The Mystique

The Mystique

She was here.

Right here,I say.

like weeds on my barn

scattered over my orchard.

Her voice I hear,

weaved around my head-

like yam leaves in my farm.

Her smile, Yes!

that strikes like yellow thunder

still leaves me shivering.

I had to bury it quickly

that she was really here.

But her eyes still stares-glaring

from the depth of the earth crust.

In my match box, her blood

speaks of her being here.

The mystique of another life…



10 thoughts on “The Mystique” by tuee (@tuee)

  1. Serial killer? Or is ‘she’ something more absurd or just symbolic. Enjoyed reading it. Loved the powerful use of simple words to convey deep meanings. Kinda have an interpretation, not sure if it’ll be what you have in mind when you wrote this. Very good poem.

  2. really deep. not sure what the writer is talking about though cause there’s so much symbolism.can he (or she) explain to us? I’m really curious

  3. *winks* I really like this powerfully mysterious poem. Though I wish I could decode who or what “she” symbolizes. Very fitting title indeed. And it makes good use of vivid imagery too. However, I suggest you replace that word “thunder” with “lightning” because of your use of “strikes” and “yellow.” Nonetheless, well done! http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/koboko

  4. Mr. Fairclough,I find this interesting but deep as stated.

  5. I’m not sure i get this? Somebody help me out . . .

    1. Hm, Lade. Your love for the dark and confused in creative writing still couldn’t let you decipher this, hm? That’s, em, quite odd.

      Well, from what I could decipher from this short poem, the poet is talking about either a woman from his past whom he had wanted to forget through the ‘burial’ of her memory (whom he had probably killed) or a dead woman of whom he had seen her ghost and which is a very unpleasant sight indeed. I was encouraged by this description: “like weeds on my barn/scattered over my orchard.”; “like yam leaves in my farm.”; “from the depth of the earth crust.” This is purely a surrealistic piece, a back-and-forth between the real world and the dream world. Sometimes, when a writer is in that state of mind, his/her creative work appears simple but has a lot of complexity hidden in it. Some call it ‘obscurantism’ [not sure I spelt that right, hm].

      On the surface, this short poem looks simple (you know, something you shouldn’t worry your head over, in far less than a minute you’ll be through reading it and you’ll just get what the poem is saying in an instant) till you get to the end. It’s a poem you have to read over a couple of times to get its message, dear.

      But I say that the obscurity in the poem, hm, wasn’t well fleshed out right. It needs a lot of work, the title is like a dead giveaway, and I must commend the attempt made at mining a dark side of life. Tuee, don’t rest your oars, hm, for you can do better than this.

  6. Very good poetry, yet I doubt that I know the writers mind or have a fitting interpretation, Emanuella’s interpretation makes some sense anyway.

    1. Em, eh, ah, Mr. Tee, hi, Happy New Year!! Don’t rest on my interpretation, kapish, hm? Go make yours, or try and make yours because mine is subject to change and amendment of some sorts.

  7. hello all,
    thanks for your comments on my poem. I really aprt every one’s opinion. but I’ll quickly say this,that Emmanuella road a lil on my thoughts when I wrote the poem.THE
    POEM IS ABOUT A RESSURECTION OF AN OLD MEMORY{RELATIONSHIP WISE} THAT THE POET FINDS DISTUBING AND NEEDS TO BE DONE AWAY WITH BUT STILL FINDS INTERESTING.{weeds on my barn,scattered over my orchard,smiles like yellow thunder…}THE BLOOD STILL SPEAKS BECAUSE SHE WAS ONCE THERE EVEN WHEN HE HAD BURIED THE PAST…
    this is how far I can explain to you,I once again aprt your comments.thanks

  8. IMAGERIES, FIGS OF SPEECH< this is like tradition raffia mat woven with designs of beauty…. meeen this is fantastic!

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