Its funny how people talk about their love life and I have a whole lot to say but then when it comes to me talking about mine, I just look lost because I really don’t know what to say about it. It doesn’t exist, yea, my love life doesn’t exist. Its not like I don’t have guys asking me out or something, its just me scared of letting the wrong guy in AGAIN. Emphasis on again; I have made mistakes when it comes to guys and I don’t wanna make more mistakes….Overtime, I have created the type of relationship that I want in my head i.e I meet this drop dead handsome young man, who is so loving and caring and then he asks me out; and I’ll say yes and the relationship begins; he would take me out on a real date (I have never been out on a date and I’m 23 *sigh), we’ll have our loveable days and also the days when we get to argue, then finally, he’ll one day get down on his knees and pop the question with a beautiful diamond ring, after which we’ll get married (talking about my dream wedding is another story entirely); but then life is not a bed of roses and we don’t always get what we want, I still think I deserve a chance to fall in love.
The things that I think about tho, the other day I was thinking and I thought what if I never meet anyone that’s gonna make me feel loved, I should probably be a NUN then. Hence my decision to be a nun; I won’t forget the type of prayers my mother started praying immediately I told her about my plans (lool, twasn’t funny); then I sat down again and I started thinking, I wanna be a mum, you know, have my own kids; how exactly am I gonna do that as a nun, so I decided that I’ll probably be a single mother. Hence my decision to be a single mother *arrrrrrrrgggghhhh
I wanna one day meet a guy that’s gonna make me fall in love with him, a guy that’s gonna love me and do everything to make me happy; I wanna have stories to tell when it comes to talking about my love life, there’s just one but, I’M SCARED.