May 272012
Please, join spread the news.
My lines may be so few,
but, many will go anytime due.
Think about the cue;
Brothers,sisters,mothers,fathers in a crew.
And many more friends we never knew,
In a lake that swallows more than a few,
As they miss Heavens dew.
This message to your ears is never new.
T o live in Christ-you’re a creature new.
thank you for this, for reminding all of us. The message can never grow old. God bless your heart for being a witness for Christ
Must u necessary maintain ur rhyming scheme…?
Ur poem is an offshot.keep writin and u ll imprvove.u can write a blank verse and dont necessary hav to rhyme.
Best of luck!
The rhymes, I think are nice but in a bid to inculcate them your poem nearly got non-poetic.
Your punctuation (commas especially), are too much for a poem as they prevent the required flow.
This almost reads like a message on a gospel pamphlet- which isn’t bad- however, if it’s to be a poem, do work on it.
You have a lovely message here. Well done @tuee
Thanks for the message. But some of the rhymes seem forced.
Keep writing
Only the message was good.
Your delivery…
Message was good. Delivery wasn’t too good but twas engaging. I would really enjoy to see you improvd. Gracias.
This reads like a nursery rhyme. I’m sure you remember the jack-and-jill thing-y. No poem, just rhyme.
Amen…