My First Lady

It was one of those hot afternoons, those lazy afternoons that made you wish you were Antarctica; but since I live in 9ja I settled for my Facebook page. Apparently I had a new message.

‘Hi, you remember me?’ it said.

Well I didn’t but was nonetheless excited that it was a female. At some point you just get choked with all that testosterone of boys all over your timeline. ‘No I don’t, why don’t you remind me?”

I accepted her request and somehow accomplished the Olympian task in manhood of getting her phone number. That day I called her for 5minutes. Not because I had credit, Etisalat had a promo going on. She wasn’t a secondary school friend, no just one of those girls who grew up in my area…those girls who you threw stones at when you were 8years old for no real reason. Then one day they packed out of your district and you forgot they existed because you never saw or heard from them again.

I don’t know about you, but holidays are boring in Minna, so Facebook becomes a friend. I rap, so sometimes I put some lyrics as status updates, just to see people’s comments and know I’ve still got game. One day last December, I realized I had spent 21 years in Minna. I put that as a status update and didn’t get any comment. People are just people you know, they just want you to entertain them, but want nothing of your personal baggage. Sometime later I received a notification that she had commented on my status.

“Ha, that would make you the Governor of Niger State oh!”

Laughing, I replied “No problem, as long as you are my first lady.”

And that was how it started. Come on you know what I’m talking about. Some how, I started addressing her as my ‘first lady’ and she liked it. She liked everything about me. Yeah, I have my fans and everything, but it is still nice to just belong to a person and have that person belong to you. This is new to me, I am a reserved person; I don’t know how to be excited at someone’s call or feel that warmth at the sound of her voice, that was probably why I had failed in past relationships. But this girl made me realize with the right person, a man could be anything.

It’s alarming to find I am not bored with her long phone calls about her day. I savor every whimsical detail. You know how girls are. She’s just a girl, but she’s my girl…

One day I answer her call, with the usual rush of emotions. “My first lady…”

“Ya…em…we have been…I don’t….”

At this point, my heart begins a series of not so subtle somersaults. “What’s the matter?”

“Em, when are you going to come and see me?”

Ha…I relax. I am not ready to leave this girl. That I had been terrified at the possibility amuses me. Some hard guy I am…

“Dude…?”

I had it all figured out. My semester exams are in a month’s time and her birthday falls within that period. Minna to Abuja is just 2 hours. I am not usually the big show romantic guy but like I said, with the right girl, a guy can be anything. She’s in for a huge surprise.

“Very soon.” I assure her. “I promise.”



9 thoughts on “My First Lady” by TJ Benson (@jazz)

  1. I should let you have it. And so I will.

    You’re not a beginner, TJ @jazz. At least not to me.

    And that being that, I’d like to point out a few things;

    The fact that you’re not a ‘learner’ far as writing is concerned implies you have some idea what the craft is about.

    Therefore, I do not expect to be reading ‘trial by error’ stories from you anymore.

    Now I ask; WHAT IS THIS?

    You don’t want me to answer that. I sat here and I thought; ‘Finally! A story from TJ I can finally properly read and speak on’. And then you hit me with…THIS?!

    Look at this sentence:

    ” It was one of those hot afternoons, those lazy afternoons that made you wish you were Antarctica; but since I live in 9ja I settled for my facebook. Apparently I had a new message.

    ‘hi, you remember me?’ it said.

    Well I didn’t but was nonetheless excited that it was a female. At some point you just get choked with all that testosterone of boys all over your timeline. ‘No I don’t, why don’t you remind me.” ”

    Now look at this:

    It was one of those hot afternoons, those lazy afternoons that made you wish you were IN Antartica/(or) Antarctic; but since I live in Nigeria I settled for Facebook. Apparently (why is it apparent?) I had a new message.

    ‘Hi, remember me?’ it said.

    Well I didn’t but was nonetheless excited that it was FROM a female. At some point I just get choked with all that testosterone boys constantly leave all over my timeline. ‘No I don’t, why don’t you remind me?”

    See any difference(s)?!

    And it’s not just in that section. The story is littered with ‘it’.

    TJ, don’t waste my time with anything less than your best. You can do better – so much better. What are you aiming for – local champion on Facebook or world renown writer?

    Your choice. And then act accordingly.

    1. Inspiring and encouraging comment from Seun-Ogunkoya. That’s how to point out one’s flaws and give them room to improve without hurting their dignity. We are all learning. Seun, please, I would love you to read and comment on my stories too.

  2. yes boss, doing a friend a favor though.

  3. nice story… but listen to the grand master @seun odukoya, u wl be better fr it

  4. I second @topazo and @seun, @jazz don’t get tired of editing your work. I know editing is boring, but that is the only way to polish your work. Keep writing. You have a good writer’s voice, that made me want to read the whole story, so you definetly engage your readers, that’s really good.

  5. @jazz, it’s a very interesting story that you’ve shared with us, but like they’ve all said, do the needful. I could not get the ‘gist’ in this story and I really would have loved to. Keep writing. You have good story ideas.

  6. I dont know why but i reallylike this story. It is honest, playful, philosophical and still packs a pinch of suspense. Heed the homework but dont throw this baby away. Thumbs up!

  7. Eazy (@amdaboss30)

    Nice story lines, little suspense and don’t forget, you need to work on your tenses …. spot some typos and lest I forget ……. follow oduns advice……. cheers!!

  8. so is there another part because this doesn’t sound like the end

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