I was sold a lie.
I was told if I wanted to be happy, I must have you.
I was told with you all my fantasies would come to life.
I was told that you would make me a real man (whatever that meant).
So I searched places I thought you could be and found what looked like a glimpse of what you promised.
Yet, I was not satisfied, I had to get more.
I wanted more. No, I needed more.
You were the candy that got sweeter after every lick but you didn’t last long enough.
Was I deceived or was I just didn’t know how to get the best out of you?
I can’t settle for anything less than full satisfaction.
I have sacrificed a lot for you.
I gave up so many relationships just for you.
They say love is blind but my love for you has made me dumb.
I can’t think straight without you.
You had this unbelievable power that no person I know has.
People said you were dangerous for me but I turned deaf ears.
You had shown me realms very few knew of.
I was beyond cloud nine when with you.
I was on top of the world and no one could bring me down.
No matter what I did, you just didn’t last long enough.
So I made my own version of you but it wasn’t enough because I still longed for you.
I could lose it all just for you.
Was I blinded by my expectations of you?
You never for one day gave me a break.
You always kept asking and I gave you.
I kept giving till there was nothing left to give.
I began to take from others to meet your demands.
You had me locked down and I loved it.
Then I woke up and looked at my little boy and looked in the mirror and there was no resemblance.
I didn’t recognize myself.
My little boy looked me in the eye and I could hear his heart-piercing questions.
“Dad, is that you? Is this fatherhood?
Am I really the son of a mighty man like you once said?”
Sadness and anger filled my heart and I made a decision there.
I decided to be the mighty man my boy once loved wholeheartedly.
I am ending this relationship for good.
I know I have said this a thousand times before but today but I will rather die than continue with you.
You are a liar! You are a thief! You are the worst thing to happen to me.
I wish I never met you but I did and now I won’t wallow over that.
You thought this day would never come but here it is. I am leaving you and going to get back all I lost.
I will need help but I am going to get you out of my system and tell the world all about your lies.
The climax of pleasure you promised doesn’t exist.
You are not as beautiful as you claim, you are a Monster!
This is dedicated to all those who have battled with one addiction or the other. Gambling, Porn, Smoking, Drinking, Coke and anything you can’t stop yourself from doing. It’s possible to be free. Don’t believe the lie that it’s your nature. What is seen is temporal. If you need a friend I am here.
Send an email to Mrkoret@hotmail.com Subject Let’s Talk.