The best way to kill a lion is to make it feel comfortable and just when it leasts suspects, you strike.
I was doing basically nothing when I heard a knock on my door, just laying on my bed and watching a Morgan Freeman movie. It was monday, a day after my arrival at Yaba-Tech and I had no intention of attending any lecture yet. Although I was a little bit anxious to know how my first lecture would be like, I just felt I ought to give myself a week break before l let school work consume all of my time.
I had just found the perfect spot after lots of tossing and turning all over the bed so standing up to check who was at the door didn’t sound like a good idea but after staying all day in the house all Sunday and no one visiting, I guess curiosity got the best of me as I wondered who the person at the door was.
I reluctantly walked to the door and without asking who it was, I opened the door and without being surprised at the very least, I found Maxwell standing at my door step. Frankly, I was already wondering when he would come over.
“Errr… Hi,” he said, smiling a little too much for the occasion.
“Hello,” I replied. I know Hi is the right response for Hi but having grown up surrounded by Nigerians who regularly replies Hi with Hello, I’ve decided to join them since I can’t obviously beat them.
“Okay… I’m going to go straight to the point.” Maxwell started to say, “I’m really bored right now and in need of some company. Mind if I chill here with you?” He asked, still smiling. His smile was making me feel a bit uncomfortable.
“Sure, no problem,” I replied after thinking about the request quickly and concluding nothing can go wrong. I moved away from the door to let him through and locked the door behind him.
He walked in and went straight to the only painting I had hung on the wall. It was a nature painting of the sun setting above a stream. It wasn’t really a special painting but Maxwell seem to take much interest in it.
“This is beautiful,” he said as he starred intensely at it. I didn’t know what exactly to reply so I just hummed in response and went back to watching my movie.
He starred at the painting a little longer before he turned to speak to me. “You’ve got a really nice place here.”
“Thanks, I replied without looking at him in the face.” He was obviously attracted to me and I was obviously attracted to him too but I had no plans of giving him any signs or making the first move.
“So… What’s up?” He asked as he sat down on the bed beside me. I had a chair but he just had to sit on the bed beside me… Typical.
“I’m fine,” I replied, still not looking at him.
“You know, I can leave if you want me to.” He said with a tone of disappointment.
“And why would you want to do that?” I asked acting like I had no idea what I was doing.
“I came here hoping to chill to you and I’ve been here for over five minutes and you’ve barley said a word. Not to talk about the movie you are watching. Its obvious I’m not welcomed.” He complained.
I finally agreed I had had enough fun. I paused the movie and hibernated the laptop then turned to look at him saying, “so what do you want to do?”
“Well, I have no idea. I was hoping you’ll suggest something.”
I chuckled. “Me? Suggest something? You are the one who is bored. I have no idea too but I’m down for whatever.”
“You know what?” Maxwell asked with a wide grin. He seemed to have found out the perfect solution.
“Put on something. I’m taking you out right now.” He said.
“Out? To where?” I asked, doing a horrible job at hiding my excitement.
“You’ll find out when we get there,” he replied, probably trying to sound mysterious.
“What’s makes you think I want to go anywhere with you right now?” I asked and noticed his grin faded a little so I continued before he could provide a reply, “besides, you need to tell me where you are taking me to so I’ll know exactly what to put on.”
“Just put on something casual.” He said firmly.
I don’t know why I accepted the offer of a stranger to take me out but few minutes later I left my apartment dressed in a black jean and a blue top, I like blue a lot so I have quite a large number of blue tops.
Maxwell took my arm in his and led the way. I had no idea where he was taking me to.
I wasn’t really bored, as a matter of fact I had fuel in the house, tonnes of unfinished movies and video games, tonnes of books to read and an endless list of places I could go to but I decided to go and see my newest neighbour, Funmi.
She had been all that was on my mind since I first met her and I just had to see her, so without really thinking of what I would say to her, I went downstairs to her flat and knocked at the door, it took her a while to open the door and then I found myself telling her how bored I was and how I needed her company. She let me in and my eyes caught the sight of a very beautiful painting.
I once dated a Creative Art and Design student who really took art and design quite serious and I got to love art thanks to her. What struck me the most about the painting on Funmi’s wall was the fact that I saw the signature of my ex on it which meant she was the one who painted it. What was her painting doing on Funmi’s wall? I made a mental note to ask her when next I saw her.
When I snapped back to reality I went to sit down beside her on the bed and tried starting a conversation but her response wasn’t encouraging so I decided to apply reverse psychology and then told her I could go if she wanted, I knew she wouldn’t want me to go but I wanted her to admit it.
The Reverse Psychology thing worked and she stopped watching the movie and gave me her full attention.
“What do you want to do?” She asked me and it was then I realised that I had made a mistake. I should have thought about what I was going to her flat to do before I did. My dumb heart had told me to see her and I had just stupidly done so with no plan.
“Well I have no idea, I was hoping you’ll suggest something.” I said in a low tone.
She didn’t have any suggestions neither and then two wires in my brain touched and a spark followed. I got an idea. A really good idea.
“Put something on, I’m taking you out.” I said and after a little expected reluctance and a few questions she started dressing into something casual.
All girls like a spontaenous guy and I had a spontaenous idea in my mind, what I didn’t know was that staying at home would have been a better idea.
As the bike I boarded to Mary-anne’s house came to a screeching halt at the front of her gate I quickly jumped down and settled the bills.
While I walked to her flat, I had a mental battle trying to deduct what she meant by “I want to see you and we need to talk”.
She may want me to sleep with her again, I had first thought, but I concluded that won’t if at all she offers. The first time was a mistake… A huge mistake. Maxwell and I never really got involved in each other’s relationship not to talk of sleeping with each other’s girlfriends, it just turned out that Mary-anne and I had a little too much to drink.
My mind wandered for a few minutes in search of an explanation but I couldn’t think of any reason why she had called me over I decided to stop disturbing myself and just face whatever came my way.
Just like clockwork, her door swung open just as I got to her door. She didn’t even allow me to knock. I tried to catch a glimpse of her face before walking into her apartment but she seemed to have found something really interesting on the ground as she starred intensely downwards.
She bolted the door as soon as I entered and then started pacing around. I stared at her in silence from the really comfortable couch I sat on. She lived in a self contain apartment with a room mate I barely saw. The room contained a couch, a bed, a Plasma TV set, a home theatre, a shoe rack and a bed-side freezer, how all of that entered the small room was purely some sort of powerful sorcery.
“Are you going to talk to me or pacing around is a better idea?” I finally asked as I got the hint that she wasn’t going to talk anytime soon. She didn’t reply and paced faster.
“Mary! Would you sit your Bottom down?” I instructed with a rather loud tone as I started to get irritated by her steady pacing.
This time she paused for a while then sat at the edge of the bed, the one farthest from me. She kept quiet.
“So what’s up? Why did you call me here?” I asked. She replied me with an unwelcomed silence. “You realise I don’t have all day right?” I continued and once again she kept quiet. It was obvious she was avoiding looking at me. I became rather nervous, “TALK TO ME!” I said very loudly.
It took her a while but she finally turned to look at me in the eyeballs and said, “I haven’t seen my period.”
I paused for a while… No, the whole world paused for a while and then I did what no rational human would do. I stood up and made to leave her house.
I could feel her eyes shooting arrows at me as I worked the bolt on the door and once it was unlocked, I walked out and slammed the door behind me.