I broke my wife’s heart, shattered her trust and I can’t even drum up the energy to beat myself up. I just want to go home, I want her to let me in even though she continues to fight me, and that can’t be good for the baby, I’ll prefer it to this mental torture of imagining what she must be going through.
Glancing back wistfully at my house, I’m ready to get on when I hear her scream…this time, for me. I don’t waste time in running back to the house, I open the door and right there on the floor is my beautiful wife soaked in blood. The baby!
“Jack, our baby. Our baby! Oh this is all your fault.”
She hits me even as I lift her up but it’s weak, I can feel the fear in her voice, I can see it in her eyes. She’s scared.
“I know, baby, I’m sorry.”
I carry her out of the house, put her in the backseat of the car and drive like a mad person to the closest hospital. Throughout the drive she kept saying it was my fault and I agreed with her. It is my fault, if I’d been a little bit more responsible we wouldn’t be heading to the hospital.
We arrive and I quickly carry her in, calling for the nurses to help. Everything after that happened speedily, she was taken to the OR and I was given a form to fill. Sitting there on the chair made me feel like a failure. I’d harmed us, how could she ever forgive me? Cheating was bad, this was worse.
Oh God, please let her be okay, I know I failed please just help me. Help us…help us come out from this.
I waited with no news from anyone about my wife’s condition and it was terrible. The thoughts going through my head were mocking me. I was on my own, I’d done this to us so I deserved to be punished.
I’m not sure how long the doctor had been in there, hours, minutes? But I was glad he eventually came out to speak to me.
“Your wife is highly stressed and it affected her pregnancy. She’ld have miscarried had you not brought her here on time. Mr Charles, your wife needs rest, lots of rest and whatever that can make her happy and relaxed throughout her pregnancy, do it. Or the next time she suffers from this again, she’ll definitely miscarry.” I nod.
“When can I see her?”
“The nurse will let you know. She needs to rest for now.” The doctor replies and I nod again.
The relief I felt knew no bound. My wife and child were safe.
I finally registered that I was alone and was sitting on the floor. I had a fighting chance, I would fight for my wife and kid.
After sometime, a nurse led me to my wife’s room. She was awake and her face was turned to the door but when she saw me she began to shake her head fiercely.
“I want him out of this room! Get out!”
“Madam you need to calm down, you just had surgery. Think about the baby.” The nurse said in a soothing but firm tone.
My wife breathe like she was trying to calm down then she said clearly without raising her voice, “I want him out of this room.”
“If that’s what you want…” The nurse assures her then turn to me.
“Sir, you heard your wife, please leave.”
“But…” I look from the nurse to Sarah who’s now facing the wall.
“Please leave, I’m sorry.” The nurse urged. With defeat written all over my face, I exit the room. I’m so doomed! How will I get her to talk to me?
“Can I check on her later? Maybe she’s still hazy from the drugs.”
I ask the nurse, my eyes pleading with her to understand. The look she gives me tells me she doesn’t know how to tell me off considering the patient’s my wife.
“Maybe later, I’ll let you know.” She finally acquieces, I grab her hand.
“Thank you! Thank you so much.” She looks uncomfortable and I release her.
“Thank you!” I say loudly as she walks away. One more for the road.
Thank you God! My wife and kid are okay, now the plan; How to get my wife to talk to me. God help me on that one. An hour later, I didn’t see the nurse. I put my plan in motion. After seeing that no one was looking in my direction, I stood and went to her door. Still sensing nothing, I open the door quietly and enter, shutting it immediately.
The first thing I did after surveying the room was to thank God that she was asleep. I tiptoed till I reached her bedside and gazed at my sleeping beauty.
“I’m so sorry.” I whisper. One hand supported her head on the pillow, the other lay protectively on her tummy. My angel.
I hear about people cheating on their spouses and I let myself wonder how someone would do that to someone they claimed to love. Why commit to someone if you’re still going to cheat? Now I know differently and while I might not know other people’s reasons for cheating, I know mine can be tagged as a mistake. I never meant to hurt her, it just happened and I regret it a lot but that doesn’t help the fact that my woman’s hurting because of it. I hope she’ll give me a chance.
I take her hand and lace our fingers together, resting it on her tummy. My heart gives a flip when she tightens our fingers and pull closer to me. She might hate me at the moment but her body, her spirit recognises mine and that is all the hope I need.