Sep 062010
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Lade @Lade-A
From the time i could string alphabets together i have loved reading. No matter what i'm doing or where i am you can be sure i have a book tucked somewhere.
My love for writing started with Mills & Boons. I always had to rewrite the endings. I hated happy, lovey-dovey, everything-ends-well endings and didnt know why till i discovered Stephen King and fell in love. I found my niche in the dark side with the horrors, thrillers, mysteries, supernaturals and the unexplainable. Finally, i was home. I'm still home!Go to Lade's profile, and read more of his/her posts.
Good stuff. Turns out the senior was the spirit they were summoning, right?
Yes, Jay. Thanks for encouraging me to put this up.
Wow..Nice one…Now u’ve got your queen of the night unknown so close by….lovely….
Thanks @treasured1. Wetin dem dey find for Sokoto dey inside their sokoto, lol.
YOu scare me, LAde…a few more stories like this and i’d be scared sane!
See…i knew Bola had to be the queen of the winches!!!! Me i don’t believe in co-incidence o!!!!
Nice one. I noticed though…that ‘third and last attempt’ should read…’third and latest attempt’…no?
Scare you sane indeed Seun; that would be a feat.
I believe the sentence is correct as it is. “Third and last attempt” it really should be because she was reminiscing.
Yeah…but they tried after that…no?
I don’t want you sane o, @Seun, i want to read more about Nurse Mercy, lol.
Thanks @Abby.
See this woman…so you like me mad?!?!?
Okay o…remember what happened to the lady and her wig…?
Hmmmm…senior Bola was the mother of the night and she no even ask the pikins wetin dem summon her for? which kind of spirit she be? lol!
Lade,you are the undisputed queen of thriller!
Lol @Estrella, Snr Bola has bad customer relations spirit (pun intended)
Queen of Thriller? Hmmn!
OMG this is tight! So senior Bola is the senior winch! But i wonder what she wants to do with the paper again. She still wants to summon the witch again?
This isreally good stuff, Lade.
Thank you, Uche. She actually collected the paper to put a stop to further summonings.
Oh, really. Now I get it. Thought she was going to use it to find trouble again.
ha ha ha ha!!!!..I should be scared but I am not…what a spirit Senior Bola (Mother of Darkness) turned out to be..Great job Lade..didn’t expect anything less sha.. by the way did you mean ‘hounds of hell’ when you typed ‘hadees of hell’?
Thank you, Mercy. Yes, i meant ‘hounds’, too much Greek mythology made me write ‘hades’, lol.
Oh wow! I’m having mad images about the many possibilities of “Senior Bola”… or not… I like your gift with myteries, Lade.Very very exceptional!
Thank you, Yeti. Please feel free to explore every Snr Bola possibility, mad or not, lol.
Hmmm, ‘Senior Bola’ oh. Mother of Darkness indeed. Nice work Lade.
Yeti; mind yourself oh.
Abeg, leave Yeti alone o, lol.
Thanks, Abby. I actually had a wicked senior in school that i tagged Mother of Darkness a.k.a. M.O.D. She inspired this story.
hehehehhehehe,I like that senior Bola,she is amazing?
All hail NS queen of thriller,senior Lade!!!
Gretty, i’m beginning to fear you o. First you like Jaiye (The Last Supper) nnw you like our Mother of Darkness. Make i run? Lol.
Thanks, dear.
… hmmm … wonders won’t cease to end on NS … heys guys … sems we have to move to the next level o … COOL BABE!
Thanks @boomingsols. And i agree its time to move to the next level. But – whats the next level again? Lol.
Next level of writing of course … u sure are d queen f thriller o Lade … u inspire me alot. Now, this piece is fantastic, I mean very very nice … I was captivated from the beginning till the end. I just love it. nice work … me likey!
Wicked “queen of the night” Does she have to smack the poor kids?
Chimmy, if she doesn’t smack, how will she manifest the physical aspect of her spiritual powers? Lol.
Hmmmmm
very nice story.
i even seem to find senior Bola cool.
well done my # 1.
Nah, Paul, dark powers so uncool, apart from Angel’s powers of course (of the Angel and Buffy, the Vampire Slayer series) Now, he is really cool.
Lade u did well with this one again, it read well for me and i like, this free bouquet of stories on N.S is getting addictive for me ohhh…
Thank you, Elly. Glad i wrote this up to expectation.
You are just getting addicted to NS?! I passed obsessed months back.
You tight, you bad… you wicked.
Nice gripping plot. SPIRITS? I didnt even guess it was Senior Bola until the first girl mentioned she called her.
You introductory narrative about lost of father, traveling out of the country and back made it all so believable.
But…………. please i hope say na just story sha? i mean you really no do all this spirit summoning stuff, abeg o
Lol @Leno. Its just a story but i’m happy it was so believable. I tried a few summonings in my younger days a la Charmed and The Teenage witch style (whats her name again?) but [un]fortunately, none ever worked.
@Lade,
What I liked about this story is that I didn’t immediately recognise that Senior Bola was the spirit; I also liked the depiction of the spirit as a ‘familiar’ senior (rather than an otherworldly creature). I also liked the way that the main character reminisced about her past.
I’m not so sure about the reference to the slain activist father. The way it was introduced at the beginning, I had thought that this was a significant part of the story – but it looks like it was this was not the case.
Well done, and thanks.
Thank you, Tola. A comment from you is always valued.
The preamble about the father was to explain the gap years between the Senior Bola incidence and the present. There had to be a good reason why her discovery of the Queen of the night came to such an abrupt inconclusive end and a sudden flight from home and hearth, while explaining that, had to also have a good reason. Did i overdo it?
@Lade, I agree that the story works if Osese has to leave before finding out more about the Queen of the Night. I just wonder if the leaving has to be so abrupt, or because of such a traumatic event. Maybe the story would have worked if Osese’s father had a posting abroad and it was in her last days in Nigeria that she discovered that she could summon the Queen.
The problem with introducing such highly dramatic events in a story is that they tend to overshadow the rest of the story to the point where a reader may pay more attention to these events than they deserve. For example, I wondered at one point whether it was Senior Bola who sent the assassins to kill the Osese’s father…
@TolaO – Yeah, you are right. I will rewrite it so that Osese will discover the truth about Senior Bola right on the eve of her family’s (plus a very much alive father) planned departure for greener pastures. A time when it will be too late for her to say or do anything abou it.
That will definitely read much better. Thanks, Tola. I really appreciate your input on this.
What more can i say Lade? Those that are calling you the Queen of thriller on NS sure know what they are saying.I’m loving this one.
wow! although this evoked some laughter at some point, its more chilling at the end, where she finds out that Senior Bola is the witch, and the innocence of the girls is so cute! then the smacking of thier heads is symbolic as well, clearly she was trying to distract them from controlling her, or knowing the truth…very nice…the girls have heart…as yorubas will say…