I miss the Jaja Boys; I mean my former roomies and neighbours on A-Wing of King Jaja Hall, University of Lagos. We had a nice culture that was also in practice at the Mariere extension of the Chemical Engineering boys’ clique. It had to do with exclaiming “Aaaww!” whenever there was a dry joke in the air. It felt sweet and fun to do it to others, but you often don’t want to be the butt of such taunting exercises. People just keep winding you up sometimes, anyways.
Mallam J and I were customers (a la good friends) and he often tormented me with “aaaww-inspiring” lines. To be fair to him and myself, not all jokes or attempts at being funny or witty deserved the “aaaww!”, but many of us just soon became addicted to the stuff. Mallam J intentionally belaboured me with so much of jaw-dropping stuff, especially during his midnight calls. He has a funny way of making/squeezing his face. Doubei ‘Zude, Jyde, Ese, Ufot, Idris (a.k.a Oga Ade), Oloye, Alaka Laurenzo, Majio_UK, MLK are some of the numerous clique members who made life fun in the midst of school pressure. So what’s the point of all this?
Anyways, it was on a Wednesday night, October 20, 2010, around 8:55PM Nigerian time. I was listening to Cool FM 96.9 on my Nokia phone (Nokia for life!!). Then the guys anchoring the show talked about a particular couple. The husband was at the wheels in their car while the wife had sat at the back of the car with their baby. But she had a problem. They had decided to help one of the husband’s colleagues from the office with a ride. The ‘innocent’ lady had taken a place in the front of the car, next to the driver, the husband that is. Paraphrasing the hosts, the wife felt slighted and irritated by the lady’s choice of seat and felt she should have taken a seat next to her and her baby at the back of the car!!!
As usual, many callers called in to voice their opinions. While someone questioned the woman’s *‘para-ing’, another could not just understand why the woman could be so ‘paranoid’. But, who knows the kind of skimpy stuff or cleavage-announcing top the colleague-from-the office’s attire could have been wearing? Someone even said the ‘nagging’ wife needed to take ‘Paracetamol’. Still another guy, albeit mean, said she should take some ‘parrafin (oil)’ to avoid paralysis! One chap even said his own paranalysis of the whole matter was that “some people just like to be paranoid.” On and on they went; both the hosts and the callers. Someone said that her ‘para-ing’ could lead her to paradise too soon! Then, one of the hosts in closing said (paraphrased) that paradventure, she might need the attention of the paramedics!
Aaaww! What an effort at rhymes and rhyming! Right now, I can see Mallam J, Alaka Laurenzo, Jyde, Doubei and MLK reeling on the floor! Aaaww!!!