The true love that they didnt know about

The true love that they didnt know about

All the time he has her in his mind
Thinking about what to say
how to say
he kneels down to pray
heavens grant me strenght today
to just ask this beautiful girl her name.

he sees her every time
at the grocery store
At the special funtions
Dressing to kill just to get her attention
Standing out yet staying alone just to get her to look his way

She make his heart burn
She makes him want to cry because she makes him go crazy
At the club he always sees her face
Is this true love for someone i dont even know?
How will i ever know she is the one for me now
i havent even managed a phone number

he mans up
he says whatever men
love stinks and i will deal with it
he comes down the city plaza
in the elevator 15 floors to his destination

There she was holding files
A look of suprise from him made her shake and the files fell from her grasp
he gladly goes down on his knees to help
she starring into his eyes said
you are that guy from oxford street
he was shocked
she went on to say actually she had been seeing him around
At the grocery
At the parties
At the Clubs even
But he was always gone when she had the chance to meet him

Short of words
The moment at come where he could take the prize or shoot himself in the legs
“my name is alfred can i take you out sometime so we can get to know each other”
Silent at the 18th floor,
the doors open she walks into the elevator and she turns
“Meet me at VIP tonight
You know where
and please dress sexy as you always do”.

9 thoughts on “The true love that they didnt know about” by aderemi Oluwaseyi (@valentinoseyi)

  1. I like but be mindful of ur spellings, pay more attention to punctuations and please Alfy, show up at the VIP? tonight and do look sharp, as you always do.
    I really like.
    Well done Aderemi

  2. Okay. This almost began to look like Prose but hey, you have the poetic license and nothing should stop you.

    I like the surprising ending – ‘and please dress sexy as you always do’ which tells that the girl had always noticed the guy when he thot she never saw him.

    Still, you could try flowering up the language a bit for sake of beautiful flow of words.


  3. i dint really know if this was a story or a poem.
    maybe you can tell me ?

  4. @Andy baba – lol it doesnt have to be classified, am not a professional yet so lets just call it a write up

  5. Good stuff. Just spelling and punctuation errors. Then club doesn’t fit the xter, maybe church or park or some other place like that ‘d been better. Story was good and the way it was told too. U got great talent for a beginner.

  6. wow…this is what i call the “ive been watching you watching me” kinda thing…:)…rili nyc …i luv it!

  7. Needless to say, the typos have been pointed out. Nice writ.

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