On School And Classes [Hysteria 4]

– Books Don’t Suck, Schools Do – – Hymar

” It is not where you graduated from or what you graduated with, it is what graduates out of you that really counts.” – – Someone.


“How do you cope in class? ”

That’s the most frequent question I get asked by people I am just getting to know. They think that I am not supposed to be in school. They think someone with my hearing defects. Someone who can’t even speak clear has no business in the University of Benin. They think I should be on some loud and crowded street somewhere in Lagos with a sign on my neck that says I AM DEAF AND DUMP PLEASE HELP ME WITH ANY ASISTANT YOU CAN.

” I dey use juju,” that is what I would say as I resist the impulse to walk away, reminding myself they didn’t know my story.

Reminding myself it is just society at work in them. A society that looks down on queers and the odd couple.

A society that understands an alimajiri on the street corner, but frowns at him when he drags his rags to class to learn something about that bitch called Life.

Sometimes I tell them how.

Sometimes I don’t. I let them think what they want. I let them wonder if I have rich parents pulling the strings and nothing upstairs. I let them wonder if I have a torrent of carry overs and failed tests. I let them think. Why not, God gave them that pea-sized thing in their heads. Let them use it.

My father never asks me that question. My mother doesn’t give a fuck. Her baby was in school and nothing else matters now that she can shut Mama TJ’s big mouth. My big sister looks me strange sometimes. I know she wonders how her favourite brother copes in that faraway place notorious for Confra shootouts, runs girls, bad men and fine boys(of the last, I am one. Hahahahah).

I told my sister the truth. Sometimes when I am in class, I daydream. I think of lines, draw smileys to pass to Bridget and make her giggle. I compose poems, I Facebook. I look around and wonder. I wonder what it is in their world. With sounds.

But then, that is me. Even before I lost my hearing at seven years, I have always been a dreamer. Not exactly a Joseph. My dreams are scarier. The actors in these dreams were bogeymen, scarecrows, masquerades, WWF’s(now WWE) Kamala, the bojuboju man, and of course, Peter Parker and Robocop to the rescue.

In my first year, I made eight A’s. I didn’t even have a D let alone E or F(for Fabulous). Yeah. A 2.1 rocks. People ask how I did it, I look them funny when I read that on their lips and tell them to go and google up the shit. Shebi computer fit tell you anything?

And in my second year, it was a flop. I didn’t even get an A, too many C’S, D’s and two Fabulous(lol) signs on my result. People ask me what happened? Well, I tell them, life happened. I just have to live it.

Or leave it.

Yeah, Fuck everything and run. Knot a rope. Pop a pill. Jump a bridge. Bite a bullet. Blast a brain. Hello darkness, how far na?

But Hymar David is no quitter. My girlfriend of two years( sweetest, nicest and most loving heart you ever saw) always tells me I am the stubbornest idiat she has ever seen. I laugh at that, I don’t deny I am hard of head as I am of hearing. It helps me not to get it broken when life starts raining pebbles.

I know I haven’t really answered the question in your mind, HOW DO YOU COPE IN CLASS? How come your result in the second year just didn’t point to the same person who had a 2.1 in his first year?

I will only answer one question and that would be the latter.

My second year flop came because I just didn’t care enough. I prefer to daydream in class than to make notes. I just didn’t see how my life could boil down to just one scrap of paper some crackpot call a degree. I didn’t see the sense in what we call education today. How are these courses going to impact positively on me? My idea of education is something that changes you. Something that becomes a part of you and not just something you have to strain to get in your head just because you need to remember something when they pass the question paper.

That isn’t my idea of education. I would rather enroll in Life’s School of Hard Knocks. One semester there is equal to five years in Harvard. Plus they don’t go on strike there…giggles.

As for the first question, hmm one day, my friends.

One day.

14 thoughts on “On School And Classes [Hysteria 4]” by Hymar (@Hymar)

  1. get that degree first o….at least for the sake of mama…so that mama T.J wont rat her mouth again…whatever is worth doing is worth doing well. you have it in you

  2. Lol.@Topazo. Thanks. I will get it. Trust me.

  3. Wow! I’ll have to get to the previous posts.
    You write funny. Ramble-like. It’s cool, makes for an interesting memoir.
    Topazo said it all – do it well.

    There are some errors in this, so reread, and clean it up.

    Well done, boogeyman. $ß.

  4. Laughing,@sibbylwhyte, I guess I kinda developed that recently tho u sure may find traces in the previous posts if u care to go back. Oopsy, on the errors, I will clean up madam. It might interest u to know I actually posted Sundown pt 4 but for some reason, this was posted instead. Thankyhu, Thankyhu, I always keep coming online to check if u done R&R my posts…winks….

  5. Aww.. Sweet.

    Fuck everything and run. Knot a rope. Pop a pill. Jump a bridge. Bite a bullet. Blast a brain. Hello darkness, how far na?… This was my best paragraph.
    Going to the others. Waiting for Sundown.

  6. @sibbylwhyte. Trying hard not to blush. U don’t have to wait long before the sun goes down tho….winkee…

  7. Wow, @hymar…this is some really lovely shit. You killed over here, And yes i agree with @sibbylwhyte on two things, the free-flow, almost rambling style gave this story heart and that paragraph and the one after it, were supremely beautyful. Now, i got you in my sights, going to be looking out for your works. Well done boss

    P.S.: Aint gonna be asking how you are coping with school, gonna be asking how serene a world without sound is, You aint missing much, i tell you – lots of sound and fury over here, signifying less than nothing.

  8. @ayomitans…whew, you got me blushing with gleeeeeee. Thankssss. Oh yeah, I love bring in the midst of so much chaos yet not affected by it. But then……winks…

  9. @elovepoetry, what can be more awesome than all your kind comments? What can be more awesome than NS? Thanks. I appreciate.

  10. You make me remember J. D Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye. Good “Rambling” story here

  11. Thanks @kodeya, I will check that book out sef. Nice to know my piece evoked fond memories.

  12. @hymar, I can’t drop a comment on Hysteria 5. Why na? Send a message to @admin or @ogaoga. They would rectify it and turn on the comment box, unless you wanted it thus, though I doubt that.

  13. @Hymar: I like your take on academic degrees because I think like that too. Sometimes, I feel that some people dnt need to acquire a degree to be deemed competent in some areas of life! Because there are really smart, intelligent people out there who dnt need to sit in a classroom and who actually DO NOT like school or need it to be successful and/or enlightened.

    Unfortunately, getting degrees and sitting in classrooms are mandatory for the world to prove one’s relevance and the ticket to acceptance.

    Back to the actual write up…… I highlighted a few errors both grammatical and otherwise but seeing as this write up was almost a year old you must have re-read and made corrections.

    Notwithstanding, I really like your writing style and flow, almost effortless and easy to get into. I also absolutely like your sense of humor…..a bit cynical and sarcastic.

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