It was the first thought that came to her as she woke up. He was gone. And soon, this bedroom, the house in whose eastern corner it sat, and the tiny garden outside with its gnarled old red hibiscus and the half-grown mango tree they had planted together, all those would be gone as well. It was the strangest feeling ever. Nithya suddenly jumped up from the bed, behold it was a dream. The dream she had reflected much in the life of her lover, John and she thought it much a bad omen. All her dreams never stop being a reality after a short while, and such made her sweat profusely, even though it was so cold for anyone to be let near a fire, for warmth.
‘Could it be that the movie I watched last night is behind all these’? she was in a dilemma now and knew not what to do next. She rang his mobile phone more than six times but nothing happened. No one picked the call and it seemed heaven had fallen on her. John has never ignored her called for once, no matter the circumstance. Even though inevitable made him not to take the call, his younger brother was always there to let Nithya know that his brother was busy; but nothing like such happened.
She burst out in tears and was almost shouting on top of her voice. It was not long before her mother came in;
‘My daughter, what’s wrong with you’?
She quickly dried her tears and replied; ‘Am okay, mother. There’s nothing wrong with me’
‘Listen to me. Whatever be the case, you must tell me. I am your mother, and if you must hide anything, it shouldn’t be from me. Now, go ahead and tell me the problem’
‘I said am fine’, was Nithya’s reply.
She never wanted to disclose her horrible dream to her mother, neither would she let her know the recent feelings she was having concerning John her lover. Her mother warned her to keep off from young boys until it is time for her to get married. She did not open up to her mother. Because, it was about what her mother hated.
‘It could be that John is dead, or has been kidnapped or…, in fact, I can’t tell’, she kept soliloquizing. The young girl was afraid because all the lost things she saw in her dream made her understand that he was dead or certain persons came to take him away. Those fruits that reflected in her dream were not just mere fruits, but things that are significant to life, gift, humanity and progress. That was the reason she could not bear the dream. Yet, she wouldn’t tell anyone.
She loved John so much that she could not take her meals, but busy thinking about him. She locked herself in her room all day and her mother thought she was out. For the second time, she called him, but would not receive anything positive. All she heard from the mobile feedback was a soft annoying voice of a lady speaking from the customer care saying:
‘The mobile number you dialed is currently not available, please try again later, thank you’.
This voice aroused her the more and she felt as though she would have the lady from the costumer care speak to her facially, so that she would strangle her to death.
The next day, she left her house for John’s without the consent of her mother and never had the intention to return if she did not find him. Her picture while walking to her lover’s house portrayed a lunatic, in that anything happening at the moment seemed to be a movie to her. She asked almost everyone she met about John. The moment she got to his house, it was obvious that the young man equally put his family in a state of fright because his disappearance coincided with her dream.
John had gotten into her mind that she could not bear or resist the little trouble that befell her. She began to lose weight. She never wanted talk to anyone again. She threatened to kill herself; but each moment she tried to do so, someone would come to save her. Her condition became critical that should let her see the doctor, but she refused to do so. Her mother was more than afraid that she would lose her daughter to death. Suddenly, Nithya began to go naught.
The family doctor confirmed that nothing was wrong with her medically, because she responded positively towards every diagnoses made upon her, to figure out whether she was going mad. Her mother, after seeing her with the doctor decided to check her mobile phone. On doing that, she discovered that her daughter had been making out with John, who was probably the cause of everything happening to her daughter. Even though she thought that the young man was responsible, she was not definite, as nothing was purely evidential towards her assumption. It could be that John was her college mate.
The next morning, Nithya woke up and felt better than the previous day. The injection the doctor gave her made her sleep for a while. She barely recalled what happened, as she asked her mother what she was doing in the hospital bed. She slightly forgot that her John was not back from his disappearance.
Towards afternoon, she received a text message asking her if should would prefer apple or mango. It was her mother asking. She quickly recalled how the young mango tree, the hibiscus plant and the rest disappeared. Suddenly she remembered John and began to feel bad again. She tried his mobile number once more, yet nothing happened. She revealed to her mother about her lover and his disappearance. She did this unknowingly. She never wanted to do so, but the emotional feeling she was suffering made her open up. Though she asked for forgiveness from her, which was granted to her. But her mother was heartbroken. She was never aware that her daughter had a boyfriend. She often told her friends how good and different her daughter was, especially from other girls. She was always ready to swear that her daughter had no boyfriend.
Two days later, Nithya had another dream where she saw all those things that were gone returned to her again, but by the time she made her way towards getting those things, she was unable to feel anything. It was as though, her fingers would pass though their inner structure, yet she could not grab them with her hands, neither did she feel the texture of those things. When she woke up, she became more afraid. She concluded this time that those things she was trying to feel was her lover whom her hands could not reach, even though he was close. She made her final say, that he was dead. This was her thought. She began to mourn him.
Nithya began to see strange things, both in dreams and in the physical. Although she hid everything from her parents and never wanted anyone to know about her dreams. She was dying this time. Anyone who saw her would conclude that she would not last the next two days. Because, she automatically changed physically and character-wise. She refused to go to college. Everything about her began to fade away. Her mother tried all she could, but nothing could be done. She had not choice than to feed on regret – she began;
‘So you did this to me, John? I thought we will be together for each other as you promised. But now, you are nowhere to be found. If you had told me you were going to die, I would prepared and died with you. But you ignored me. My mother warned me, but I disobeyed her. I never knew she was doing good to me. I thought she was depriving me the enjoyment of youthful nature. Oh! What have I done to myself? It would have been better if I have never fallen in love the first place, until I get married to my own husband. I thought it wouldn’t be like this. I thought even though he leaves me, I can manage. But all my thoughts are just an irony. Having a lover at a tender age is not really good. Oh God! Please help me’!
Nithya recalled all that her mother had told her concerning how painful it is for a young girl to be in love when it is not time. She thought of committing suicide and nothing else. She was just living like a shadow of death. Because, she was more of a dead person. All hope were lost, she had no strength in her again, she thought of death alone, and what reflected in her mind was a kitchen knife. Suddenly, she was transported in a trance, where something carried her on its palm to the kitchen. Though, she was walking by herself, but could not feel her actions any longer. Getting to the kitchen, the element that transported her there handed a kitchen knife to her. She closed her eyes and saw John walking towards her again. But she couldn’t interpret what she saw, as she had totally lost her mind. The last thing that happened to her was seeing herself cut her throat in the said trance. When she woke from the trance, behold, she was in the spirit world.
After 30 minutes, John came in having a red hibiscus flower in his hand along assorted fruits, of which mango was involved and different garden plants to surprise Nithya, and to show her how much he loved her. Though, his disappearance was to surprise everyone because he won a contract worth five thousand dollars. But getting to the house of his lover, what he saw killed his soul. Nithya was dead. He cried out his heart from his body and walked home hopelessly. John’s life from that day remained a do or die affair.