ONE SCHOOL DAY: Featuring Her Royal Kinkiness…

I’m wincing as I pull my comb through my thick mass of dark kinky hair. It’s a very African hair that has not yet been subjected to the chemical touch of the Americans; so while my mates are all sporting silky, smooth, straight hair, I’m like a living relic from the past to remind them that once upon a time, African hair was kinky.

I will be late for school again. My hair is only half way combed and even that took about twenty minutes. It’s ten minutes to nine and there is no way my hair is going to be ready in five minutes so that I can get to school by nine for my Law of Contract lecture. Maybe ready for to scare a small child, or ready for the barber to cut, or ready to make me cry, but definitely not ready for me to take to school.

My friend is leaving me to school today. She’s already prepared and really, I would not feel good about making her late to school again. I’ve already done that one too many times. My Indomie is still on my table, uneaten. That’s going to take me about fifteen minutes to finish. Where do I get 15 free minutes from?

Ouch! I think I’ve just pulled some strands of my hair from my scalp. This is bad. I wish I didn’t have kinky, untamed hair like this. It’s during times like this that I wish I was on a low cut hair. And it’s during times like this that I tell myself and anyone that’s willing to listen that I would cut my hair soon…

Hmmm….the hair’s gradually getting untangled. Now, I just have to take it easy and comb carefully and thoroughly to bring out the kinks and knots. Thank God it’s finally looking ready.

What’s the time now? What?! It’s already twenty minutes past nine. My phone is beeping. I have a message from my friend. Mr. Ochems is in class. So I am late again. The lecturer is already teaching and I have an assignment to submit. I don’t feel like going to school anymore. My Indomie is really tantalising. If I eat it, I’ll get to school something around ten o’clock. If I don’t I’ll get hungry in class and I’ll start having stomach aches again. And I dread stomach ache. Oh, what’s a girl to do? I’ll just take one forkful of Indomie. Mmm…I’ll take one more. Just one more. Oh, why does food taste so good when one’s in a hurry?

I really have to leave now. I’ve covered the indomie and if it’s still edible when I get back then I’ll eat it but if not, poor indomie, I’ll have to throw it away.

I hope my afro hairstyle looks good. Bye…I have a class to catch. I hope there’s a bus waiting outside…



35 thoughts on “ONE SCHOOL DAY: Featuring Her Royal Kinkiness…” by queennobo (@queennobo)

  1. A page from a diary? Oh well. Kinky hair can be a real pain in the neck. And if U happen to have one that is stubborn like mine, even if the chemical has been layered on one too many times, it still remains frustratingly kinky….

    1. @sibbylwhyte, just one of the joys of ladyhood…

  2. hahaha. I like this, so girl-y and cute a write. you must be a pristine dame, with kinky hair and outmoded taste. Isn’t it a surprise that you are beautiful? So Africans can retain natural grace and still sparkle? Nice, @queennobo

    1. @fervency, outmoded? Let’s just say I’m a retro girl most of the time…
      Thank you for your many compliments…

  3. Excellent piece. I love everything about it.
    My little school mistress insists thou so let me see how well @queennobo handles a query
    1. Was the hair combed dry or wet? Wet African hair is more manageable. .:)
    2. Have you ever considered a low cut or dreadlocks? After about twenty years of contemplating on this matter I am almost convinced God never intended any of the pain our scalps go through
    3. Why not pack your indomie?
    Fabulous piece and a priviledged glimpse into the life of the queen of Enestera’s chicklit!

    1. @sunshine, who is the little school mistress that wants to know? Her Royal Kinkiness seeks to know…

  4. Oh! So dis is d story abt dat hair episode u mentnd. Lovely narratn! I’l say no more. ;)

  5. Am sure your afro-style looks good. U could try using texturizers to make it more manageable sha.

    Good write-up, tho I think it needs a little polishing here and there. For example, ‘Maybe ready for to scare a small child’ would look better as ‘Maybe ready for scaring a small child’.

    Good job.

    1. @shadiat, thank you for your tips, both for my writing and my hair…

  6. This is good. If this is a page from a diary, then you might to publish it someday, just like Adeniran did with her novel; ‘Imagine This’. Have you read the book?

    1. @strongslef, no, I haven’t read it. Though I think I would love to. I like books written in diary format.
      As for publishing my diary, well….

    2. @strongself, no, I haven’t read it. Though I think I would love to. I like books written in diary format.
      As for publishing my diary, well….

    1. @ostar, I’m glad you do!

  7. Ehm… I’ll just refer my sis to this. Her hair looks too unoriginal- as if I even know what I’m talking about…

    Nice. Your work still needs some improvement though.

  8. @francis…when you say her hair looks unoriginal…do you mean it is kinky like mine?
    As for improvements on my writing, you’re welcome to point them out anytime…
    Thank you!

  9. Lovely piece, short and straight to the point

  10. You write well.
    I don’t like the story.

    1. Well, real life experiences aren’t always exciting to everybody…

  11. why this reminds me of Erykah Badu, I have no idea, sorry Im with @kaycee on this one, nice writer, not too clear writing. @queennobo Im going to try and read something you wrote elsewhere…

    1. She also keeps a big Afro, doesn’t she? You don’t have to apologize for being with Kaycee…Other works I have here might interest you more….

  12. This is good. It kind of reads like an episode out of a series? Wld try to look around for more of your works.

    Well done!!!

    1. Episode out of series? Well, that series is my life, @easylife2. Do look around and when you see more of my works, do not hesitate to give your honest assessment. Thanks…

  13. does this continue or ends here?

    No doubt it is an excerpt from a diary.
    nice telling,

    1. Thanks @afronuts….I don’t have plans of continuing it as a series..though if any thing worth telling comes up, I won’t hesitate to continue….

  14. Seriously, you should have called help.

    Nice writing.

    1. **…called for help**

      1. @layrite, I wish you’d have been there to help me…

  15. Hehehe…woman wahala don come again O. Seriously, I wonder how women cope in life with all these many obstacles they have to contend with. I have kinky hair too and even when its low, combing it can be a real problem; sometimes bringing me to tears. Then imagine the predicament of a lady with such hair, a long one at that. Oyinbo know wetin dem do jare for make relaxer.

    Anyways, now to some critique:

    As @shadiat has pointed out, you made a mistake in
    “Maybe ready for to scare a small child…”

    “Ouch! I think I’ve just pulled some strands of my hair from my scalp.” I think you didn’t need to repeat the MY before hair in ‘my hair’ because naturally, it’s only your hair that is rooted to your scalp. So this would have sufficed:

    “Ouch! I think I’ve just pulled some strands of hair from my scalp.”

    “It’s during times like this that I wish I was on a low cut hair.” This isn’t eloquent writing here. First, it’s better to use during with a particular activity, and not time in general. Yes, it’s used often in spoken speech but I doubt it is a correct usage. Secondly, and more importantly, ‘…I was on a low cut hair.”, is really the culprit here. There are syntax confusions in that line. Why not:

    “It’s at times as this, I wish I wore a low-cut.”

    “It’s at such times as this, I wish my hair was cut low.”

    “And it’s during times like this that I tell myself and anyone that’s willing to listen that I would cut my hair soon…”. Same issue here

    Since you were using the brand name Indomie as a replacement for noodles, all use of the word Indomie in the story ought to be capitalized.

    Well done Queennobo. Keep improving your art. There is no end to learning.

    1. @chemokopi, first off, let me say you’d make quite an excellent editor. I looked at those lines before publishing and though I felt there was something wrong about them, I couldn’t for the life of me figure it out…
      Thanks for all your corrections, though the one about the Indomie is probably a mistake because the word always starts with a capital ‘I’ throughout the post.

  16. lol…dis resembles wad i go thru most mornings..almst xactly alike. I hate d hair part of my mornings.
    Well done@ queennobo

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