Beautiful Colors of Sin: 29

With Brenda gone, Sean became a shadow of himself. The only thing that kept him sane was his son.
Sola saw his father come into the sitting room with Simisola. He jeered and staggered towards them, his hands stretched out in front of him. He got halfway and stopped. Simisola stood a few steps away; she wanted the little boy to walk farther to meet her. Sean made to carry him but Simisola told him not to.

“Don’t wear him out. You know what we did to start him to walk after two years,” Sean maintained and tried to pick his son up. The little boy ignored him and continued walking unsteadily towards Simisola.

“I rest my case,” Sean said and sat down to watch the two of them.

Sola eventually got to where Simisola was standing and she picked him up and threw him up in the air. Simisola sat down and used her fore finger to open his eyes wide. She peered into it and stretched out his palm.

“Is he okay?” Sean asked, “I need to be sure”

“He is fine. You are my doctor and you know he is fine,” Simisola replied.

“I know but I just wanted a different opinion,” Sean replied and took his son. Paullina came in and placed a can of juice in front of Simisola and took Sola from Sean’s hand. Sean tickled him as he handed him to Paullina and Sola started to giggle.

“I talked to Dr. Hansen and they have agreed that you can join them,” Simisola said and sipped her juice, “Are you sure about this?”

Sean nodded and got up from his seat. He went to their family picture; Brenda was smiling like she had no worries in the world as she held tightly onto Sola who seemed to be going for the camera. Sean had, since Brenda’s death got tired of living in the house alone with nobody but Paullina. He felt Brenda’s absence everyday and it was beginning to affect him mentally and emotionally. It had been a year since she died and he could still feel her presence in the house.

It was great timing when the news came to their hospital that UNAID needed doctors in Abuja. It came at a time when he was tired of staying in Lagos; he didn’t find the city enjoyable anymore. Abuja was their dream city. They were already thinking of going there when Brenda started getting sick. They had gone their three times and had really fallen in love with the place. I had objected at first but reasoned with him when he explained the reason why he had to relocate.

Simisola and I had contacted some people we knew at Abuja and an accommodation was found, a three bedroom bungalow and he was to leave in three days. He turned and faced Simisola.

“Aunty Simisola, I am grateful for all you did when Brenda passed. It is importantly that I leave this city,” Sean said and Simisola nodded in compliance. Paullina came back into the sitting room with tearful Sola in her hands.

“Dada! Dada!” he cried and stretched out his hand.

“Sola, you are still crying like a baby,” Simisola commented and took Sola from Paullina, “You have spoilt this boy, Sean.”

“Me? You and my sister did that. He is two years old and can’t even speak well,” Sean replied and smiled.

Simisola placed Sola on her laps and started to make funny faces at him.
“I wonder what Uncle Simon is saying to all these,” Sean said and smiled.

“Don’t even start. Simon knows I am a good mother,” Simisola replied.

“How is that friend of his? The one that had problems with his wife,” Sean asked, looking all serious.

“His name is Kunle. He is okay now, I think. He is full of regrets for his actions now, but I don’t see any hope of reconciliation. The wife feels much cheated,” Simisola replied.

“I don’t blame her. It is a very depressing thing. Some people are not appreciative of what they have,” Sean said and shook his head.

Sola started tugging at his father’s trousers and he knew it was time for his nap. He carried him and took him to the room while Simisola prepared to leave.



11 thoughts on “Beautiful Colors of Sin: 29” by Tai Fasina (@Tai)

  1. @Tai, is this not getting too long? Anyway, you seem to have your way around words and this is just unfolding beautifully.

    Well done!

    1. Hahaha. Do you read Dean Kontz? I tend to write huge stories. But when this turn into a hard copy, there will be a lot of editing.

      Thanks for the comment. One more chapter to go and on to the next series.

      1. @Tai, that’s good to know. I just hope to get a free copy when the hard copy is finally out…inviting to check out the second episode of the series I’m trying to write at http://www.naijastories.com/2014/07/boss-wife-episode-2/ and comment, good or bad, maybe you could share your writing secret with us :)

  2. Very interesting read, been following it from the beginning. However, it appears that there is something wrong with the plot of the story. There has been a number of climaxes and resolutions which is alright but these need to be knit together properly so instead of the reader anticipating the end of the story, they are left wanting for more. Care needs to be taken with how the characters are developed. For instance where on earth is Marvin?

    I’m not a writer, just a reader and this is a great story but needs a bit of work to help readers glide through each character’s story easily. I think checking out some of Danielle Steel’s books will help you achieve that. Note the way she develops the plot and her characters such that even when she moves from one to the other, readers are still captivated.

    Well done though, looking forward to seeing your book. And I hope you find this useful.

    1. Thanks @ladybella: this was my first attempt at writing and I van only get better. When the sequel starts, a lot will become clearer. Thanks for reading and I did find the comment very useful.

  3. Okay, am still here o.

    1. Thanks ufuoma for reading on.

  4. This is your first attempt @Tai?
    I had no idea. Well done.
    I see you like writing ‘big’ stories too.

    I like how you handled Sean’s grief. Good work.
    I have to say something about the pov issue though. It is odd to read a story with a first and third pov in the same chapter/episode. I think @afronuts mentioned that a few episodes back.
    I think you should consider writing in third person so you can have multiple viewpoints in future. It makes it easier if you are writing about many characters whose lives interwine. Your narrative will flow better. You can have a third person voice telling the story of Mrs A and Mr B. We wouldn’t wonder how they know what’s happening with the other person then because you change voice with each character.
    Please forgive me for waffling.
    I look forward to more from you. As explosive as this.
    Well done.

    1. Okay. Noted, I can only be better. I like multi characters and many faceted stories. *smiles* thank you. Third person in multi characters is a good one. Duly noted.

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