‘You killed your own baby, you liar!
Even as he said the words to her, he knew that he had made a terrible mistake. The look on her face had him flinching on the inside but he refused to budge.
‘You told me you had a missed abortion, what the hell is that’?
‘You never wanted the baby in the first place so you must have taken some pills to kill our baby’.
They were standing outside the church office where they had just finished a counseling session with the pastor. If she could have turned any ashier under her beautiful dark brown skin, she would have.
He pushed way the fact that they had had unmarried sex several times even when she didn’t want to; he always had his way of getting what he wanted.
He forgot the fact that she had boldly told her parents about the baby even when she knew that she faced the risk of being disowned by her father. He was the Leader of the charismatic movement in the largest parish in Zaria after all.
He shoved at the back of his mind the fact that she had reported herself to the pastor of her church the minute she had found out she was pregnant.
‘I want us to be accountable’, she had told him, her eyes pleading for understanding.
He willed himself to forget her sobs over the phone when she called him while was lounging in front of his computer in his parent’s house.
‘The baby’, she had babbled over the line.
‘I’m losing the baby…I’m bleeding’.
He had rushed down to her side; A three hour drive from Abuja to Kano.
He had watched the nurse shove her fat hand into her Vagina in the airless hospital room
Had watched her shoulders slump as the nurse briskly declared,
‘We have to do an immediate D & C’.
He had heard her whimpers of pain through the thin walls as they scraped out the remains of their child.
He forgot that he had wept like a baby when they showed him the parts in a cold stainless bowl; blood and flesh twisted in an unrecognizable mass.
Yes…he told himself to forget all that as he stood in front of her and said coldly again,
‘You killed our baby’.
Her lips were glued shut and her eyes were as wide as saucers. He didn’t try to stop her as she walked away without a word, her back straight and her steps heavy.
She couldn’t say a word because she wasn’t sure what she would say to him. After all they had been through together, he really thought she would induce an abortion? Really?
With his hands in his pocket, he watched her until she was just a blur in the distance, his eyes unblinking.
When she finally disappeared, he heaved a sigh and shuddered, sobs racking his frame. It was better this way.
The pastor had said after all that he didn’t have anything to offer her and advised them to break up and start afresh apart.
He was a school dropout without a steady job
He still lived with his parents
He smoked marijuana to while away his time.
He was a no one, and he didn’t want to pull her down with him.
An hour later, he was at home when he got the call. It was from the pastor
‘Jake, this is Pastor Ken. Sarah was just hit by a car; I’m sorry, she didn’t make it’.
The phone slipped from his hand and clanged to the floor.