” How dare they sing those christmas carols of celebration. ”
With the memories of Bisi strongly in my heart, i was so empty. i block out all sight and sounds of christmas. with a cold and heavy heart i chose to alter the calender and omit december. How dare there be festive season! how dare they sing those silly santa songs! ” santa is dead.” and there is no ” Christ ” in christmas to celebrate.
3 years ago on a christmas eve, so many miles away from home. my Bisi was taken away, suddenly and tragically. It was a year filled with total confusion, frustration, shock and emptiness. A year flooded with a million tears. Christmas………NO WAY!
The one who showed me the true meaning of life. She gave me so much courage and joy. Her love blossemed and strengthened my faith. Her warmth could ligth a thousand candles. Her trust and compassion for others was great. All she ever wanted was a simple life.
My heart cries out. Why do the good ones always go! Will i ever be able to say to God ” she’s yours now, i’m letting go ” Each day breaks as i awake, reality fills my mind. It grips my heart like a tightening knot. I can’t get away, it’s like being caugth.
For the first time in 5 years. A warm and fuzzy glow wrapped it arms around me, and i shed tears of joy for the memories that i tried so hard to forget. A christmas tree was quickly purchased, and placed on a corner table. As i shape the tattered branches, i remember the angels for whom the tree was given. I Felt my heart in hamony as i whisper ” merry christmsas, Angels.”