The Smart Naughties

The Smart Naughties

“I am going to show you hell in this compound”

“You fool! Idiot, When were you when i spent all my hard earned money to build this house, now here you are telling me how to run the affairs of my own house!”

That’s the landlord shouting ontop of his voice, the meeting was still on but that man does not care on who’s toes he is stepping as long as he makes himself clear to anyone who cares to listen.

We hurriedly went out to get a view of what was happening, our room was in the first upper building and they were having the meeting at the ground floor just in the middle of the compound, everyone was present, you dare not miss his meeting unless you are ready to look for another apartment.

Me and my brother got out of our room, surported our self with the iron bulglary proof that set the margin of the “not well spaced” varandah and we could get the clear view of everything that is happening.

“I am increasing the house rent and there is nothing any of you can do about it, anyone who does not like it that way can pack out!”

“come errm Benji, who this man been they talk to that first time”

My brother asked Benji who was our next door friend or rather partner in crime.

“Guy na your pop-c ooo”

“Our Paale?” me and my brother both spoke at the same time

“yes nah, i been dey here since when the meeting start, i come they wondey if una dey sleep for inside”

“Chai, so this man get mind talk to our paale, Charles wetin we go do na?”

“make we go inside i replied him”

“Errm Benji we dey come oo, just wait here, no go anywhere o”

We both entered inside with the idea of handling that old fool “The Landlord”

Me and my brother are twins, my name is Charles and His is Daniel, not that we are that bad oo, but we deal with people who get in our way, we hate it when our parents get insulted, and this is one of those situation where our bad habits comes in handy and with the help of Benji and Paul we form the undisputed Champions that rule the streets of “Ilukwe”.

The plan has been maped out and the actors written down, we came out again and met Benji still sitting and watching.

“Hey Benji, its show time oo, you dey in?”

“Oga Danito! You self know say i dey loyal” – Its not that we do anything special for Benji but he enjoys playing the bad guy and Paul just want to belong but he is kinda scared sometimes, but this time, he was not at home.

“Good, now here is the plan……”

****

I went down to the meeting place to meet my dad, i think am the one that is loved by dad, he hardly say no to my request.

“Am hungry o Daddy”

“Is there no food in the house?”

“There is but i want something else”

“then what is that?” – My daddy asked without getting an answer from me, was i even hungry?.

I stood up from near my dad in playfull manner and went near the landlord, my dad tried to signal me not to go, but i turned deaf ears, just on getting close to the landlord i faked a fall and luckily for me i got what i wanted, His Car keys.

“Oh Gosh, Who is this dirty kid, who owns this idiot?, Does he want to stain me? Do you and your parents know how much i bought this clothes?”

I stood up and ran outside with the trophy i just got, after 5minits my brother and Benji joined me outside and they smuggled a galon and fuel pipe with them, we went straight to the landlords car, opened his fuel cap and sucked out almost all the fuel in his car and then filled it with sand.

Now plan 1 and 2 has worked out, remaining Plan 3. “How are we going to return The Car Keys?” that man will curse us with all he has got left in him.

I used water to wet a piece of cloth and then went to the meeting place and tried to clean the landlord’s Shoe. And with style i droped the key on the floor just below his right leg.

“Get the hell out of here, i use costly polish to clean my shoe not water and rag! You goat!”

My dad was not happy, but he better not talk but he knows his children are upto something and he was kinda pleased and he watched and smiled.

With all our plans all carried out, we went upstairs and used the fuel to start the generating set, slot in a music and danced, just like thieves who has succesfully carried out an operation.

****

Do i still need to say what happened next?…

The ever proud, puffing, classy landlord went home with public transport.

Well, thats just one of our succesfull operation as kids then, we were just 14years as at the time we carried out this particular act, now when i think of them, i don’t even know how i feel, sumtimes happy, sometimes sad but most of all, me and my twin were just great.



4 thoughts on “The Smart Naughties” by Wise_Mezie (@Chimezie)

  1. So you did that, naughty you.
    My lil brother once pissed in a bottle and squashed orange on it and gave our gateman to drink, the alaroro took a gulp and beat hell out of him.
    Nice, childhood memories are priceless.
    Your I’s were of lower case, take note, they should be capital.

    1. Thanks dear…Lol thats one of my bad habits o..thanks for reading

  2. Naughty-by-nature. hahahahaha! childhood memories….. when you’d buy some candies and chewing-gum several times from mama at the shop with the same money, don’t ask me how we did it way-back.

  3. @Shovey Lol…abi nah..u try

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