“So, tell me about yourself.”
He gives me this instruction flippantly.
But he doesn’t seek a serious response apparently.
Since we began conversing, I’d identified his real interest;
One that his eyes declared before his lips formed a sentence.
It really wasn’t difficult, he made it plain as day
And although my face kept his attention for a bit,
Clearly my chest held more sway.
The three layers of clothing I’d hoped would be my shield
Had failed at the job that was supposed to be in their field.
Rendering my precautionary steps pointless
Because with minds like his,
Even if I wore a steel armor, I’d still be undressed.
But he asked a question, and I digress.
I wonder what answer would be easiest for him to process…
Shall I tell him the bad, do I exaggerate the good?
Will it matter to him that at the moment my 3 little ones have had no food?
Do I go into details, or would he want plain facts?
I have been diagnosed with diabetes –
How about we talk on that?
I’m working to pay my fees at school,
To my last two exes I was a tool.
My father abandoned us when I was nine.
So yeah, I used to steal at the time.
I’ve had to raise my siblings cus y’know,
Mom’s got drinking problems – and keeps falling for jerks like you.
I struggled with depression in my teens because
It was unlikely that anyone could resist hating all that I was.
My body has always gotten me in trouble.
In fact, my last boss fired me and said I’d do better at a brothel.
I used to smile more when I was little.
I did that for a few more years –
But pretending life is good became too difficult
So I grew content with drowning in my tears.
I have a good voice, but I never sing.
Someone wanted to marry me once,
But my best friend stole the ring.
I’ve got a million questions about life, eternity, and Jesus.
I really love my family and want to know if He would actually save us!
I need a break soon because I can feel myself slipping.
I’d call out for help one more time, but I’ve lost my voice asking.
But then, he doesn’t REALLY want to know this girl.
So I pull up my camisole real high and shrug.
“There’s nothing to tell.”