We never cease to ponder
Why they pile and plunder
Still they smile and wander
Free like birds we wonder
Promises lasting forever
Actions we see like never
Their words entice like butter
Yet they oppress like thunder
No! We just can’t sit and watch
Evil permeate our blood so hot
For soon the poison would sink too deep
Then like robots we sleep and slip
Down the drains so dark and slippery
Crammed with evils thick and slimy
Where reasons fade fast in prisons
Built with greed from seasons to seasons
No! We must fight! Declare a war!
Let them hear from far and near
No more shall we just sit and rest
While they plan to steal the rest
Awake to the battle
Aye make them startle
Resist every evil
Bind up every devil
Arise to fight, come with arms
Come, though not with metal arms
Join us link our arms in arms
So we form resistant frames
Fight the evils and live for good
Thus our strength remains by God
Kill the thoughts to tow their line
Watch and guard thy pure true vine
Arise warriors, heed the war cry!
The battle we know is bitter to fight
Yet victory like wine is sweet to share
Bravo! Bravo! Come one come all!
Oya na!…It would be fascinating to see the result of a war such as this…
Nice one…the rhymes are off in some lines sha…But Well done still….$ß.
@sibbylwhyte we can’t know the result, till we fight the war, but it’s promising one you can bet.
…about the rhyming, I agree, sometimes it’s just difficult for rushing thoughts to flow rhythmically.
I guess poetry is not only about rhyming words, but also meaningful thoughts, I think. I appreciate your stopping by bubllinna, I really do. Thanks ma’am
If my comment made it seem like your rhyming scheme detracted from the piece…then it’s wrong..
I’ve always believed that poetry should flow and not just have rhymes that are forced…So yours in my opinion is a good work… It passes the message across to us, nicely..
I read you loud and clear @sibbylwhyte, roger that. Thanks again…
Your Excellency, this is par excellence!
I’m impressed with the tone and structure of this piece. Its a delightful call to ‘arms’
The message is clear, succinct and it reads with fluidly.
My favourite stanza is this:
“Promises lasting forever
Actions we see like never
Their words entice like butter
Yet they oppress like thunder”
Your rhyming is excellent, but some words I think could be better phased, eg…
Crammed with evil thick and slimy
Built with greed from season to season
Join us link our arm in arms
Fight the evil and live for good or Fight this evil and live for good
Oh thanks for the compliment and I hear the complement
“No! We just can’t sit and watch
Evil permeate our blood so witch
No more shall we just sit and rest
While they plan to steal the nest
Arise warriors, heed the war cry!
The battle we know is bitter to ply
Yet victory like wine is sweet to share
come then with arms not arms to dare
Bravo! Bravo! Come one come all!”
Just attempting suggestion; let this art stew and flow.
Must not rhyme when it doesn’t. Notch up man, you will
hatch great!
Thanks…
I’ve always been one for rhymes and a bit of rhythm. I loved the flow Your Excellency. Smoothly written
Thanks @moskeda…
Beautifully written … Hail..!
I appreciate that @josephoguche. I hail pass…
Nice, Nice, Nice….
thanks, thanks, thanks… lol
Long thing, hehehe. 9ja…
Nice lines.
Much thanks @Raymond, but where e long reach.
Lovely rhymes.
Go fight. I will sit here and write your story.
hahaha @Kaycee
I’m sure you remember the poem:
…the valiant ones never taste death but once…
but I trust if you write it, then our story would be masterly translated, eliciting every support possible…
Thanks for the compliment.
Nice one as always.
Hmm, thanks @Seun-Odukoya, thanks…
Nice one…flows well
Thanks @onyinye
Nice one Your @excellency, really nice…
Thanks Sire…