In a void
Alone, silence
Unaware, unthinking
Unseeing, unknown.
Probably dying.
Then your blood came streaming in
Through my tiny self, giving it life
Yes you gave your blood
And life came
Fetal indeed
But I’m alive.
Confused, unseeing.
Then I heard
“Thud, thud, thud”
The sound that could mean a million things now
Only meant one thing then
It meant
“You are alive, ‘Oma mi’, stay alive
If you can hear this,
Then I’m here with you.
So stay alive”,
Your heartbeat kept me telling me.
Thud when you are awake
Thud when you are sleep.
Until the moon came and went
And came again and went again.
Your heartbeat kept telling me,
“I am here Oma mi, stay alive”.
So I stayed alive to the songs of your heart
Mostly I slept, still in the dark
But no longer afraid
Though alone
Yet never alone
Because one day, one sweet sweet day
I heard it.
The song, beautiful
The words, clear
Though understanding eludes my unformed mind
But the voice was “magic”.
And small, curled up even,
I smiled, in my dark little
Warm and loving cocoon.
I found smile while in you.
I listened for your voice everyday
As it tells me things that…
That …probably made you sound stupid to the
World beyond mine.
I listened for your voice day and night
And I knew that,
Even when you sleep,
you talked to me.
Now I could hear
Your heartbeats
Your voice
And my little “blood warm” cocoon
became a fetal heaven.
But I have never felt
Until you touched me
The gentlest of touches
The sweetest of caresses
And my feeble limbs sprang
To life.
Because now I know that it was
Possible to reach
To touch
So God help me, I wanted to touch my heaven
My life, my music.
I wanted to touch “YOU”
but when my feeble limbs excerts themselves
Trying to feel you and my fetal touches
Became unrelenting kicks,
Something divine came through the
Layers of warm coverings that separates us
And calmed me.
Cos’ you touched me and
I touched you back,
You felt my touches and laughed with joy
The sweetest rings of heavenly bells
So I found peace and calmness
In the sound of your laughter.
Happy to be alive
And simply living for
The sound
And the touch of you.
Then sometime
Too soon
Forces greater than me came pulling
And pushing
Threatening to wrench me from my heaven
What disaster is this?
To loose this divine habitation?
I’ll fight it all
With every drop of the blood
You have generously bestowed in me
Am I to loose this life?
Never to hear the music of your heart?
The magic of your voice?
The loving caresses of your touch?
And the calmness I’ve found in your sweet laughter?
I will fight this.
But the forces won’t let up
Determined, it seemed
To eject me from the heaven you have given me.
This can’t be real.
The rhythm of your heart goes faster
So I could not dance.
I heard pain and agony
In your magical voice.
Your sweet laughter ceased altogether.
And the touches I felt
Were those of strangers.
So I wondered
Is my MOTHER in danger?
Has a legion invaded our utopian territory?
If so
Then I must come at once
For where is life if you
Are not there
Where will I find music of the heart
And magic of the voice and the peace of sweet laughter and
The assurance of a loving touch?
So sailing on the current
Of your warm blood
I came
Charging with a war cry to
Defend and if necessary
to rescue my heaven, you – AGNES.
Oh but that scent
Jasmine would die of jealousy
And all other sweet smelling
Floral will remain green for
Ever, never blooming out of jealousy
For the scent of you.
For a sec, I caught a glimpse of
Your face though my
Eyes were weak, yet I knew
You when I saw you
Cos’ in my sleep while curled
Up in you, I’ve put a face to the voice
That puts me at ease and that face has this smile
So in one swift moment
That I came charging from my heaven into
This strange world to rescue my AGNES,
I was assaulted by the sweetest scent,
The scent of you
Beheld by the loveliest eyes and smile
Your face, your eyes, your smile
The sweat on your brow mingled with
The tears in your eyes
Both Dropped, suspended
In light
For an instant catching the brightness …
Yes it’s no longer dark.
Wrapped in your loving arms
Hearing the prayers of your lips
Those heavenly Words that I lived with everyday
While in you,
Then I knew I was home
With you, AGNES.

For: Agnes Adekunle Ogungbamila
(10 years since you left us, Agnes, but we can’t love you less, even if we tried).

13 thoughts on “Agnes” by ilerioluwa (@ilerioluwa)

  1. Ow! Words my bro…
    May she continue to rest….

    1. amen. thanks a lot

  2. May she continue to rest in Peace…

  3. She rests in peace and lives in those who knew…..

    The connection between mother and child is a labyrinth, a systematic order of nature.

    I feel honored to read this, thanks for sharing.

  4. This is as beautiful as it gets…every true mother will feel honoured by this nicely written ode to motherhood and the bond of mother and fetal child.


  5. Oh oh oh…. May God continue to rest her soul.

  6. Calling her AGNES was kinda too straight and somehow made it loose it deepness. What if you’d call her praise names or language name. Or better still ‘mum’ ‘sweet mother’ ‘ada’ etc. Just to make the impact more imprinted.
    Gracias. I felt it.

  7. God bless all the good mothers, present and past.
    A wonder piece of ode.
    Well done.

  8. what a nice piece you got here – you pieces like this should help us appreciate people and love and cherish them as well which is the essence of God in us well done. its not easy to write poems.

  9. I felt this all through… good job.

  10. wow! that piece remains me of my mother.

  11. its mostly about our mothers who paid a great price for our future well done again

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