A suicide note means a lot, it is possibly the last message you would receive from a dead person, but sometimes you wonder if you really want to know, I have thought about a suicide note a lot of times but not suicide itself, I feel a suicide note would convey messages I would like to pass across to my friends and family that I normally can’t say to their faces, I have a lot on my mind to say, if am to write a suicide note now it would be about 3 foolscap pages long, to numerous people I’ll like to pass a lasting message to, a way to finally say what is on my mind without any repercussion to, some would be words of encouragement, some would be advice for the future, some others would be curses and swears.
A suicide note has a lot of weight, I have thought of the reaction people would have when they read my suicide note, couple of people would be shocked about what I wrote, shocked I had those sort of thoughts about them, but my suicide note would be too harsh I definitely won’t want people killing themselves after reading it. I have thought of the things I would tell my parents, my sister, my best friend, my first love who continually shunned my advances, my last love who made me feel like love was nothing, my younger cousins who are like my siblings and who look up to me, to the people who abandoned and forgot about me when it was wrote, to the people who encouraged and inspired me, to the people that stole from me and laughed with me later like nothing happened, to the current girl in my life who I like so much but people don’t believe and think it’s just because of the sex. Those are basically the people that would be included in the note, some people might be insulted for not being in the note, others relived, but that’s their problem, the people in the note are those I feel would understand the weight in the my words.
My note won’t have names It would be written as a sub, it would be left to the reader to determine who is who in the note. The good thing about this note is that it doesn’t exist am not offing myself anytime soon, so don’t hold your breath waiting to read it, it is all in my head ever changing because people change, people who inspire me today may bring me down tomorrow, that first love that has continually shunned me may finally realize how much I love her, a lot changes so my note changes also, my suicide note is a cowardly gesture I know that fully well, if I have anything to say to anyone I should say it straight to their face, but that is who I am a; wallflower, someone in the background that has a lot to say but decides to remain mute.
Suicide notes have a lot of weight; think about writing one………….but just in your head.