Troubles of the world

A guest seated on a nest

Two in two allowed a swallow

I beat my chest to test my manhood

I never rested just to become the best

I never relented in my quest

To resist a pest from the west

I went with a pure zeal to seal a zest

I wandered in lands of pleasant wonders

Pondering all boring pains like a bang that pang my sad heart

As I linger with fingers to gingers

While I borrow sorrows when my name should be hallowed



13 thoughts on “Troubles of the world” by Uchechukwu Obiakor (@uchechukwu1)

  1. Interesting poetry. A few mistakes tho.

    ‘a guest sitted on a nest’ should be ‘a guest seated’

    And then…

    ‘pondering all boring pains like a bang that pang my sad heart’

    Care to explain?

    You’ve improved tho. Your work is much neater. Keep it up.

    1. @seun,i meant,enduring all stress and worries.thanks for coming

  2. Good attempt at rhyming.But I find myself asking the question:What is the aim of this piece?

    Well done!!!

    1. thanks@lawal,the aim is to tell the world the troubles that trouble man.once again,thanks

  3. i was impressed with the cordination of the rhymes. nt bad at all but please correct the first line. …

    1. @chetachi,thanks.it will be corrected

  4. I think I get what U tried to do with the ‘sitted’….U r really improving. As for the meaning, it seems to me like U were freestyling….?

  5. The first seven lines or so were good but after that you lost me. I get you were trying to rhyme with nest, but it mostly appeared forced. Like “seal a zest”, what is that?

    Keep writing.

  6. @myne,I never forced the rhyme nest with ….zest.zest means great enjoyment

  7. I didn’t feel the troubles you were trying to tell about.

  8. I guess the poem is about a determined fellow who ended up being dissapointed. I’m an expert though. Nice one but kindly note the errors already pointed out.

  9. bross you are improving. well done. one advice though..try to focus on the message more than the rhymes…as you grow, the rhymes will flow i tell you.

  10. Sometimes its best to steer clear of the rhyme business. I honestly didn’t get the feel of the troubles…it is not a bad piece though. Well done.

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