Ebere felt a chill run down her spine as he held her face and pulled her mouth into his. His kiss was hot and desperate as he dug deeper, touring and teasing every corner of her mouth with his tongue. Soon, she could feel the wetness building up gradually between her thighs as her body began to melt against his. She let out a moan as his hands expertly found their way into her blouse and then, undid her bra. But suddenly, just like a flash, the memories that has always haunted her began to blur her senses again; she could no longer feel his touch or his lips against hers- he was now that stranger -and so, she knew has to put a stop to it, before their clothes begin to come off.
“I can’t do this” Ebere jerked off, pulling down her blouse as she stood up from the bed and walked to her dresser. She knew she didn’t have to end it, but she just couldn’t continue.
“What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?” Kenneth, her boyfriend asked dejected once again.
Ebere shook her head as she stared at her reflection in the mirror on the dresser pondering on what was wrong with her.
What was it? Why couldn’t she shake the images away? It’s been over nine years for God’s sake!
“Ebere, I don’t understand. I thought we’ve moved passed this. I thought we are better now and that this was cool” Kenneth lamented.
“I thought so too Ken but I really can’t. Please don’t get me wrong. I do want you, I really do. It’s just that…” Her voice trailed off as she could suddenly see the images again, even as vividly as she could see her face.
“Just that what Ebere?” Ken retorted. “For God’s sake, we’ve been dating for a while now and God knows I’ve been patient trying to understand, but each time I come this close, you push me away” Kenneth nagged. “Do you know how depressing this is?
He stood up and walked towards her. Holding her still to hold her gaze, he looked into her eyes, “I understand that it’s gonna be difficult but trust me, I will never hurt you”. And Ebere swallowed hard. The word ‘trust’ was like a burning coal to her skin; a luxury she could never afford.
“I know that Ken, it’s just that I can’t seem to shake the images out of my head”, Ebere replied biting back the sobs in her throat.
“But Ebi, that was a long time ago. You aren’t the first girl to be raped so I don’t see why you don’t want to grow out of it” Kenneth retorted. “Honestly, I’m tired…How long has it been? …”He paused as he tried to remember. “Three years and you are still keeping me out? All I can say is, it’s not fair. It really isn’t”
Nothing is fair, Ebere wanted to say. Nothing in life ever is and between the both of them, if they were to play the ‘who got the not so fair card’, she would go home the winner because tragedy was all life had dealt her.
It had been nine years ago and Ebere had just returned home from Boarding school to celebrate her parents’ 16th year Anniversary. Her dad who was well-known as one of the most successful businessmen in the country was planning to throw a surprise party for her mum and was kind enough to let her on the secret.
“Don’t you whisper a word to her, you hear me?” her father warned after he had told her the details of the surprise party. She was going to be in charge of the decorations and Ebere had been super excited about it.
“But what if she finds out? You know mum dad, she can always tell when I’m hiding something”, She insisted giggling like a three years old.
“Not this time. Just make sure she doesn’t have a clue, alright?” Dad said and then, placed a kiss on her forehead.
Night came and Ebere couldn’t sleep. She was so excited about the party that she sat up almost all night to make her parents a portrait as her anniversary present. At thirteen, it was all she could afford and she could only hope that they would love it. Few hours into the night, she felt the urgent need to use the bathroom, and disappeared into the one next door. By the time she returned, she came face to face with a stranger….and a gun.
“So you are not going to say anything?” Ken asked jolting her back from memory lane.
“Ehemm Ken, please don’t say that. I’m trying, I really am and maybe I thought I was ready but obviously I am not” Ebere answered quietly, bracing herself for what might become the inevitable-Ken leaving her. Just like the others….
“Alright, no problem…yea, it’s obvious and, you know what else is obvious to me?” He asked moving away from her. “You are definitely not ready for a commitment and I doubt if you’ll ever be”, He answered as he picked up his car keys from her dresser and stormed out of the room.
Ebere stared after him and for a moment, she thought to go after him but decided against it. She turned back to the mirror and stared at her reflection yet again.
“hmm, perhaps you are right Ken” she muttered beneath her breath.
“I don’t think I want that kind of commitment” she continued as a thought crossed her mind and a grin parted her lips. She drew opened the drawer from her dresser and took out a photo. Sticking it on the mirror frame, she stared hard at it….
“…Perhaps, I want something else…” She smiled…….”this”
To be continued….
For the Prologue of this story , kindly click here