‘I’m into you’ the chorus of Jennifer Lopez’s song played in the background of the Mexican soap I was watching. And then thoughts of you flooded my mind again. I could not put myself together to get over it. I know you knew how much of you I wanted. My thirst for you kept burning insatiably. It was mutual. I saw it in your eyes. I heard it in your voice. When you smiled, it was as if my name had been pasted to your lips. I will see you in a week’s time you said, after the apocalypse. You said you needed time to think it over. I conceded to you. Was I left a choice? Seeing you in seven days again, oh no! That only paralleled to been on a life support. No thanks to our nation’s epileptic power. I was not sure of what to expect.
The thought of seven days was like forever. There were times I had and lost faith. There were other times I cried and laughed too. Hoping fate would work in my favour. Patiently I waited for the heavy ticking arms of the seconds to crawl by slowly. I still remember the way you eased my fears, it made me feel like been in heaven. I might not find enough words to express myself. Possibly it is because of the overwhelming surge of emotions. I had gone back to the first night I saw you, I have tried hard to see you again and again via my concave lenses. Been sure of how I felt then was so uncertain, I did not even know what I wanted yet. I still remember you been so nice with your words, and generous with your smiles.
Standing in the way of the law because of you came to be naturally. I could not afford to just fold my arms and watch another fine young man thrown to jail again like that for a bail-able offence. Your infectious personality rubbed off on everybody at the pre-jury. Remember the panel was cancelled, and you said your heartfelt gratitude, smartly pushing a note scrambled on a yellow paper in my hands. It read: ‘dinner please?’ I looked back at you and smiled. You winked and said tomorrow by 7pm at the Le Meridian Hotel. Briskly you walked past me. Your celerity had poise unlike your hand writing. Besides, the beat your spoor made with the wooden floor would make a number one dance track any day.
Your broad shoulders were evenly squared in an irreplaceable way. Majestically you stepped out of the lobby into your car without a second backward glance and by 7pm the next day, your three quick-knocks caressed the door to my apartment at the 1004 unit flats. Was there a need to peep through the pigeon-hole? Maybe to be doubly-sure or perhaps, I had to, just out of sheer curiosity. And there you were with your gold-rimmed spectacles, your lips, full and pouted. Your hair, well brushed, not a strand out of place. I could smell your fragrance from my view point. Quickly I unlatched the bolt, and you stepped in, absorbing the moment. Wow! What a cozy apartment you have here, you said as you slid of your leather slippers, allowing your well pedicure feet to have a first-hand feel of the rug. ‘It is so soft.’ Thank you I said, my eyes glued to you.
You were dashingly irresistible. You bent over and placed a soft delicate kiss to my cheeks. ‘Hello Ms. Salvador’ you smiled. ‘How do you do tonight?’ The inflection in your voice had my ears tingling. ‘How do you do too, Mr. Ibrahim?’ I smiled back, closing the chasm. You sprang to work taking charge of our discussion. It came to you naturally, albeit your suaveness. Quietly you held my arm, and led me to the mouth of the lift into the night.
We meandered through the streets of Victoria Island till we got to the gate over-looking the fountain at the Le Meridian in your sleek Toyota Avalon. I still remember the dinner was fun. You made fun of everything. From the wine-glasses they served us with, to the cutleries and even the mannerism of the waiters. And when your friend-the waiter you later tipped on our way out, whose wine glass slipped off the tray in his hands, said he was sorry, you laughed as the content poured on your black denim freely. It was jokes and jokes all the way and I laughed myself to stupor. I must confess that was one of the best nights of my life. A little at a time you came. Dropping a part of you in me till the day you became whole in me.
Though not having the appanage of been asked-out like others, never for one day was any of your actions made me question why. Ours was different. Our love clouded the sun by day and burnt the moon off at night. For each step we took, we were careful and watchful. We waited till we were more than friends before we made love the first time. The thought of it alone, keeps me warm anytime I ruminate on it now. Sola what was it like to have a matured woman you had to teach sex in bed? What was it like to deal with the gnawing naivety? Yet you never complained, instead you applauded me all the way.
You asked me what I wanted, love I replied. ‘Sola what would you trade in return?’ I asked firmly with an even voice. You said music. I don’t sing I said smiling, but you would not listen to any of that. What you told me was my love to you was music playing. I laughed and you watched me till I cried. My love was complex I knew. Complicated, yet that was my best you had. Slowly, you started pushing to know who I was behind the facade. This is all of me I would reply and you would smile. ‘Sanmi I want to know all about the daddy’s little girl before she became a woman, I have come to know now’.
I would smile and wave it aside. Although my dad is late now, his memory would forever remain fresh to me. Then my countenance would go frigid out of the blue. I would suddenly go numb. Subsequently my mind would go blank, because that was what was best for me. But your intrusiveness would not allow me a breath. You kept pushing through my shield till my walls came crashing down. And there you were in my eyes, asking me questions I had never been courageous enough, ever to reply you or anyone else. It sucked. I was the butt. I had always enjoyed been on the fence or in-charge, but I must commend your subtlety. You watched me break in and out of silent sobs as the tears rolled down my eyes with blandness.
You had me in that corner a million and one men had so longed for. Your voyage into me was diplomatic. Believe you me. I did not see you coming. That was so calculative and you read me so easily, my naivety screaming, pleading for cover. Yet in all your wisdom, you had settled for the other-wanting, waiting to hear it all from the horse’s mouth.