Memoirs of A Repentant Slut ~ Episode 19

It’s crazy how you sleep on and wake up to the thoughts of the same person. I felt like picking up my phone to call Jide but I won’t. I know it’s pride but I won’t. I decided to hit the showers, prepare a minor breakfast and get dressed for the hospital but somehow I had a very strong urge to go to the Church. . . Everything is falling apart and prayer seems to be the key.

I scanned through my wardrobe; hit my sweet sixteen legs in a black trouser and a coloured top; slipped my feet in a flat sandal, ate three slice of bread, sipped a little tea, made for the door only to storm into Jide.

I had a mixture of butterflies and goose bumps but it’s definitely that kind of goose bumps you feel when you are caught doing a mischief. I tried to hide my enthusiasm towards Jide. I didn’t know whether to invite him in or be cold towards him.

“Hi.”

“Hello.” He answered.

“Can I come in?

“Sure! Why not.”

“Thanks.”

I walked briskly after Jide. I wasn’t expecting him but my wish definitely had come through. Jide was calm, ever looking handsome and collected. He decided to break the silence this time.

“How have you been?”

“Been good at least.” I replied with mixed feelings.

“I felt we have so much to talk about. I don’t want to use the word you owe me some explanations.”

“I have been hoping we could talk too but I don’t think this is a good time.” I replied him not looking into his eyes.

“Okay. . . I can see you dressed up. What time should we fix?”

“Well right now, I can’t say beause I want to make a stop at the Catholic Church opposite that police station by the school gate and I intend to check on Amaka afterwards.”

“Okay. I’ve been there this morning and she’s a lot better than she was yesterday. The bandage all over her head had been removed.”

“Really? How is she? Like did you get to talk to her?”

“No. She was sleeping when I got there so I didn’t get to speak to her.”

“Okay. Thank God.”

“Can I drop you off?”

“I wouldn’t mind.”

“Nice footwear!”

“Thanks.” I replied full of silent chuckles.
That compliment made it all seem like we might have a chance! *just saying*

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

The drive to the church with Jide was a solemn one. We never said a word to each other until after we arrived the church and he got down to open the door for me. Guess opening the door for a lady isn’t about me alone, guess that’s what he does for every lady he carries or everyone he gave a drive or maybe I was the one who had expected him to just treat me like trash after all, things had gone dead between us.

“Thanks for the ride. I do appreciate.”

“You are welcome.” He said without even taking a single look at me.

It hurts damn much and I also didn’t wait to see him reverse the car not to talk of driving off. I entered briskly into the church and the first thing that caught my eyes was the statue of Jesus at the far side of the altar and the statue of St. Mary at the extreme end of the church but can be seen a little from inside the church. That wasn’t my first time at a Catholic Church ‘cos that was where I grew up church-wise, but it was my first time in this particular church and in the house of God for over 15 years. The church was silent except for a woman who I could see kneeling down in front of the Holy Mary statue praying I guess and lying dejectedly on the ground. She looked familiar from behind but I guess I would have to wait till she’s done to confirm if she really looked familiar.

The weight of the world seemed to be on my shoulders. I broke down in hot tears sitting on the bench in a second row of the church. The tears flowed endlessly and I couldn’t control it. My whole mind radiated sadness and I couldn’t find a drop of happiness. I smelled fear all over me. I was scared of losing everything that seemed to be my source of happiness. . . I had a deep long-thirst for God. I was so mad at God for leaving me all alone those times when I needed Him to show His supremacy and miracles but he never showed up. My heart was broken.
I prayed silently to God to forgive my past and to please, open a clean slate for me. I prayed concerning Amaka too and I never forgot to tell God to make me and Jide work out. He made me feel as if I had a chance at love and everything. I don’t want to lose him, not now, not ever. I stood on my feet to walk to the altar only to discover that the woman whose back view I saw earlier on praying by the St. Mary statue is having a heated-argument with a man who is definitely in his late 50s or early 60s. I couldn’t hide my curiosity anymore as the man was seriously manhandling the woman and she was struggling with him to free herself. She was obviously not as strong as he was.



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