Akpako Leaders

I was reading the papers the other day and I found it just impossible to avoid or ignore all the election excitement that had so razed the country. From page one to the last, it was all about the elections. ‘See naija o!’ I said to myself. I had never seen Nigerians so excited in any election year. Let me say here that I am by no means a ‘political animal’ (in thick igbo intonation) as some of my useless ‘igbotic’ friends from uni would say; whatever that means, neither am I interested in politics of any colour.

However, this years one really struck a chord with me and I’ve decided to write about it. Well, as I was reading the paper, it suddenly dawned on me and I said to myself ‘but wait o! Who really are the leaders of this very tomorrow wen no dey gree reach sef?’ If you noticed, a lot of things happened with this years election. Serious money was spent as never before, I had never seen the ‘youths’ so involved, Suddenly GEJ had started to feel like Obama, and the Naija where dem born me had started to feel like America. You go fear Naija people calling for change.

The TV adverts sef na dem burst my head pass. One governorship aspirants campaign advert looked no different from a hollywood movie. GEJ’s too. Oh! So they suddenly woke up and realised ‘hey Nigeria has ‘youths’ o! Let’s get them to vote for us. I know they’ll be chuffed’. You’ll notice that I’ve put the youths in quote where ever mentioned. It simply begs the question that has so prompted me to write this.

Who exactly are these ‘youths’ that these people are calling ‘Leaders of tomorrow’? That twat rallied every young musician he could find in the country to sing him a campaign song; from M.I to Dbanj, everyone was on the train. Actors and actresses went and wasted their talents copying Obama’s Tv ad campaign concept word for word. ‘Listen to the voices of a million people calling for change…..’ Seriously???? For this Naija???? Which change?? Kai!! Well the adverts were sweet sha. Me I sang along sef. ‘Nigerian youths! You are the leaders of tomorrow, come out and vote us in if you want change.’ Me vote for you? Your papa eeeeee! Call me crazy o! But make una think am na.

Has it ever occurred to you that when our leaders say that the ‘youths’ are the leaders of tomorrow, they are actually referring to themselves? Walahi! If not when will the youths ever get a crack at it? No seriously! Ever since I was born, the names Obj, Yaradua (late), Buhari, Gowon, Atiku, Babangida just to name a few, have resonated in my ear. So which youths do they mean exactly? As one person rules, some other idiot that ruled some 20 years ago as a military officer suddenly wakes up one day, yawns and decides ‘I feel like ruling again jare. Afterall my money don finish! Make I baff go buy presidential ticket for oby store’. Afterall 20 years don tey na abi? ‘Vascad a pool'(in hausa intonation)~Bastard a fool. These people no dey die sef? The power just keeps going round and round in their circles. As GEJ goes in now, you can bet that Buhari or some Babangida who ruled more than 20 years ago is probably getting set to contest the next election.

Say Babangida for example then contests and manges to win the next election any however and gets in, GEJ sef go dey prepare to enter power again in the next 20 or so years granted he’s alive. Then after that Buhari sef go like try him luck again.

Its pathetic and very laughable really.Well, youths as I’ve come to observe, are classified into two in nigeria hehehe. We have the under 20 youths and the over 50 youths (Buhari dem).’Cos na dem be the leaders of tomorrow. They’ve been leading even before I was born and they’re still leading. Abi we sef we no dey grow ni? Lol. And then pastors sef had the effrontery to join in the stupidity. Lemme not even start on their matter.

Our own better sha o!. Libya dem nko? Lol. They have a youth that has been leading them for some forty years now, and the youth has simply refused to age or die. The youth is over 60. Chai Chineke! LWKMD! Half the Libyan population don grow pass their youth and they’re still waiting for their tomorrow. Meanwhile that bros still hold power. Wetin him go dey tell him youths na? ‘Make una relax first I go soon finish’ abi? Some youths are wicked o! Walahi! Lol…



6 thoughts on “Akpako Leaders” by Jimi (@Jimi)

  1. Thats the story of our times oh…
    God help us, yeah those ads rankled me too good one!

  2. You discussed a very cogent issue here but I have issues with you not deciding between writing in plain English or Pidgin. You may combine both, yes, but creatively without insulting writing.
    And yes, I had issues with the ads too and the watery campaign thrusts, but then, this is Nigeria. Until we get ‘there’, we would have to put up with ‘here’.
    Jimi, nice.
    Banky

  3. You took me back to those election days, there were some catchy campaigns sha, but na ads go develop Nigeria?

  4. I agree. But, that term wey U use for ya friends sef…’igbotic’…

  5. You STILL could have made your point(s) without using such derogatory terms for your IGBO friends….It was a turn off!!!

  6. Na wa o! How come everyone’s ignorong the point I’m trying to make and picking out the ‘igbotiic’ part of it only? I didn’t mean it to be as condescending as u ppl are taking it oh, and if it means anything me I be proper igbo boy from Abia state. I only meant it 2 describe the way they spoke

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