Life sometimes throws a painful reality in our faces and that happens to be the fact that the things we desire most just somehow elude us. It could be that coveted position, that plum job, that business deal or whatever. On a more personal level, it could be the fact that a girl you so much desire happens to be with another man or the other way round. These things hurt real bad but the irony of life is that they just seem destined to always happen even to the very best of us.
I met ST by sheer coincidence during the period I was contemplating leaving BG. It was at a party during the Christmas season of 2005. She was not exceptionally pretty but she had a good height and a nice figure, one that would make any guy look twice, well except the guy was blind or gay. ST was the chic all the guys wanted to groove with on the dance floor and I couldn’t help nodding and smiling to myself as I watched the girl have fun and get a good dose of attention from the guys. Of course there were other girls at the party but somehow she happened to be the type who felt more comfortable with the guys. At a point in the party, she came to sit beside me, panting heavily. I noticed she was quite exhausted.
“You’re really something,” I remarked.
“Yeah, I love dancing” she said. “Besides, I’ve not partied for a good while.”
I simply smiled and took another swig from my beer, wondering if going into much conversation with her would be a good idea. I really did not want to seem to her like all the other guys in the house fighting for her attention.
“Lord, I’m thirsty” she said looking around for any of the waiters.
“I don’t think this would help” I offered, showing her the bottle in my hand in an attempt at humour.
She frowned. “Nah, I don’t drink, especially not Stout”
“I see” I said. “It’s actually medicinal. You should try it sometime.”
Fortunately, she got a pack of juice from a passing waiter and drank a good deal of its content before setting the pack down with a deep sigh. “Now, that’s better.”
We sat in silence for a while, watching the party rock.
“Don’t you dance?” she asked at last.
I had hardly expected such a question. “I do but the dance floor over there looks a little too rough” I explained. “I prefer the smooth stuff.”
“Really? That’s unusual” she remarked.
“Just kidding” I said. “But really, I prefer a less-crowded dance floor”
We spoke for sometime and danced together as well. For the rest of the party, we had a good deal of conversation and to my greatest surprise she ignored every other guy who tried to get her attention. I wondered if I had not attracted unnecessary ‘beef’ from the guys by suddenly taking her away from them. ST did not seem bothered however as she stuck with me. I felt pretty lucky but I did not see the possibility of anything serious happening between us. I never really like girls who were used to so much attention from guys and ST definitely fit that bill.
Over the next few weeks, we began to talk on phone once a while. Our chats were usually interesting and I realized I enjoyed talking to her. We never brought romance into our discussions. In fact, I never bothered to ask her if she was in a relationship and she never bothered to ask me either. I discovered that I felt more comfortable that way even though I also found myself wondering if this girl had a thing for me or was just out to have a good time with a new guy. We never saw each other until about four months later and she actually told me she would love to visit me. At this point, I realized ST was interested in me and I had to admit to myself that I was glad that was the case. On her first visit, I played the perfect host, making her as comfortable as possible. That day, I realized there was a strong chemistry between us but I decided to keep things simple. It was a pretty difficult situation to handle especially considering the fact that she was practically flashing me her ‘green lights’ but I knew I would not want to get serious with her and I thought it best not to take advantage of her.
About a week later, she called me up and said she would love to visit me again. I agreed and this time, I knew it would be hard to resist her. I was right. Despite my efforts to play the perfect host once more, the sexual tension was evident and by the time I held and kissed her, she did not give the slightest resistance. We made love right there and while we lay in bed after the lovemaking, my thoughts went to BG who had told me she was ‘finally ready’ a few days earlier. I had a strong feeling it would be better if I let ST know I was in a serious relationship just so that she could totally push off any ideas of anything serious going on between us. I didn’t mind having flings but I could not be involved in more than one serious relationship at a time, especially considering the fact that I was just twenty.
“ST, I must tell you something” I began.
“What is it?” she said, still lying on my chest.
“I am in a relationship” I said. “I just thought I’d let you know.”
She shot me a furious look and without a word, got up and headed for my bathroom where she locked herself up and had a good cry. I stood at the door all the while, pleading with her. I explained that I had never thought we would go this far and things had happened so fast.
After she left, I wondered if it would have been better to keep quiet and not tell her about my relationship. However, I had decided to be truthful and as it appeared, I had hurt her by being truthful. I had become very fond of ST but I believed I owed it to her to be honest and that was what I had done. My friends hardly helped my dilemma when I related the story to them. They accused me of being foolish and not behaving like the player that I was. At a point, their words began to make sense. Perhaps I should have kept my mouth shut and let nature run its course. Besides, how was I sure ST gave a damn if I was in a relationship or not? I realized I had spoilt everything by opening my mouth and sometimes I still wonder how things would have gone with ST had I kept my mouth shut. As they say, what you don’t know can’t kill you.
SEE YOU IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF THE GEEBEE CHRONICLES.