Their words: I can’t marry a man who earns 200,000 or less.
This is the topic trending hot on social networks all over the web. It has caused a mayhem, which rocks Facebook, Twitter and elsewhere.
I met this one girl and after few flings we settled into the same argument.
***********************************************”Hey Bae!”, I spoke up.
“See, I do not earn 200K a month, though some months I do earn a whole lot more. I do not own that job security that is pension- able”.
She ignored me and paced the room ‘upandan’.
I ignored her fore-closure stance and proceeded.
“I am a hustler, Maria. A damn straight- headed, hopeful hustler”.
“You should’ve told me”, she jumped.
I stood up from the creaking wooden- bed and advanced towards her with a plea shading my eyes.
But you didn’t ask, sweetheart.
My arms were stretched as if to fondle, even as I spoke in a deeper baritone- my idea of ‘romantic’.
“Now that we’ve spoken about, am I still your Dean? Can I still touch your face as I did; I mean, kiss your lips and hold on for an unblinking moment as we did before we had this stupid conversation?”
I was sounding sarcastic but she didn’t look like she noticed it.
“I can’t marry a man that earns 200K or less”, She snapped and shrugged her shoulders as if to avoid my outstretched arm.
“Why? How do you mean, you can’t marry anyone below the 200K-a- month earning margin?”, I asked keeping up with my front.
Her tone was lined with stiff. A seriousness that made it feel like the 200K was a gaiter fastened atop her belly.
You cannot raise a family on just a hundred K?
“I do not even earn up to that. I earn like 40 or 50K. Do you still mind?”. I waited for her to explode.
She slapped my arm away as she angrily spoke. “What don’t you understand about what I said? I can’t marry you.
Her composure was non- flinching.
I understood her message: that though she didn’t mind loosening her belt for a quick penetration, she is thorough when it comes to marriage. Marriage is the problem. The idea of permanence is what scares her. A permanence with little beginnings. She hated that idea of starting little or knowing she’ll start little
“Then we shouldn’t have this conversation, cos you went to bed with me without even asking”, I spoke hurriedly, feigning anger.
She was furious.
“A fling is a fling and marriage is different from that. Don’t you know one has to be objective about these things?” she pursued.
“You are approaching this as if it’s a business”, I intoned hoping to bait her.
“Yea! It is a business,” she answered, falling for it.
“I swept my cell-phones off the lamp-stand and walked back to the bed.
“So, it’s a business now”, I cajoled.
“A lady has to be sure where she is going and what is in it for her”, she answered trying to fine tune the conversation.
What is in it for you!
“What of me? What’s in it for me, Maria?”, I questioned back.
My mind raved. What is in it for both parties? How sure could one be that it’s a good venture to marry someone else?. What is the value of a marriage? Is it in marrying someone who does not see the other apart from his/ her wallet?
I drove the sarcasms home.
While I bring 200K back monthly, how much will you be contributing to the table?”
Her gaze shifted to avoid mine.
What if I loose my job in future? What are the sureties that you’ll stay, being you married me above the 200K mark?”
Her fierce looks were softening out now. The frown on her brows, the twitched lips, they were all loosening out.
She shook her head and I strummed her pains more.
“Yes! Business is business, and since marriage is a business now, let’s discuss it”, I said as I dragged her towards me
“Did Bill Gates and Melinda discuss this?” I queried.
She shook her head.
“Did they sit across the table from each other and sign an MoU on these terms of family financing before their marriage? Was Unoma assured by Godswill Akpabio that ‘I-am-above-the-200K-mark’ before she submitted to him in matrimony? Is that why they are successful?
“Maybe. Dunno”, she mumbled and sighed defeatedly.
Hey! Maria, Calm it down”, I said, still holding her wrist. She struggled a bit more but eventually sat by the foot of the bed.
“Your dad is still married to your mum now; and they both earn less than 200K in pension-able moneys. There’s an only reason why the older generation earned less, trained us all and still stay married while our own generation earns so much, yet fill the court rooms with numerous divorce suits. Have you thought about that?” I questioned proudly seeing that she was catching on my logic.
My arms were stretched over her shoulder and she didn’t shove it down this time. I continued.
“Have you thought of love? What of providence?”
I saw her composure melt and I fired even more.
“Yea! We’ve replaced love with affluence and fads. Money is a criteria for family now. We have so much money- enough to pay the alimony our father’s couldn’t pay”.
She shuffled about on the mattress.
She was subdued and I felt the triumph pumping down my veins as I cuddled her sideways and drove my win home.
“Yet, since you say you can’t marry me, I won’t force it on you. I only wish you were able to see that money cannot buy happiness and that creating that 200K benchmark is a restriction on family resourcefulness”, I said with a mark of finality, stood from the bed and straightened the rumples on my shirts.
“It’s a penny- wise, pound- foolish sentiment, and I’m happy it came out this early. Have a good time”, I said, strode towards the door, opened and fled the room before she could say her apologies.
©Poet Anny-Razon Justin,