I made and ate hot meals.
I had unstained clothing.
I had quiet conversation on the phone.
I slept and ate as i wanted and never worried about
How late i go to bed. I brushed my hair and teeth everyday.
I go out and come in whenever i like.
I had never been puked on, spit on, chewed on or
Pinched by tiny fingers.
I had complete control over my thoughts, my body, my mind.
I slept all night.
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests,
Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up
Late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
I never held a sleeping baby just because i dont want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when i could not stop the hurt.
I never knew something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a mom.
I didnt learn how to change diapers.
I didnt learn how to sing lullaby nor how to rock an infant to sleep
I didnt know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didnt know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didnt know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didnt know that something small could make me feel important.
I had never gotten up every ten minutes, in the middle of the night,
To make sure that all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy,
The love, the heartache, the wonderfulness, or the satisfaction of being a mom.
I didnt know i was capable of feeling so much, before I was a mom.
Meditate on Isaiah 49:15