Okiribiti: The Master Quipster

Okiribiti: The Master Quipster


Lets talk about Okiribiti
the boy who can eat four loaves of agege bread without drinking tea.
He attends Iyanfigiro grammar school
and there girls of all grades he woos
though just a neophyte
Who can’t even label a chloroplast.

Last christmas,
He ate rice amass
but still he sneaked into his mama’s kitchen
to purloin a piece of chicken.
The poor fowl had been named Kalu
for it was as big as an Emu.

Head oscillating between the door and pot,
Okiribiti picks a lap steamingly hot.
He got his index finger hurt
and he did blurt
‘Yeeehhhh’ in mute
For he dared not alarm his loot.
His soup-stained Index finger cooled in his salivated mouth
taking time to take out.

He picks a 4-pronged fork
To aid his thieving work.
Sadly, the lap got forked
The moment 6 clocked.
The grandfather clock began to sing-song its coda
and mama awoke from her evening siesta.
Foreboding dawned
for he was sure mama would have started her yawn.

He hastily chewed the hot lap between his lips
but some oil unawares slid on his zip.
He covered the pot with the lid
and hoped mama would not know what he did.
He tip-toed to the door
but his eyes sored
When he mama saw
a coaxial cable clutched in her paw.

Okiribiti let out a belch
with an acrid stench.
He would soon start to prevaricate
though he knew mama would infuriate.
Mama asked quietly ‘what have you done
here alone?’
But Okiribiti is a maestro of mendacity
out-witting the masters of skeptical methodology.
”i just came to get a cup of water”
was his answer.
Mama could see untruth
beneath the face of this youth.
His mother pummelled him without further ado
and moaning was all he could do.
”how did that oil stain your zip
you master of quip?”
Mama said amidst wallops
without as much stops.
”i don’t know,
maybe its from the citrus juice”
Mama continued to administer
Lashes on her quipster.
”okay okay. I will confess,
I will fess.
I just found my phalanges purloining a meat
and i swear, it’s the devil’s feat”

5 thoughts on “Okiribiti: The Master Quipster” by Olaniyi Olayemi (@OlaniyiOlayemi)

  1. Nice story,good rhymes

  2. Folakemi Emem-Akpan (@Folakemi)

    good good. well done

  3. @OLANIYIOLAYEMI. Lol……really funny and written well.

  4. Kosnie (@Kosnie)

    Hilarious. Nice .well written

  5. ivie9ja (@Ivie9ja)

    Teehee lol good one my husband and I were just talking about stealing meat from the pot lol Abomination lol

Leave a Reply