The Sweetness Of The Burden Of Motherhood

The Sweetness Of The Burden Of Motherhood

Today’s world gives little credence to mothers or people. Many times, they are just there. Other times, we remember them and send some word: ‘Hey Mum, thanks’…Or maybe we remember we have a caring mum…and forget. Many mothers aren’t really the traditional mothers we used to know. Forgive me, I am African and know that no matter who a lady is or decides to be, there should be something they stand for to their children. I have experienced different ladies – both career and non-career alike trying to show this. With some ladies, you know what motherhood is…I have come down a line of several strong mothers who have made me honour them each day. I feel blessed. And it marvels me.

You see several women ‘carry’ children despite evils or whatever challenges for several months. The child comes and they suffer to raise the child up. Some, like my mum, sacrificing a lot of what might have been a very promising career. Not that this makes them lazy. No! Usually, most find some job to do. I have a million stories to tell but one comes to mind. It is of a struggling mother who came back in the a.ms from a night shift at work. She saw her son shivering from a convulsion. The woman who had dragged herself in, totally exhausted with sleep on her eyes picked the boy and backed him. She walked several kilometres to the nearest hospital which wasn’t ‘near’. At some point, they saw Muslims taking their dead to go bury. He uttered: ‘Mummy, sometimes, I wish I would die and leave you in peace so that you would stop suffering for me like that.’ That mum wept. The boy lived and writes this piece today. It took me long years to grow and discover what I see as the sweetness of the burden of motherhood.

Talking of the sacrifice of motherhood, I begin to think of how the times are changing and people are looking for one excuse or the other to forget to love…their own children!! C’mon! Love is in the sacrifice! I should mention here that I have lost most of my loved ones lately and found most of my friends losing theirs too. At this time, I and most of these people try to immortalise said people by putting up their pictures as Display pictures, Profile Pictures, Avatars and the like. We try to write poems and things like that, raise memorials, testimonies and all. The question is would they (our dead ones) know? Would they be honoured? Maybe, maybe not. We can only guess. It gets worse when these people didn’t really know what they meant and how great they were thought of.

This reminds me of a cousin of mine, Mimi Bossua, who dedicated her whole Facebook page to me on my birthday without my knowledge. It made me realise that no matter where we are at any one time, there is somebody somewhere loving us and wishing us well, praying things go well with us – whether we know it or not. Many times, we don’t. Imagine perhaps that I had passed on without knowledge of the post? I wouldn’t have felt that honour. So, I decided to change and honour those I cherish and speak up on those values I hold. After all, an Aunt, Shiga once said: ‘Gone are the days when people used to only praise the dead. These days, we praise the living once they are in the right so that when they are in the wrong, we can also lash them.’ Thus, this tribute is for the several mothers I know from my mother, to Mrs. Mbatomun Shango, the Shango sisters from big DY through to Msugh and Mimi who does it for so many kids, to @Ukamaka Osakwe who has written so much on the love of a mum, @Jefsaraurmax, @Tora and to the person who inspired this piece, Mrs. Hembadoon Angela Itakpe.

***

I smile when I see one of the perfectest examples in the strong and courageous Hembadoon Angela Itakpe, who put her life on hold that her children’s might go on. A competent Architect, this lady took the option of home maker, putting a whole career on hold. All to ensure that her two children get the best of childhood. Yes, she has the support of a great and loving man, Mr. Joe Itakpe but Nope, she aint lazy! She got to doing a few other businesses that an Architect would laugh at. But that is the pride, she does it all with laughter because she knows that her foundation would be the perfect gift for her children who are growing greatly.

As I salute Aôndo (the Almighty) for another year of this great lady, I celebrate someone who’s worth can hardly ever be quantified in a few words. For every single thing you do for those children, for being the great lady you are, for being my dearest sister and good friend + much more, I can only say Hembadoon Angela Itakpe live long and may your years be far far far greater…Best wishes today and forever more. And to all other women out there, in a world getting worse by the day, we need more Mums, not just biologically but in all ways. Guys you aint left out, honour these ladies and be Dads much as you can…single guys? Haba! Okay, single guys and ladies be the best and make each second count.

Best wishes, S’

 



16 thoughts on “The Sweetness Of The Burden Of Motherhood” by Sueddie Agema (@sueddie)

  1. So touching.
    You have my respects.
    I remember my mother, I haven’t thought of her in a while.
    We take these women for granted.
    Respect to all mothers!

    Let me call my mum!

    1. Say that again, You “take these women for granted”… go and sin no more!

      1. @adaobiokwy: Hee hee hee…Matron!
        @Kaycee: Thanks. Respect…respect. No more words.

  2. Mothers are the shit. No disrespect.

    Witnessed child birth once. It was her first time – and I vividly remember her screaming and promising not to ever have sex again – not to have another child again (not to mention mangling my right hand)…all up till the child came. A daughter.

    At the first sight of her daughter…she went quiet. And then she smiled, a brilliant smile that made me hide my face…and held the little thing and kept cooing and cooing and cooing…

    Mothers. Incredible.

    Napoleon told me; ‘God could not do everything so He created mothers’.

    I agree.

    Nice one Su’Eddie.

    1. @Seun .. all this Napoleon gist…Haba…na wa o!
      Your story is it the story of your lady? Like you got a child? That is really nice…Nice.
      Thanks man…oshe!!

  3. Has she read this?..I sure hope so..This is so beautiful and touching..
    Mothers do a lot and are usually taken for granted half the time..
    What women go through 4 their kids..no be beans.
    Nice one Master Su’..and U know d ancients are proud of U..Well done!

  4. Mothers, mothers, mothers. It’s a special calling, you know.

    1. @Sibbyl: Na gode sosai!! I think she read it…Really wish I could get through to most of the mothers I know. When I mentioned
      @jefsaraurmax in the post, I meant it along with @osakwe ukamaka and @tora…there are many others including @babyada
      I got most of the notes they wrote on motherhood from various fora here on NS and a few of some on FB…
      @babyada: I totally agree! Blessed are those who agree!
      @adaobiokwy: hmm…that looks like ‘Okay…now I would ensure I get that baby!!’ :)
      @Sibbylwhyte: Thanks.

      1. @agema, Gee thanx. Wondering how you knew I was a mother though.

  5. Awwwwwww. *sniffing*. This is like…. I’m just short of words. Thanks for acknowledging us. many more years to the mothers around the world… And for we the aspiring mothers, many more years to us too.

    God bless you for writing this, bless the readers for reading and bless those who haven’t seen but still love their mothers.

  6. Sure enjoyed this, it makes me appreciate women for their kind hearted ways. If not for my sisters and mother’s constant love and encouragement, how lonely would I have felt.

    But then I still appreciate daddy sha for his words of wisdom and tough discipline.

    So thoughtful of you to share this my man!

  7. Very touching Sueddie, I hope she reads this. I appreciate good mothers a lot, cuz I know I cannot do what they doing. Thumps up to all the good mums and thumps up to you too for this wonderful piece.

    1. @gooseberry: thanks…sniffing at your sniffs too…Shei you see as both of us be kpako, abi? Hee hee hee…
      May all the blessings you have given us bring you lots of more blessings too and lots more…thanks.
      @Dowell : Na gode dan uwa na…my brother…Sure we can’t forget our fathers. Interestingly, I posted something on dad only
      yesterday that you might want to look at http://sueddie.wordpress.com
      @ablyguy: Thank you very much…Thumbs up to you for the head swelling thumbs up!
      @laworemike: I am grateful that you took time to write your compliment. Thank you.

  8. i love this story… a very good one

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