, more like a sign-off.:)

  8. I like the poem. It is cool to me.

    1. thanks @gooseberry. it was a thrill writing this.

  9. make sense. i njoy d poem

    1. i’m glad u enjoy it @clemency

  10. I enjoyed the sense it made, about the structuring and other flaws, take note of preceding comments.

    1. I’ll be sure to take notes. I’m glad u got the gist

  11. The first stanza need restructuring,,

    nice title.

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