I was beatified on the same day Sister Irene ‘Nyaatha’ Stefani became ‘Blessed’. While Blessed Irene Stefani began her journey to sainthood, I began mine to slut-hood. The only thing I share with Blessed Irene Stefani is Roman Catholicism and seven-frilled habits. Habits are religious cloths you moron, you can say dresses if you are … Continue reading Blessed Virgin Merry
Allah’s Open Letter to Terrorists Dear Mujahedeen, I have both good and bad news for you. Good news first: your self-proclaimed, self-appointed face of terror, Osama bin Laden, is alive. He was never killed. He is cooling his heels somewhere in the Caribbean with a secret army of American soldiers protecting him and a seraglio … Continue reading Virgins in Short Supply
(My Terrorism Journal) Don’t die a virgin, terrorists are waiting for you in heaven. I am every terrorist’s wet-dream girl. I have big, wide and beautiful/lovely/lustrous eyes, like pearls, just the way the Quran says in Surat Al-Wāqi`ah 56:22 – 23. I am tall, baby-faced (what the Hadith calls eternally young), complexion like that of … Continue reading Don’t Die a Virgin
The ocean swallowed the Bugatti. No, wait a minute. It was not the ocean. It was something else. I heard the screech of rubber on metal as a giant whale swallowed the sports car. The only thought that came to my mind was Jonah’s fish and his adventure in its belly. Celestine had this all … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Russian Submarine
It is every writer’s dream to earn from his writing. Even readers admire Shakespeare’s mastery. Many people today want to be Chimamanda, or NoViolet, or that Kenya’s writer who won the Caine Prize for African Writing in 2003, Yvonne Owuor. Others like me want to be Danielle Steel, or Barbara Bradford, or some other celebrated … Continue reading Getting Paid for Writing
“You try to get away, I will kill you myself. I promise,” Celestine told me. “Like you haven’t tried to kill me in the last twenty-four hours,” I retorted. Celestine ignored me and turned back. “Where are you going?” I asked her, but she was already gone. I could hear her crawling back towards the … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Zero Hour
Boom! Boom! Boom! Gunshots roared as Celestine fired at the guards in quick succession, each a single head shot dropping them like target practice falling plates until it was only one standing, the one who had time to aim his rifle at her. She had caught them off guard. Celestine pointed her gun at the … Continue reading Black Chronicles: The Escape – 2
She is a corundum And a conundrum, Aggressive yet mild in manner This Bubbllinna With face smudged with henna. She ranks as a cabochon Precious gemstone, Cut and polished in language Reads and comments without change; She’s a fan and is fun Her harangues may make you run. She’s a poet and writer … Continue reading Bubbllinna: A Gem on NS
My ears were knelling like death’s gong, and I was almost blinded. I felt hands drag me from where I had fallen. The rest was a dream. In the dream I saw Celestine, the Nikita girl, smiling at me crookedly. I heard the soft swish of electric doors opening and closing. How much time passed, … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Derailed
It started with Tosyn commenting on one of my posts, “Nice one Bruv/Sis. Please keep them coming”. Bubbllinna replied, “Elove is a dude…@tosyn keep off!…hehehe…” Then the Head Wordsmith, Kaycee, asked, “Elove is a dude??? Mtcheeew. All these romantic dudes seff?” I replied without an answer, “Yep??? It happens that ‘we poets’ know paper/pen love, … Continue reading Elove Poetry: A Case of Identity Crisis on NS?
“You can’t make it out of here alive,” the Rubenesque doctor said as I used the key card I had got from the guard to open a door that I presumed would take me to the basement then out of the god-awful place. “You have a family, right?” She said nothing, but I could feel … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Stop Right There
I could feel each and every cubic centimeter of the drugs coursing through my body. I had not been trained on how to fight medical torture and I was almost losing it, but something always told me to hold on. “Where is it, Zohara. You don’t want me to do this. Tell me where it is.” When … Continue reading Black Chronicles: The Escape
Undisclosed Location I woke up to find that I was a spider. Technically I mean. Scores of wires and tubes were attached to my body. They ran to a bank of monitors that I deduced were monitoring my body responses to something being done to me. There was soft music, ballads or blues, playing before … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Interrogation
Even angels fall in love, really— I was afraid and guilty of sin I was corrupting an innocent mind On that very day my heart saw you. On that very day my heart saw you It leapt with divine joy That a soul as gentle as you was created For I was to escape … Continue reading Holy Innocence
Undisclosed location, “There’s so much you need to know,” Ms. Williams said once Celestine closed the door behind her on her way out. “Care for a drink?” I shook my head NO. All the anger that I had bottled up inside me came hurtling back. “Well, at the moment I understand what might be … Continue reading Black Chronicles: Incarcerated