There’s Hope

There’s Hope

THERE’S HOPE

 

She looked at him on the bed.

* * * * *

‘Thrown out of the house. Yea, just like that.

Another bottle of beer, please. Thanks.

I know you are a stranger: your bag is more than evidence. Listen still. She gave me just enough transport to go back to the village. To all that poverty, to a hopelessness. C’mon!! Please, waiter, bring another bottle for my friend here.

What? You shake your head. You don’t want a drink? Then, by all means, take some meal or whatever you want, please. There’s little or nothing to life than a celebration of now. Tomorrow is a parcelled box that might turn out a gift or bomb!! Hee hee hee!!

Well, don’t fidget like that. If you would take nothing, at least keep this little gift.

My phone is ringing. Excuse me, please. Oh, it is my sister.

Hello…Yes…You threw me out, why do you want to know?…Well, not as if you care but I am in the Sewuese Bush Bar…Yeah?…But seriously, can I come back and leave tomorrow? You know it’s late… Okay, don’t worry! I wouldn’t come back again or beg you for money!…Hmmm… Bye!

That was her.  Hmm. My friend, I would be fine. I would go home. I only find it sad that I wouldn’t be able to take anything to my fiancée and all those my little cousins. While I was away, they might have been content and kept hoping. You know, the little children used to call me Daddy. Daddy, when you come back, we would get books to write in school. We would get uniform and stop wearing this tear-tear. Hmm… Friend, there is hope. There is hope.

Thanks for listening to me, even silently. Sometimes, we need this. I would go to the village, there might be no farms in a land desecrated by oil spillage or no fish in waters flowing with chemical slime. Still, there is hope and I would cultivate that hope. Indeed, many times, a glorious surplus has germinated from hope’s harvest.

Wipe your eyes friend. They are red. Concern for me? Don’t worry. Don’t worry, I will be fine. Take care. Remember hope! Life’s essence is a continuous reliance on hope. It only ends at the final darkness.

Hey, why do you run so fast…?’

* * * * *

NEWS FLASH: There has been a bomb explosion at the Sewuese Bush market of the Gbatuma Cantonment. So far, casualties stand at three dead and seven injured. The bodies have been deposited at Mfe Hospital with the injured receiving treatment in the same hospital.

 

She shivered!

 

* * * * *

The bodies were charred beyond recognition. She recognised the medallion in what remained of the clenched fist. He had promised to never let it go. He kept his word. An intense feeling of guilt rushed from within streaming slowly out of her eyes. She looked on but saw nothing. She held the charred fingers wondering at the black figure that lay in front of her:

‘If only…’

Someone came and dragged her away. She struggled but after a while allowed herself to be taken away, the medallion in her hands. She thought to herself: So, I forsake him once more, even in death. Why? Why? Why?

 

* * * * *

She wondered who was calling:

Sniff Sniff ‘Yes? … Speaking … What is it?!! … Yes, I am there … You want me to come and take my brother’s dead body? … Hmm? … Yes, I am the woman in the red dress? What?…’

* * * * *

She looked at him on the bed.

She rushed and hugged him. He smarted at the pain of her bear hug. She understood and moved back to look at him. She was too stunned to say a word. He was in obvious pains. She smiled at her younger brother. It didn’t matter that he was a University drop-out any more or that he only wanted to become an artist or was it poet she said. That was something she strongly disagreed with. It didn’t matter that he was badly burned. She had never been happier to see him. Little mattered; her only sibling was alive. That was all that mattered.

‘I gave…the medallion…to…to…shortly before the…take off…and ex…ex…ex…’

‘Don’t worry, don’t talk.’

She walked to the bed and kissed him on the forehead:

‘Rest, brother. There is hope.’

 



20 thoughts on “There’s Hope” by Sueddie Agema (@sueddie)

  1. The begining was chaotic on my senses. But this went quiet well.
    Novel excerpts?
    Well, consider the title. It doesn’t have much punch.

  2. I second kaycee… the title needs kaizen

  3. Sueddie, sueddie, “long time no saw”
    What can I say – hmmm, I think you have something creative here and I kind of get what you were trying to do with the stream of consciousness but it got a bit rowdy. It may just be me but I don’t like to see demarcations in short stories it kind of robs the compactness quality out of it. I believe you can weave the story without it.
    I also think the bomb blast sub-plot felt contrived somewhat.
    Well done.

  4. Sueddie, sueddie, “long time no saw”
    What can I say – hmmm, I think you have something creative here and I kind of get what you were trying to do with the stream of consciousness but it got a bit rowdy. It may just be me but I don’t like to see demarcations in short stories it kind of robs the compactness quality out of it. I believe you can weave the story without it.
    I also think the bomb blast sub-plot felt contrived somewhat.
    Well done.

  5. Hmmm…Nice work Sueddie, this reads like an experimental piece…it needs more work at this stage, but there is beauty and brilliance hidden within. Keep writing bro…

  6. I had to read it twice to understand. Though not so captivating, but it’s not bad. It an experiment afterall, so it could still get better.

  7. Yeey!! Before any one else comments again… Yes it is an experiment!! Strange that everyone seems to have noticed that…Chewing on all the suggestions… It is still in the works…Many thanks…
    @petunia007: of course I have been looking for you too! Hullo!!
    Thanks everyone…many thanks.

  8. Despite the cluttered nature, this does make sense…

  9. Thanks for the vote @sibbylwhyte. Thanks.

  10. I liked this story, @Sueddie. Even though I didn’t know what his quarrel with his sister was, I got that he was drowning his sorrows in a bar. I also liked the twist at the end, and I liked how in the end, you showed the affection that the siblings had for each other that transcended their earlier quarrel.

    Please take 20 points.

  11. Thanks @TolaO… Really glad that you like it. And the points? Hmm, I finally become a recipient of the bounty!! :)
    What do you think of the title? I think it is too bland as @Kaycee and @elovepoetry (thanks for the note) point out…
    @scopeman60: thanks o! @babyada: I was the work, I for vex small… Hee hee hee. Cheers y’all.

  12. If ds is an experiment….then keep working/writing,it has a good storyline.

  13. @obionyinye: would keep that in mind. Thanks…

  14. It’s a nice story of hope and redemption. I also had to read it twice to make complete sense of it. Well done all the same.

  15. I really like the story. Yes, it is untidy but you said it is an experiment. So…

    Nice one man. Nice one.

    We need to talk.

  16. It seems like all as been said..

    But I like still.

  17. Thanks @oluchi007 and @seun: Maybe some day I would give the genesis to this tale… Maybe.
    In all, don’t think much would change when I rework some part…Anything else would be a new tale. I seem to just love this.
    The truth is I tampered with the tale a bit and didn’t let it force its way on me like others are wont to… But well, for once, the
    writer refused to be raped by the flow and stream of consciousness :)
    @Teewah: That’t not true… Stop being like all those Legislators that would only shout: I SECOND! :)
    Thanks for liking… Thanks,

    1. @Sueddie; Haba,I honestly liked it o

  18. Nice, disjointed, felt a little lost at first but very good,keep it up

  19. @teekellz: Well, maybe the disjointed nature is a part of the essence of the sequence. Really, what do you think can be done
    to make the disjointedness coherent in your view. And yes, Thank you, I would keep it – whether up or down :)
    @Teewah: hee hee hee. Noted! At least, I got you to say it without corner-corner!
    I was at the dreamy blog and I was lost… First thing was they told me – are you an adult!
    Choi! Hmm…any small talks…

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